Video
[The phone's angled oddly, displaying the damaged head of a stuffed bear. Somehow its very exposed stuffing still held together.]
Like this?
Yup, that's perfect buddy! Thanks. Ahem! My good and only friend Ted just wanted to say that if you're having a doll problem, look him up! He's got a surefire method to keep those jerks off your back, guaranteed! Of course, you'd never do that to me, would you?
[It turned its fuzzy head to look up along the arm propping the phone. It received a mournful, soft "no".]
Course ya wouldn't! We're way past distrust in our relationship. Besides, if you did, I'd set off my necrobomb! What's a necrobomb, you're probably wondering? Glad you asked! It's a lot like a normal bomb, what with the huge explosion and the death. Only this one's magic, so I can set it off whenever!
...Just kidding!
["You are?", a far-off Ted asked with reluctant hope.]
For sure! My bomb's much worse. You'd only die if you're lucky! What'll probably happen is you being blown to bits, only for those bits to come together into some hideous, gelatinous mass of undeath where you silently yearn for an end that'll never come! So if anybody has any bright ideas about separating true blue friends like us, have another think on it, why don'tcha? Who knows how many casualties you'd cause! Anything else you wanted to say, my beary best friend?
[There's some mournful mumbling.]
Okay! Marc, Star, Uai, and some other losers that aren't worth your time, he says he's sorry he can't show up for lessons for a while. Man, what a kidder! Don't you worry Ted, we're gonna have so much fun you won't ever wanna leave! Cause, ya know. If you did then there'd be a whole lotta corpses to answer for, y'know?
That's all; bye!
Action - Everglade
[So long as Ted's stuck in Everglade, he's doing his usual: altruism and avoiding people. He's happy to stuff any unwanted dolls into his personal voidspace; his own, however, likes to be handheld and entertained. The miserable pair are plodding along one foggy road in particular, when the deranged bear stops walking.]
You're so funny, Ted! Tell me a joke.
...Want to hear a joke about construction?
Sure!
I'm still working on it.
Heeheeeheehee! Good one!
[The bear's rolling on its back like the Pillsbury Doughboy. Maybe you can give him a brief respite from his hell. Just don't make the bear jealous.]
[The phone's angled oddly, displaying the damaged head of a stuffed bear. Somehow its very exposed stuffing still held together.]
Like this?
Yup, that's perfect buddy! Thanks. Ahem! My good and only friend Ted just wanted to say that if you're having a doll problem, look him up! He's got a surefire method to keep those jerks off your back, guaranteed! Of course, you'd never do that to me, would you?
[It turned its fuzzy head to look up along the arm propping the phone. It received a mournful, soft "no".]
Course ya wouldn't! We're way past distrust in our relationship. Besides, if you did, I'd set off my necrobomb! What's a necrobomb, you're probably wondering? Glad you asked! It's a lot like a normal bomb, what with the huge explosion and the death. Only this one's magic, so I can set it off whenever!
...Just kidding!
["You are?", a far-off Ted asked with reluctant hope.]
For sure! My bomb's much worse. You'd only die if you're lucky! What'll probably happen is you being blown to bits, only for those bits to come together into some hideous, gelatinous mass of undeath where you silently yearn for an end that'll never come! So if anybody has any bright ideas about separating true blue friends like us, have another think on it, why don'tcha? Who knows how many casualties you'd cause! Anything else you wanted to say, my beary best friend?
[There's some mournful mumbling.]
Okay! Marc, Star, Uai, and some other losers that aren't worth your time, he says he's sorry he can't show up for lessons for a while. Man, what a kidder! Don't you worry Ted, we're gonna have so much fun you won't ever wanna leave! Cause, ya know. If you did then there'd be a whole lotta corpses to answer for, y'know?
That's all; bye!
Action - Everglade
[So long as Ted's stuck in Everglade, he's doing his usual: altruism and avoiding people. He's happy to stuff any unwanted dolls into his personal voidspace; his own, however, likes to be handheld and entertained. The miserable pair are plodding along one foggy road in particular, when the deranged bear stops walking.]
You're so funny, Ted! Tell me a joke.
...Want to hear a joke about construction?
Sure!
I'm still working on it.
Heeheeeheehee! Good one!
[The bear's rolling on its back like the Pillsbury Doughboy. Maybe you can give him a brief respite from his hell. Just don't make the bear jealous.]
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