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[he is sitting in what very much looks like the office of some laid back lecturer with a helpful globe on the desk, though it looks wrong as things keep shifting around, as well as pictures on the desk, shaping away from the camera]

Right so. I lied. I am not Joe Cool. Yes everyone who guessed right gets a cookie and a nice pat yourself on the back for being so clever. Go ahead. I don't mind. Over yourselves? Excellent.

I am the Doctor. There is another man who calls himself the Doctor and he is, in fact, me. You could ask but you'd be wasting your breath. Just don't question it and learn to live a little. Or alternatively ask someone who knows me and see what they will tell you.

Anyway, point is, I am here to help. So if there is something pressing I do have office hours posted outside the big blue police box. Please fill out your name and approximate time of the meeting. Don't hold your breath on the weekends however. If there is an emergency well. I'll find it. Believe me I always do.

However, if you are currently mad at me, that is to say, the Doctor. And by mad I mean furious, angry, want to maim or otherwise want to vent problematic elements of our current relationship, please come and see me and get it out of your system. I am the up to date operating system as it were and the other is still getting the bugs cleared out. But since I was him I can be blamed for all the himming he does.

If you vent your spleen at him instead, I shall be very cross. It's not all that easy keeping ourselves together, you know, especially when there is more than one of me in the same room so, angry as you may be, have consideration.

Anyway! [he drums his hands against the table] That's all I had to say. Staff meeting at ten. Tea at eleven. Twelve is when the fun starts. Oh, and if you know of any good indoor ice skating rinks, let me know. Provided we don't all drown in buckets of angst, it might be fun to get some lead out if you know what I mean.

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"Alright, any help you can give me towards helping other you would be...." [she trailed off and made a face.] "So... ice skating then? Mood you're in, the both of you, you really think strapping blades to your feet is such a great idea?" [she teased with a hint of a grin.]

No idea. If I knew that I'd tell you. If I could make it any better I would. But I am up a creek with no paddles and not even a canoe with a waterfall ahead. [hopeless shrug]

It's not so much violence as he'll just puddle right on the ice in a fit of depression so... I'm not really counting on it being a [airquotes] "thing". But maybe for the rest of us.

[She doesn't know whether to laugh, or cry, just goes to find him in person.]

What happened?

[he spins a bit on his spinny chair and regards her, wondering if he should place the pictures flat but decides to leave them up. There is River as she was and Susan as she used to be. He hadn't the hearts to root out Alexander though he must be somewhere in the TARDiSes visual database. She could think of it as she wanted and if she asked why she wasn't there, well, she was right in front of him.]

To put it bluntly, younger me is having a whopper of an existential meltdown and cracking under the pressure of too much relationship drama and enough guilt to make ears me look positively optimistic. [he scratches the lobe of his ear absently with the eraser part of a pencil]

I've no idea what to do about it or how to fix it except by this. Which is probably akin to pissing into the wind but... [he shakes his head] What else can I do?

[Rose double face palmed.]

[She shouldn't have come.]

[She should have stayed away.]

[Gotten a hotel.]

[Anything else.]

[What was she supposed to do?]

[The TARDIS gently chided her.]

[She reluctantly took her hands down.]

Last conversation I had with him, I tried to escape. To get out. He told me he loved me the same as Martha.

I wasn't very nice about it.

[DEEP BREATH.]

[She doesn't want to do this but fuck it. Seriously. THINGS CAN GET WORSE, BUT PROBABLY MORE IF THEY DON'T GET THIS STUPIDITY OUT OF THE WAY.}

Talked to Jack about your face.

Did you know? About... why it bugs him? About what happened to end Torchwood in your universe? [Not her universe anymore. Was Pete's Universe hers? Could she ever accept even the idea of that?]

I'd owe you a punch for leaving him as a fixed point, since originally I was going to let that out on your younger self, but since you want to take responsibility for him... only I'm also too numb and angry to do anything about it. Besides I'm sure the words will cause you anguish enough.

[Sits on the desk and looks at the pictures. River Song, for sure... and... granddaughter? Which just makes her ache for Steven, and Jack, and want to punch the Doctor that they abandoned Jack, that he had to face it all alone, without even the two best friends who made him that way.]

[Rose just looks sadly at it, and then back to the Doctor.]

We abandoned Jack. He needed friends. Needed help, and we weren't there for him. Have you looked him up at all?

Your younger self said loves Jack like me and Martha.

[Does he really know what love is?]

[She gently traces the outline of River's curly hair, and back up to peer at the grey haired Doctor.]

Amy said you married Cleopatra, and so did River Song. [Sets her jaw.]

Are you going to tell me you loved them the same as Renneitte and me?

[Draws circles with her finger on the desktop.] I told your younger self he didn't stand a chance with me. Not to waste his chance with Martha. I guess I broke him.

[She meant to say sorry. But she wasn't. She simply wasn't. What did he think was going to happen? That they'd all... what? Play house? She told him she loved him, and his response was that everything ended, and he loved Martha as much as he loved Rose. Woot.]

[She could laugh at it. Almost.]

[It was just so...]

[Stupid.]

Amy said River has a lot of different... marriages. At one time. [Eye roll.]

Thing is yeah? No, it really does insult me. Because I remember how jealous you were. I remember how you wouldn't let me dance with Jack. And good for you growin' up. But he, your younger self, is just delusional if he thinks he can just...

[Throws her hands in the air in exasperation.] I told him what I told you. That I'm the best, and I'm not wastin' my time, no, not even here with someone who doesn't get that. Who doesn't put in his all. Who's got one foot out the door, thinkin' that little moments or just me isn't enough.

I never asked for you to be human. [Steady look at at him.] And I don't want you to be. And I am a little upset that you forced me to choose. Made it act like there even was a choice. [Understatement of the century. She was only JUST BARELY beginning to cool off.] But I'm mostly mad that you hated yourself more than you loved me. And I don't know how to tell him that. Because you have to be the best to be with me, because I am the best. I'm not ever going to settle. And if he thinks I'm on the same with Martha and Jack...

[She closes her eyes again.]

[What can she say? He's an idiot.]

I don't know what to tell you, but I figure you should hear it from the bad wolf's mouth, yeah?

But if you're you and he's you, then who is flying the plane?

"Well, you and me, we'll figure it out. What do you know? We'll work from there. And if we can't find a paddle, we'll just have to learn to fly."

"I was more afraid of him calculating how many times he needs to skata an exact circle to break through the ice. Course, with our luck, that'll be because there is something trapped under there. Yet another beast below to save."

I don't think I have a reason to be mad at you.

[Even if the name thing wasn't true, but she paused for a moment.]

I am not mad at either of you, though I don't think I've met the other, so... no anger here.

[Well... that was certainly a lot of information that probably didn't apply to her in any way whatsoever. Should she even bother asking? No, probably not.]

So... are you a police man?

[He did mention a big blue police box and office hours... he could be a detective of some sort, and if she was going to be living here she should try to get to know the local law enforcement, right? Well, even if he wasn't, meeting new people wasn't a bad thing.]

A police doctor perhaps?

[Did the police usually need their own physicians?]

Listen it's a very long and complicated story. You just be you and try not to worry about it too much. It will fix itself in time. [a lie but there are too many cooks in the kitchen already

He does chuckle a bit ruefully at that morbid thought but hopes it never goes that far]

I was thinking he'd end up face down on the ice and end up a tripping hazard for others.

[though that metaphor may be a bit too on the nose for his liking]

"So, when he falls flat on his face, then.... how bad would it be for me to suggest he puts some ice on it?" [She grinned at him a bit, then shook her head.] "Tried being me since I got here, only seems to make things worse. Not really used to that."

[he takes a moment to regard that tiny fluttering thing called hope, scoop it up gently and metaphorically in his hands and chuck it out the window because it's going to be no help here. Rose is a solid stone wall of disappointment and he can't blame her and he can't help her and he can't do anything but be the old bastard he's long since become accustomed to being.

Leaving Jack aside for the moment because that's an entirely different pot of squid, he kicks his feet up onto the desk, ankles crossed, and folds his hands over his stomach]

There's different ways and levels of loving someone. There's different reasons for marrying as well, not always borne out of love or even affection. Sometimes it just happens. Especially to me. [but it's not her business which it is.]

But with you, Martha and Jack, it's like the triumvirate of guilt. I won't say I know what Martha felt or feels for us but at the time it felt like it was going a second round and we weren't ready for it. It didn't go well. You being apart from us, well as you said, holding us back. But it's not that. It wasn't. It was mourning. It was a volatile time.

You see, the thing is, Time Lords are not generally predisposed to waves of emotion, though some carry theirs closer to the surface than others. We were like a raw nerve at the end of the Time War and being with you bought all those emotions right to the surface so Twiggy is basically a bundle of feelings that are increasingly intense and increasingly hard to deal with. [he holds up his hands]

And before you get sarcastic or angry or upset, I'm not saying that emotions are a bad thing or being with you was a bad thing but it's definitely not an easy thing. Especially when there are the three of you and you specifically are pissed beyond measure and are Bad Wolf Snarling. Which, I'm not saying you don't have justification for. It's just how it is.

You are how you are, he is how he is. He's trying to hold it together and constantly being smacked in the face by waves full of gravel.

I'm not saying what you did was wrong and I'm not defending myself but it's just what it is. Anyway, I don't expect a solution to come from this or anything to come from this because everyone is hurting and even though I am the Doctor, all I can do is look and say: Oh well it seems you have quite a bit of existential angst, it would be nice if someone could remove it.

[he shrugs]

[She's quiet for a bit and finally:]

Okay.

[he grins] If you're prepared for him to frown at you go ahead.

[but then in a more serious and slightly exasperated face]

Keep being you. It's not going to make a difference what you try or don't try. Not because of you but because of me. That me. So don't worry about him and just have fun and count on this me like you used to.

[he winks at her. It's not really a him him thing to do but it seemed like something he used to do. Only much less awkwardly this time around]

[he's not sure if he made it worse or not. He's hedging on worse because really if you start at the bottom, provided there isn't a cave in, the only way you can go is up.

He watches her for a moment, swiveling a little in the spinny chair and then finally shrugs and holds the pencil between two fingers of two hands, just because]

Anyway, whatever it is you want to do, I'll support you. A hundred percent.

The plane... flies itself. [makes the expanding 'mind blown!' gesture]

Well that's good to know. Might change. Tends to do so. We seem to make more enemies than friends. Just the nature of what happens when you go around and meddle in everything, I suppose.

No it just looks like a police box. I am not a doctor but the Doctor. The definite article as they say. The oncoming storm. The one with really screwed up priorities that nevertheless manages to get the job done sixty-six times out of a hundred.

[he equivocates a bit]

Well let's make it seventy-five. Though if was completely honest it would be a hundred and ten but there is some small margin of error.

[Her eyes slide over, watching him.]

Why?

[She tries to keep the obvious suspiciousness out of her voice, and mostly succeeds, though she doubts it fools the Doctor much, even just going down back to one-word answers is a clue, and she can't stop either.]

Well I am assuming that you're not going to go out and rip Twiggy another new one because I'd have to at least throw myself in your path.

Otherwise, I may be an absolute shite lover, but I always thought I was your friend if nothing else. Could be wrong. [he holds up his hands] If you want to break it off completely that's your call and I respect it.

I'm here for you. For something. For nothing. Whatever needs to be done.

"Starting to get used ti it, actually. Doesn't mean I'm going to stop trying, though. [She grinned at him.] "I'm Pond. Amy Pond. Not planning on being anyone else any time soon." [Well, Amy Williams, but she figures he knows that.] "And you're my best friend. Having fun with you is what I always do, Doctor."

[Friends. Because he knew her. Knew she wasn't going to purposely hurt his past more, knew she was protecting him as best she knew how too, trusted her. It wasn't because he hated himself so much he was ready to rev Rose up and set her loose.]

[Everything happens in a split second, she pulled the Doctor forward by his scruff in the front of his neck and hoodie strings and kissed him hard like he was oxygen and she'd just gone several months more than a bit starved of it.]

Is it also you?

[well this doesn't make things confusing at all. He's not sure whether to kiss her back or just sit here and let her have at it because everything is just a bit mixed up. Best to just let it get it out of her system. For the moment.

When she finally does give him space to breathe he clears his throat once or twice]

And that was supposed to indicate....?

Well... That's kind of an interesting question. [he wiggles his hand back and forth] We do have a kind of symbiotic relationship so you can say it is a part of me. But not as me as the other me who was literally me oh... I don't know... couple of thousand years ago?

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