genessia | [Video] [OTA]

YES! The shitty paperwork finally went through!

A'ight y'all, listen up! If y' ain't scared a the dark an' y' ain't scared a ghosts an' vampires an' werewolves an' shit an' yer the kinda person that likes t' get paid...

[He takes a deep breath. That was a lot to say in one breath!]

I'm hirin'!

Need someone t' work full time on the de- phone. Gotta be good at organizin' shit an' makin' schedules an' keepin' track a who's where an' how long they're gonna be at it. Rent y' a li'l office t' work in if y' need, or y' can work from yer own place if that's how y' do. Whatever, so long as y' do a good job I don't give a shit how y' get it done. Officially called the position a scheduler, so if that's the kinda river y' feed int', gimme a ring.

An' I'mma need a buncha badasses t' do the rest. 'S part-time, probly. Move y' up t' full time if we get swamped. Gonna be the kinda work that goes well with bounty huntin' or hangin' in the dungeon or fightin' the coliseum circuit, actually. Jus' somethin' kinda steady y' can do on the side so y' ain't gotta worry if y' need a week off or some shit, aye? All y' gotta do's walk with people an' make sure they get where they's goin', safe an' sound. Prob'ly usually after dark. In Everglade. So there's yer catch, sheheheheh! Gotta know yer way 'round the city or be willin' t' learn it damn fast, in case y' gotta change someone's route for reasons, if y' catch my drift. Also gotta be badass 'nuff t' discourage folk lookin' t' pick a fight with someone, aye? An' beyond that, badass 'nuff t' finish the damn fight an' come out on top if discouragement don't work. Sounds like shit y' wanna do, then let's chat, aye?

Last thing. If yer someone that needs t' get 'round from one place t' 'nother an' yer feelin' a bit nervous 'bout gettin' mugged or hunted, give Jolly Eddy's a call. We'll find y' a friend t' make sure y' get where yer goin' as fuss free as possible. Day or night, no questions asked. Fliers go up at the beginnin' a the week.

That's all.

Later Gaters!

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

[It takes Karla a moment to sort through all that language to figure out what the hell he's talking about.]

So...does this mean you're hiring escorts to protect people?

That sounds lovely! I wouldn't mind being part-time. There's heroism to perform in every city, of course, though Everglade is near and dear to my heart. I'd almost say I've grown too familiar with it. Besides, protecting decent people, rather than tracking down indecent villains ought to be a nice change of pace.

Hey, ain't heard from y' in awhile! Damn right, y' got it in one, sweetheart! Lookin' for a li'l cash on the side?

One city at a time, man. Everglade had 'nuff paperwork t' fell a shitty forest an' I ain't in no damn hurry t' fell 'nother jus' yet. Business takes off though we'll definitely expand. Maybe even start offerin' a Gate service if people wanna see what the rest a their world looks like.

Gotta swear y' ain't gonna be an asshole though. 'S a no questions asked, no judgin' no one kinda job, catch me? Someone needs y' t' get 'em from the bar t' the brothel y' can't say a word 'bout it.

[She can't help but laugh.]

I wish I could, but my jobs keep me busy enough as it is.

[So she already has more cash than she knows what to do with.]

Aw damn.

[Look how sad his face is. It is the saddest. And then it turns into the mildly confused aw shit I can't remember a thing face.]

Yer one a the Guardians or sub-Guardians or somethin' right? Which city y' in?

Well of--

[He stopped. The sorts of places Everglade citizens--Evergladians?--might want to go ran a lot worse than that. Suppose they want a trip to the cemetery to inquire of their departed elders? God, he wanted no part in that. He wondered how Namur himself could stand to be so breezy about it, given slavery's largely open nature. What if someone requests a trip to the 'auction'?]

[It's too bad; it sounded like a decent venture. But he couldn't afford to compromise on virtue.] In that case, I'll have to decline. I'll be happy to work for free on the innocent cases, should you need me, however.

[He'll get them there. And if a couple of other badass slavery-haters happen to show up later and wreck the joint, well. What happens to a person after they've been delivered safely to their destination has nothing to do with his business.]

[Namur chuckles.]

Hey man, ain't no crime t' go from one place t' 'nother an' not wanna get ate. The hell y' mean innocent cases?

[It's pretty clear to people who know how to read expressions and tone of voice that Namur's just giving Ted shit at the moment.]

[Laughter is easier than tears]

Goodness, all that litigation seems to have made you quite legalistic. If only chicanery were a crime, you might love law a little less.

Haha, if I could make you understand innocence, you might edge away from hell! You might be better served with a practical definition: "whatever I approve as such."

[You poor, cute little fishy, you...]

I'm the Deputy Guardian of Genessia City.

Oh! [Blair jumps up and down excitedly] How about a cute kitty guard?

[Well...why not. It's not like he's earning karma points to go to heaven. And with his recent new home having opened at Everglade, he comes and goes from work to his mansion.]

Hmm, a guard service to protect people at night in Everglade? Well, I suppose you can add me to your list, considering I live there.

What sort've pay are we talking for either position?

*Sonico is at home when she hears this message from Namur, studying hard - her hair is tied up and seems to be held in place with a couple of pencils*

Namur, have you set up your own business?

Riiiight. So what all's a Guardian an' Deputy Guardian do? Buncha shitty paperwork like they made me do for administration or whatever or are y' more like, out runnin' down assholes causin' problems?

Well that's a shitty definition. First off, ain't no one can live by that since there ain't no one can get in yer head an' know for sure if y' 'prove a somethin' or not. Second, yer kinda an ass 'bout anythin' fun. Third, why you an' not me, eh? Or someone else entirely. Like Sonico or that bitchy other priest?

Hmm. I'unno sweetheart. 'S gonna be a lotta borin' work an' the boys ain't always gonna be too hot. What if y' find someone cuter t' be with halfway through, huh?

Add y' t' the list if y' qualify, numbskull. Who the hell are y', an' what the hell makes y' think y' can handle it, eh?

Uhhh, well the walker boys is gonna depend on how busy we get, catch me? Some fancy accountant did some shit an' says we might could figure on 'bout two or three thousand Red Bills a month.

[For ooc reference, that's around **.]

Scheduler's gonna hafta be able t' answer the phone all day an' keep track a everbody, so it'll be a full time thing. Said forty-five hunnerd's [***] fair for that kinda work. 'S like bein' an administrative assistant or some shit. So that's where we'll start off. Figure that's a good baseline, an' whatever y' need more'n that y' can make doin' bounties or whatever else makes y' happy.

Intrested?

Damn right, sweetheart. Called it Jolly Eddy's, after my old Pops. Always liked t' laugh an' meet new people an' kick assholes outta the ocean, so it seems fittin'. Sorry I been kinda busy an' ain't talked t' y'. How's yer ribs?

[Very mildly.]

Hmm, being a resident in Everglade doesn't qualify? I'm Sebastian. I think I can punch a vampire and make him cry from pain for half an hour.

Jus' who the hell y' think our clients is gonna be? People that live in Everglade. Sheheheh c'mon, man!

Punchin' vampires is a good start. Whatcha gonna do 'bout a ghost?

Aw, my expertise is very much physical. I would say I'm a specialists martial artist, and whatever weapon I can get my hands on one.

With ghosts, its a simple matter of a staring contest and a reminder that Hell is a real destination.

An' if they ain't convinced?

Then there's nothing else I can do and leave it be.

Anyway, as I said, I tend to return from work from Nova City to my house in Everglade late at night. I could spare a few hours late at night for a helpless citizen or damsel in distress during my commute.

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