genessia | 19th Healing | The Disappeared

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19th Healing | The Disappeared

[[ Video ]]

She hasn't been around for a while, but... Eva-chan is gone.

And this time around, I feel like a lot of people have disappeared.

[ Normally, Konoka tried to hide her negative emotions, but by the look on her fact that was an impossibility now. She hadn't really done anything for Valentine's Day, but any thoughts of making up for that went out the window. So Konoka's grave face paints the video screen. ]

There's been so many people I've met throughout my time here, and so many are gone.

But life keeps going. New people show up. It's kind of like... the cycle of life, but sped up.

[ It seemed like she just now reached that conclusion. ]

It's weird. It feels unfair, and to be honest, I don't know what to do... outside of keep doing what I normally do. But it still hurts from seeing the impact. I guess that's all I can really say.

[ And Konoka shuts off the video. ]

[[ Action | Fayren ]]

Konoka... will largely just take to staying around Amatsu and her store. Now that she's no longer a deputy, she has a lot more free time. At Amatsu, Konoka may be seen at one of the lounging areas, idly staring into space or petting one of her Pokemon, who seem to be pretty aware of her conflicted misery. At her store though, she's focusing hardcore on paperwork and spells. Hey, just because a mentor is gone doesn't mean that she can slack off on studies. And seeing how things are mean that she needed to get a healer's system up and running sooner rather than later. She'll greet anyone with a smile and help, but anyone who knows her might see that she may come off mildly distracted.

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Sadness begets sadness so it was inevitable that Konoka's feelings would attract a certain little youkai. She had been hiding out at the Amatsu inn over the weekend trying to feed on the joy and excitement of the people there. To... limited effect.

But she couldn't very well ignore a sad person coming in and crashing the metaphorical party.

She approached Konoka while she was in one of the lounges, tugging on her sleeve. "Hey! Miss? Can you see me? Can you hear me?" It would work eventually.

The first to notice the little youkai wasn't Konoka, but her Umbreon, Yuunagi. However, it was just a few brief seconds, because by the time it could react, Konoka had already noticed the tugging on her sleeve. She blinked wearily as she realized that she had zoned out, and turned to see the small girl who had been clamoring for her attention.

"I can, I can," Konoka answered her insistence by echoing back at her. It made her smile, if brief and somberly. She realized that this 'little girl' might actually be anything but, though she did look faintly familiar too... "I'm sorry, I just stared at the ceiling and lost track of time."

"It's cold." She frowned, looking down and reaching out to gently pet the Umbreon. "Like a steel ball dropped onto thin ice. Cracks and wobbling and rippling thunder traveling up your legs." More of her riddles though this one seemed a little bit more clear than most.

She tilted her head, third eye swaying restlessly. "What's wrong?"

[Not one to rely totally on feelings, Ted's checked the slab at Memoria Park to confirm the spring cleaning Genessia's done. Farewell, chaff, may you not drag any wheat along with you.

An unkind judgment, perhaps, but Ted's pattern recognition couldn't let the departed off as charitably as everyone else does. In a way he admires the generous agnosticism people like Konoka had about the whole thing. They really believed they had no hand in their own fates. Ted wishes he could agree.]

Eheh, aside from attributing "cyclical" to life for an adjective, you echo my sentiments. Sorry to hear that, Konoka.

[Not that he had any interaction with Eva beyond the casual. She didn't seem like a good person, even in the colloquial way, but then Ted didn't exactly hang out with angels either. He knew how mere familiarity was all it took.]

Not a bad resolution, either. I'm ever your patron.

[For what that's worth. Ted thought the world still needed saving, after all. waiting and focusing on that goal was what kept him going in the wake of transient relation. He might stop in today, if only for custom's sake.]

Yuunagi is at first a bit apprehensive, but since Koishi doesn't seem to be a threat to Konoka, she lets Koishi pet her.

"Cold?" Konoka tilted her head, confusion faintly visible on her face. It was only after she asked if she was alright did context slowly slip in. "I... well, a lot of people are gone and... I feel too drained to feel anything. Other than being sad I guess. Something tells me I need to still do stuff but my mind and body feel like they're... not on speaking terms."

Maybe.

[ Once again, never quite sure what to do with Ted. There's that ever present feeling of 'judgment' in his words, but never is he deceptive. At least in matters of philosophy, anyway. ]

But that is a good point too.

Konoka-san...

I don't think you have to do what you normally do... Things change when your loved ones leave. I think it's okay for you to change a little bit too, at least for a while...

Are you taking care of you?

I guess it is hard to know what to do when people you know leave.

[Honestly, Takeru had no clue what to do when his brother and recently within the last month or so their roommate left. Really he had just been ignoring it until a load more people have mentioned a lot of people who have left.]

But I'm not sure trying to do the same thing really helps, either.

Mavis pushes the door of Konoka's store and waves gently at Konoka as she sees her.

"Hey, Konoka! How are you today?"

Koishi just floated closer, her third eye drifting over to nudge at Konoka's shoulder. She didn't really have any comfort to give but she did at least understand where Konoka was coming from.

"Yeah. A lot of people are gone. I've been here for five different season cycles. Or I will have when this one ends. Everyone will go away eventually. But it will always be sad no matter what."

Satou-han?

[ Konoka is actually a little surprised by the question, mostly because she hadn't thought of it. Maybe some part of her was really impacted more than she thought. ]

I...

I don't know. I'm lonely.

"Yeah, that's true." Konoka said, looking up but also keeping an eye on Koishi. "Just because you're expecting it doesn't make it any easier."

She... sort of knew Eva wasn't around and this had merely confirmed what she suspected. But such a massive list of the disappeared, once she had gone to visit the wall one day, had hit her harder than she imagined.

"When Secchan was gone, I cried. Eva was there." Konoka said. "But now Eva's gone too. There were lots of friends I had and then they're all gone. And I'm not the only one who's felt this way. In a way, I've been feeling much lonelier for a while."

Maybe it doesn't, but don't you think people need some assurance that things will be alright?

I mean, I don't want to toss away my emotions or anything, but I've already done my mourning. I don't wanna keep moping.

"Oh Mavis-han!"

Konoka hadn't really dwelt on her emotions, but she was actually pretty glad to see Mavis.

"I... well I'm not fine, but I'm still going! I've largely just been winding down with my Pokemon when I'm alone. To be honest, I'm feeling better since you're visiting."

Mm...

[Satou remembers how lonely she was when Bakugou left.]

Do you want to get tea together? You can tell me about Eva-san...

Sure. I think it would help.

Where would you want to meet?

Koishi was just nodding, a bit more focused than usual on Konoka. "I'm in a similar place. Miss Satsuki is gone. She was the very first person to greet me when I came here. And before that was Luke. He vanished and Miss White was there to help me stay focused."

She looked down at her shoes and then back up. "I can't feel loneliness. I can't feel anything at all, actually. But I can sense your feelings. It's probably how I would feel too if I could. It's familiar and hollow and full of coarse glass and ice shards and I'm sorry."

Mavis comes closer to her and her expression softens. "As always," Of course, Konoka is still going. She's a strong girl. Mavis noticed immediately. There's a reason why she'd insisted on her moving to Fayren to become her Deputy Guardian at the time.

That doesn't mean she has to act strong all the time.

"Of course. I did promise I would visit, didn't I?" She raises a little bag she's been holding behind her back. "Think you could take a break? I brought some cake for us to share."

"You... don't feel?" Konoka tilted her head. That felt most curious to her.

"But you seem to recognize how I feel. Is that because you're a youkai or because something in your mind is... detached?" Konoka didn't feel comfortable saying that, since she didn't want to imply anything was wrong with Koishi, but she had no better words.

"Cake? That sounds great!" Mavis could probably tell that this was weighing on Konoka due to her more subdued reaction; Konoka was glad, but it only showed in her eyes, she didn't bounce in excitement like she normally would have. "I don't mind taking a break..."

But Mavis has also been a guiding hand for her, especially since she started with her deputy run. She wouldn't know what to do without her.

Konoka set aside a table that the both of them could sit at.

Koishi's third eye nudge Konoka again, open a sliver. "I'm a youkai of the subconscious. I can reflect what you feel. But that doesn't mean I understand it or even have feelings of my own. Apparently that's what happens when you remove your own mind-reading abilities. But I'm fine now."

That didn't exactly sound 'fine' but she also didn't seem to be in any pain from it.

"Loneliness unpleasant is a good thing to feel right now. It makes you want to reach out to other people and make more friends. Otherwise you might just sit alone and miss out on things."

Edited 2019-02-19 13:30 (UTC)

It was definitely not the level of excitement Mavis was used to from Konoka. But it was okay, Mavis could see in her eyes she was happy to see her and she had no problem being enthusiastic for too.

"It's better than great. Wait until you see it!" She opens a cardboard box and reveals one of her favorite treats: strawberry cheesecake. It was undoubtedly coming from a bakery or most likely Mokona's Cafe. Mavis was fairly good at baking but not _that_ good.

"I took strawberry milk to go with it, too!" She two bottles with straws, and a knife and forks on the table next to the cake.

Edited 2019-02-19 14:51 (UTC)

Konoka paused at that. It sure didn't sound 'fine' to her, but there was nothing she could actually do about it. She'd just take Koishi's word for it.

"I see. I need to hang out with someone." Konoka laid back, thought a moment, and then something else hit her. "You feel loneliness too? Or, is it that you're reflecting it off me?" She wasn't entirely sure how Koishi worked, but she was picking up on it. "We should get rid of that loneliness together, right?"

With the table set aside and the cake and treats laid out, Konoka could feel a little more excited over what Mavis brought over. And she brought over a lot! The cheesecake looked mouth watering.

Fortunately, she wasn't quite at that point, so she settled down and didn't eat until Mavis settled just opposite of her.

"Gosh, you really prepared!" Konoka marveled. "I don't think I've eaten anything cake-like in the past two weeks!"

"Well... I know you're lonely because you said you're lonely. I can feel something like melancholy but I dunno what it is specifically. Just what you told me. Either way it's delicious so I don't really mind." Okay so she was feeding on the feelings?

"You shouldn't stay lonely though. It's not good for people to stay lonely. I can help you if you really want. I like feeling joy from people."

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19th Healing | The Disappeared

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