Video

[feckinboomstick]

So it looks like, as is per the usual for the area, that things have gone, to put it simply as possible, right tits up.

Again.

I know a few of ye are new here, and haven't gotten to experience all the joys of whatever the devil happens when the angry, ancient, crazed deities of this dimension get bored of sittin' around playin' the biscuit game and decide to take a leak in all of our collective wheaties.

Tis what's happenin' now, I assume.

Nae, don't bother questionin' it, it'll all be over in less than a fortnight.

In any case, this upturnin' of the tits is a semi regular, near bi-weekly event, so I figure if it's going to be runnin' on a somewhat predictable schedule, I'll make the events as tolerable as I can.

So there's a new special at the shop what for when tittage aims upwards and it's the "Oh Bugger Me, Everythin's Gone Tit's Up Again" special, or, for those of ye with shit to do and not enough time to speak it, "Three an' one free."

Aye, it's a promotional for a pub, I don't know what ye all expected.

Come in and spend three red bills or more in the shop, and ye get one free pint of Guinness.

If ye want more than a pint, well you'll be happy to know Velvet Lust down in Genessia sells 'em by the flagon.

You're welcome.

Nae, just one pint a person here because I've the inkling that mixin' large amounts of alcohol with explosives, focus daggers and enchanted crystals might cause further raisin' of the tits here. Don't ye feckin' get plastered in me shop.

Cloak and Dagger in Everglade, because ye can't stop what's already happened so ye may as well have a drink and wait it out.

Comments

text

[black_black_heart]

so I've been asked if there's going to be cake

[ Tannu that has nothing to do with current shenanigans, sale or otherwise-- ]

you like chocolate? everyone likes chocolate

[ Video ]

[bright_imperius]

[ He even almost understood all of that, despite the accent, too. ]

I think you might want to run a promotion after it's all over, as well.

Maybe a ... "Finally Things Are Slightly Less Ass Over Tits" ...

... And, since I'd imagine the people affected will need plenty of liquor even without any discount, you'd charge less for the food at your cantina instead.

Re: text

[feckinboomstick]

That hasn't got a thing to do with the announcement, Tannusen.

And I like coffee or rum cake.

[Neither of which are what people have at weddings you ass]

Re: [ Video ]

[feckinboomstick]

Look, if I did that, then I'd have to hand out free booze everyday, and if I did that, I may as well rebrand to the Cloak and Dagger Get Sloshed Here House.

[ Video ]

[bright_imperius]

[ Laughs, because, he's so right. ]

That's why I suggested a discount on your snacks - with the chaos that happens around here, I'm guessing you really don't need to encourage much more business.

And, when they eat more, they'll buy more drinks, that's how these things usually go.

Re: [ Video ]

[feckinboomstick]

Really don't got too much by way of snacks here, if I am to be honest.

There was that one time. With the unexpected crisp shipment.

[TANNUSEN.]

T'was merely an attempt to shift stock that time though, had to clear out space in me broom closet.

[black_black_heart]

of course you do

but what if I make it

look i remember what code is

[feckinboomstick]

What, make coffee cake? I'd eat cake foundation if you made it, Tannusen, you know that.

:o

[black_black_heart]

chocolate

aw that almost sounds like you like me

[ TANNU YOU'RE ENGAGED. ]

[feckinboomstick]

Tannusen, we're engaged.

Yes of course I'll eat chocolate, I'm not that boring.

Who even asked about cake?

[black_black_heart]

darling I don't think I've ever called you boring

picky, on the other hand

fussy

maaaaybe

[ Video ]

[bright_imperius]

What kind of cantina doesn't have snacks?

[ He's more curious than anything else. Takumi tries to recall to see this user's transmissions on the datapad before. He keeps coming up with a blank. ]

[feckinboomstick]

What kind of dullard doesn't like chocolate except super tasting hypersensitive adult children who live off saltless french fries and milk?

[black_black_heart]

this is text so you can't hear me laughing

but it's happening anyway

Re: [ Video ]

[feckinboomstick]

Mate, this ain't a cantina, it's a shop for magical items. Focuses, crystals, herbs and supplies what to grow 'em, charms and wards and runes and spell books, filled and empty alike.

I'm givin' away Guinness cos my fiance runs a pub.

And I like Guinness.

[feckinboomstick]

It's a serious question to an extent, I feel not liking chocolate tends to be an excellent indicator on whether or not you're interesting or evil

[black_black_heart]

you may have a point there

somehow I think Takeda wasn't a fan? but he was also incredibly dull and probably evil

[ A demon-possessed yakuza boss? Yeah, just maybe. ]

[feckinboomstick]

Well being dull and evil means your favorite flavour is either birthday cake or pistachio and that's a kind of person I can't be friends with.

[black_black_heart]

now I'm sad he's not here for me to shove at you and watch the show

I'm not even joking right now, it would be priceless

you'd wreck his shit in like five seconds flat and it would be glorious

[ Video ]

[bright_imperius]

... Huh.

We don't really have things quite like that where I came from.

[ Crystals, sure, for his lightsaber, but. Otherwise, you either were Force sensitive, or you weren't. You couldn't buy a charm or a book to give you that kind of power.

But he'd read about it, in the library, and it fascinated him.

If nothing else, maybe he'd find some of the crystals useful. ]

... Maybe I should check it out.

[feckinboomstick]

Tannusen, I'm not going to slap about a demon for the sake of amusement without at least half a pitcher of beer in me.

Re: [ Video ]

[feckinboomstick]

Well, if ye come here, like what ye see and make a purchase of three dollars or more, that's a free drink, if that sweetens the pot for ye.

[black_black_heart]

you don't think I'd prime the pump, as it were?

I'm hurt!

video

[corruptedsave]

But what about customers who aren't old enough to drink?

[Because the term "focus daggers" caught their attention.]

Re: video

[feckinboomstick]

Well then ye ain't old enough to buy anythin' here that ain't a book or a plant I'm afraid.

[He's already turned down a kid trying to buy explosive runes, Chara. Don't get him wrong, you're one of the least annoying people he knows here... so far!

But kids don't get boom booms and stab stabs]