Eliot Durant (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
anamnestik) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
genessia2018-09-12 12:04 pm
anamnestik) wrote in genessia2018-09-12 12:04 pm
video / action
[video]
Pardon my strange question... When do feelings of friendship become something... else? And what is the best remedy for stopping such feelings? Not to imply it is unpleasant, or I've no desire to love the person in question. Merely that this is going to be an inconvenience for them.
And are those with budding romantic feelings for another still permitted to invite the person of their affection on dates? Is that taboo? It feels so very wrong.
... Maybe I'll use the pocketwatch and forget all of this. This is criminal of me.
[action : various cities]
[Eliot has gone off on a self-help love quest, because all of this really bugs him. He's not sure how valid his emotions are, given that his personality is a temporary front for his "library self." He's been stopping in book stores and convenience stores, even stopping in grocery stores, to pick up those trashy teenage gossip magazines. Particularly anything that promises to explain the social etiquette of modern romance.
He's also been picking up trashy magazines of a less appropriate variety. You'll know he picked up and flipped to a scandalous article when you hear him scream in public and hastily close the magazine, glowing red from embarrassment.]
o-oh... oh my goodness...! Modern publishing is shameless...!
Pardon my strange question... When do feelings of friendship become something... else? And what is the best remedy for stopping such feelings? Not to imply it is unpleasant, or I've no desire to love the person in question. Merely that this is going to be an inconvenience for them.
And are those with budding romantic feelings for another still permitted to invite the person of their affection on dates? Is that taboo? It feels so very wrong.
... Maybe I'll use the pocketwatch and forget all of this. This is criminal of me.
[action : various cities]
[Eliot has gone off on a self-help love quest, because all of this really bugs him. He's not sure how valid his emotions are, given that his personality is a temporary front for his "library self." He's been stopping in book stores and convenience stores, even stopping in grocery stores, to pick up those trashy teenage gossip magazines. Particularly anything that promises to explain the social etiquette of modern romance.
He's also been picking up trashy magazines of a less appropriate variety. You'll know he picked up and flipped to a scandalous article when you hear him scream in public and hastily close the magazine, glowing red from embarrassment.]
o-oh... oh my goodness...! Modern publishing is shameless...!
no subject
[Just going to point that out there while she tries not to hunt him down and strangle him.]
You are zhe single most stubborn child I haf ever taken a liking to und zhat's saying something considering zhe ozher children I haf...
[She growled softly. Okay, she might not be ready to admit to anyone just yet that yes she has a motherly side, even if it does tend to peek out around Eliot.]
Und vat if I started asking to haf 'tea' vith him? Vould you allow it?
no subject
I like Winry... That's... close to whole, right?
[That earns a frown.] You would be lying. No one actually wants to have tea with him. That's part of why he went away.
no subject
Falling in love vith a person isn't.. exactly how you become a whole person.
[Except, with Rip and Augustine...They do complete each other rather well, just like her and Namur do so maybe Rip's not exactly the right person to ask that question to...]
Vould I? I'm hardly your typical person now am I? I might enjoy his rude and gruff behavior.
no subject
... I don't think that I want you to, then.
[ugh, this is hard to admit. Especially to Rip.]
Even if I'm not whole, I'm still here. This version of me is still "me." And I'd like to be the side people prefer.
no subject
You know I'd razher see you as a whole person zhan separated like zhis.
[She grumbles under her breath and swears she's not parenting material despite feeling like that's exactly what she's doing right now.]
Und don't give up on liking zomeone. It may not make you a whole person like you vant, but... it iz still vorth pursuing. If it vasn't.. I vouldn't haf Augustine.
no subject
[He insists this much more quietly this time.]
And I don’t need your advice. If all you’re going to do is lecture me and bully me, I’m leavinng.
no subject
[At least, not anymore anyway.]
Vant it or not, I'm giving it anyvay.
[She huffs softly and grumbles under her breath.]
Like I said, you are zhe single most stubborn child I've ever had zhe displeasure of caring for.
[She means that lovingly, honest. This is Rip's way of saying, she's your mother damn it. Now listen.]
no subject
It’s been working for 300 years. And since I don’t remember life before Genessia, I don’t miss it. I don’t know if I’ve lost any friends here either, so that’s working too.
I don’t even know who I’d be if I combined both personalities. It wouldn’t be “me” anymore. I’d be some weird half grouchy mix who hates everything.
no subject
It vould still be you, just.. more of you to contend vith und probably healthier. Besides, you only 'hate everyzhing' if you make yourself do zo. I doubt zhat vill happen und just because zhis has 'vorked' for 300 years, doesn't mean it's healthy.
Hell, zhe fact your memories before Genessia fading tells me zhat is iz not a good zhing.
[She draws a deep breath for a moment.]
So actually listen to me for once.
[Listen to your mother Eliot.]
no subject
[He really is stubborn, as he huffs with annoyance and takes out his pocket watch. As... a threat? Who knows what's going through his mind.]
Dad-- Augustine understand why I'm like this.
no subject
[And she's just as stubborn as she watches him take out that cursed pocket watch. Admittedly, with her temper rising with this conversation, she might be admitting to things she doesn't want to.]
Your fazher... Augustine coddles you. I'd like to say as your.. mozher, I haf more sense zhen zhe two of you put together despite how much I love Auggie and apparently care for you.
no subject
He growls lightly with growing annoyance.]
I never asked for your help. You're always telling me I'm wrong and looking down on me. But I'm not. I know what I'm doing and it's not changing!
[Nowwww to quickly hang up, run home, and lock every door in the house.]
no subject
Eliot, get out here. Ve need to talk, face to face.
no subject
Fortunately, Eliot was slightly prepared. He knew that she would probably find her way in eventually, somehow, so he had already come up with defensive measures: Pocket watch use.
He's settled in the living room with his Pokemon, a log for his business, and wine. Yes, wine. He's already miserable enough to have poured a glass for safety.]
Took you long enough. [Also, with terrible manners and posture. He's leaning over the arm of the sofa chair, with his feet up on the side table. His Crobat hangs upside-down from the ceiling, having mistaken his poor manners for a game.]
You still bitter?
no subject
Annoyed, not bitter. Zhere's a difference.
no subject
[He doesn't immediately turn around to face her. When he does, it's mostly so that he can set the business ledger on the coffee table between them.]
Why waste your time coming here? You're not going to change my mind.
no subject
[She sighed softly and just observed him as he tried to busy himself with his ledger.]
Because I still haf to try. I don't agree vith vat you're doing to yourself. I zuppose it's... part of caring about you as strange az zhat sounds.
[She shifted uneasily in her seat.]
...I'm hardly mozher material. At least, zhat's vat I keep telling myself.
no subject
She tied me down and brutally murdered me. But we've already talked about that mother. I'm in no hurry for a replacement.
[Eliot picks the book out of the air.] You don't agree, but I've never asked for your approval. "I" don't care about anything you or Augustine want for me. It's the other me who still thinks a family could be fun, or that relationships are ever worth it. I've become bored of those. So if you're here to take down my walls with familial bonding, don't waste your breath or my time.
no subject
I haf no intention of physically harming you or your ozher half. I'm...not sure vat kind of mozher I am anymore, but, I vouldn't actually hurt you.
[Not anymore. Not after her trip through the dreamdocks.]
I don't view families az a vaste of time. Zhey are protection und support.. if you haf zhe right kind of family. Augustine und I zimply vant to look out for you, even if you don't vish it. Zhat's... vat parents are supposed to do. Zhey are supposed to care for and look out for zheir children.
[She sighed softly.]
...Look, I'm zorry for my... brutality und sledgehammer bluntness on my opinions. Vhere you haf zhe option of forgetting memories, I don't und I'm still dealing vith three vorlds und nearly a decade vorth of zhem I didn't haf vhen ve first met. Personally, I enjoy zhe little family unit ve haf, even if it iz a little dysfunctional.
Besides, I'm just as stubborn az you are. Telling me zhat attempting family bonding von't stop me from trying.
no subject
[Eliot closes his eyes as the book drops into his lap, leaning back so that he's staring at the floor instead of the ceiling.]
But I can't. This memory of mine is permanent. I can remember every family I've "found," and all of the love I've experienced. In every moment, I remember the fresh pain of loss, of betrayal, of pain, right next to the love and trust, and happiness.
[He opens his eyes, but he's not looking at Rip. Maybe his eyes are, but his mind is struggling to find the 'now' and focus on it. It's also very difficult not to cry when all of those memories plague him, so he picks up that book and moves it into his face. He needs a distraction, before he snaps.]
I'm tired.
no subject
Would she even get the opportunity to live that long? That was the other thing that plagued her at times.]
...I've found it useful to learn from memories like zhose. Zhe painful ones und zhe good ones.
[She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose under her glasses. Already she could feel a headache coming on.]
I cannot begin to understand half of vat you experience vhenever you remember. Or vhy it iz easier for you to be separated like zhis. To me it does not make any sense.
I vill admit in two vorlds, I vas completely different from vat I am now, but, zhe experiences zhere are vat haf shaped me into.. zhis. Both zhe insanity of loosing everyzhing.. und zhe shattering of my entire vorld from making a stupid mistake.
[Rip closed her eyes as the pounding in her head started from remembering those times.]
...You're not zhe only one zhat's tired, Eliot. I miss my daughter, my lovers.. my pets from zhose times. But, I know I can never haf zhem back. In zhe end, I am alvays zhe one left alone.
But, I am attempting to change zhat. So.. vhy don't you attempt to change? I don't understand vhy you don't.
no subject
When she's finished, Eliot sits up again. But this time, he's preparing to read his book.]
Because I have learned. Plenty. [He flips through, looking for a particular page. Hardly looking at Rip anymore.] The other me is stupid, but he can be happy. He doesn't miss his lovers, or wonder which of the twenty-some we've had is his 'true love.' Actually, he seems pretty hung up on the idea that Winry is anything special.
She's just Ophelia, but not dead.
[Eliot reaches for his wine at the thought of Ophelia.] But it's nice to be in love for a while. It's fun to think you've found something special and lasting. You can build upon your fading memories, but I can't. I'm always going to remember that I'm married to seven women, and I've had children, and I've watched them die. But if I remembered every cycle every time, I wouldn't have had seven happy lifetimes. I would have been unhappy and grieving, and hateful.
[He looks up and whistles. Amelie, his Crobat, unfolds a wing and drops his pocket watch onto the table between them.]
Being stupid is fine. He'll learn over time. He'll live a happy family life with the two of you, and probably stumble, but he'll be happy. And the time you spend with him will mean something. I'll get to remember it fondly when he gets reset.
no subject
I see... I zhink I'm starting to understand.
[She sighed softly and closed her eyes for a moment.]
For him to be happy, ignorance really iz bliss. Especially, if it allows him to haf zhe good times for you to cherish.
[She fell quiet for a moment.]
Zhe vay you two are separated really is zhe only vay you... him, can function. Isn't it.
no subject
[He isn’t really. This isn’t something that’s fun to understand, and he’s sure that the revelation will change the way she looks at him. No one else in Genessia knows much about Eliot’s other lives.]
Then if we’re done here, I think I’ll leave. Thanks for having “tea” with me. [He turns to face her again, only to psychically make his pocket watch levitate into the air again. He’s getting ready to twist the dial with his powers too, but first turns back to his wine.]
Let’s not make this a repeated event. I don’t really have much purpose in Genessia anyway. Might as well hit his head and make his amnesia permanent, for all the good that I do here.
no subject
I vould say you don’t haf a purpose. You just hafnt found it yet. But, I vill try not to make zhis a repeat unless I need a better understanding of somzhing.
[She’s trying and at least Rip knows how to keep secrets.]
Und it seems like I haf a lot of apologizing und making zhings up to zhe both of you. So,I apologize for my... stubbornness. I shouldn't haf been zo pushy und insistent zhat I vas right.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)