[He wanted this time to... To what? To get drunk. To forget. Except that it's not really working, because what does he have to forget that it's worth it?]
[His birthday? He spent it with Leanne.]
[Esmeralda's death? He will never forget it, how it was his fault in every single way from the moment he arrived to the island and met her without pushing her away. He will never forget the weight of her body in his arms, the warmth banishing and her skin going pale. Or where he buried her body, or the flowers he took the time to transplant to her grave, so she would have the only good thing on that island with her forever. Or until the volcano exploded and erased everything.]
[All the deaths during the battle against Hades? Saga, Camus and Shura giving up their honour as Saints to try to reach Athena before the Specters, to give her a chance in the war. Shaka's sacrifice to allow them to go on while he went ahead with the plan when he figured what it was, leaving nothing but blood in petals and ashes in the wind. The ultimate sacrifice of the Gold Saints. Kanon. Pandora. Seiya in a wheelchair, dying.]
[That may be the most haunting of everything at the moment. But it's only worse because Seiya was there in Genessia for a bit, reminded Ikki why he had to return, to be stronger. And then he vanished, while Ikki played cook and husband in a mansion instead of trying to rip to shreds time and space to go back and fight with his brothers.]
[Because it's nice. The life where he wakes up everyday in a bed, soft and warm with someone besides him. The life where he cooks for his family and any worry about their safety, while present, isn't as intense because there's not a constant ongoing war raining on them. The life where he thinks about a future.]
[The life Saori claimed she wanted for them. The life he said that could never be theirs because they would never fit anywhere except among the Saints.]
[But there's no place for a Saint here. And Leanne and her people have no need for a Saint.]
[And it's easy to give in. And nice.]
[And absolutely not himself.]
[But it's what Leanne needs. It's the price to be with her, isn't it? And he will pay it. To try to make her happy even if such a thing still seems impossible for him because... How can he make anyone happy?]
You want to drink and you want me... So you shall have both.
[He frowns as she talks about the last time he told her not to move. He doesn't remember, at least not right now. So he just stares at her like an idiot.]
Breathe. And drink. And talk to me. But nothing more!
[Video]
[He wanted this time to... To what? To get drunk. To forget. Except that it's not really working, because what does he have to forget that it's worth it?]
[His birthday? He spent it with Leanne.]
[Esmeralda's death? He will never forget it, how it was his fault in every single way from the moment he arrived to the island and met her without pushing her away. He will never forget the weight of her body in his arms, the warmth banishing and her skin going pale. Or where he buried her body, or the flowers he took the time to transplant to her grave, so she would have the only good thing on that island with her forever. Or until the volcano exploded and erased everything.]
[All the deaths during the battle against Hades? Saga, Camus and Shura giving up their honour as Saints to try to reach Athena before the Specters, to give her a chance in the war. Shaka's sacrifice to allow them to go on while he went ahead with the plan when he figured what it was, leaving nothing but blood in petals and ashes in the wind. The ultimate sacrifice of the Gold Saints. Kanon. Pandora. Seiya in a wheelchair, dying.]
[That may be the most haunting of everything at the moment. But it's only worse because Seiya was there in Genessia for a bit, reminded Ikki why he had to return, to be stronger. And then he vanished, while Ikki played cook and husband in a mansion instead of trying to rip to shreds time and space to go back and fight with his brothers.]
[Because it's nice. The life where he wakes up everyday in a bed, soft and warm with someone besides him. The life where he cooks for his family and any worry about their safety, while present, isn't as intense because there's not a constant ongoing war raining on them. The life where he thinks about a future.]
[The life Saori claimed she wanted for them. The life he said that could never be theirs because they would never fit anywhere except among the Saints.]
[But there's no place for a Saint here. And Leanne and her people have no need for a Saint.]
[And it's easy to give in. And nice.]
[And absolutely not himself.]
[But it's what Leanne needs. It's the price to be with her, isn't it? And he will pay it. To try to make her happy even if such a thing still seems impossible for him because... How can he make anyone happy?]
You want to drink and you want me... So you shall have both.
[He frowns as she talks about the last time he told her not to move. He doesn't remember, at least not right now. So he just stares at her like an idiot.]
Breathe. And drink. And talk to me. But nothing more!
[Pause.]
And blink. That too.