Roman Torchwick (
maybeitsmaybelline) wrote in
genessia2015-02-15 11:45 pm
4th Heist- Backdated to Feb 14th- Voice OTA/Action closed to Gintoki
Part 1- action closed to Gintoki
[Roman doesn't do sappy holidays as a general rule, but this time he's trapped. He'd used culture shock as an excuse to ignore the whole Chirstmas debacle but Neo had gotten pretty into it. She didn't say anything directly, but he's pretty sure that if he misses Valentine's Day too he's going to be in a world of hurt. He isn't going all out but he's lifted her a nice necklace, gotten some quality wine and chocolate, and stashed an unreasonable number of roses to decorate their room while she was out.
The trouble is, making dinner reservations is tough for a crime lord. Even if you use an alias there's always the chance that someone will recognize your voice, and next thing you know you've got a date with the cops. The trick is to get someone else to make your reservations, then show up and surprise them. Sure, they'll file a report about it later, but no one wants to ruin date night for an armed criminal.
Now he just needs to get Gintoki to make the reservations. He slips out while Neo's still sleeping and lets himself into Gintoki's room, throwing the door open.]
Rise and shine, manservant! It's-- son of a--
[He cuts off in a growl as he steps on an arrow. An arrow! Of all things! Sure, he probably should've changed out of his PJs and put on some shoes before he came down, but who expects their servants to keep arrows around?]
Would you consider maybe not leaving weapons out on the floor?
Part 2- anonymous voice post to the network, OTA!
[This post isn't just anonymous, it's also been put through a voice filter. Even if he wasn't a wanted criminal, this is way too embarrassing to let himself be recognized.]
Good morning, fellow citizens! In the spirit of the holiday, I've got a question for all of you.
Say you met that special someone. Say you made a really awful first impression-- did something embarrassing, accidentally insulted them, maybe threatened their life, that sort of thing. How would you go about making it up to them?
[That's the sort of problem everyone has, right? ]
[Roman doesn't do sappy holidays as a general rule, but this time he's trapped. He'd used culture shock as an excuse to ignore the whole Chirstmas debacle but Neo had gotten pretty into it. She didn't say anything directly, but he's pretty sure that if he misses Valentine's Day too he's going to be in a world of hurt. He isn't going all out but he's lifted her a nice necklace, gotten some quality wine and chocolate, and stashed an unreasonable number of roses to decorate their room while she was out.
The trouble is, making dinner reservations is tough for a crime lord. Even if you use an alias there's always the chance that someone will recognize your voice, and next thing you know you've got a date with the cops. The trick is to get someone else to make your reservations, then show up and surprise them. Sure, they'll file a report about it later, but no one wants to ruin date night for an armed criminal.
Now he just needs to get Gintoki to make the reservations. He slips out while Neo's still sleeping and lets himself into Gintoki's room, throwing the door open.]
Rise and shine, manservant! It's-- son of a--
[He cuts off in a growl as he steps on an arrow. An arrow! Of all things! Sure, he probably should've changed out of his PJs and put on some shoes before he came down, but who expects their servants to keep arrows around?]
Would you consider maybe not leaving weapons out on the floor?
Part 2- anonymous voice post to the network, OTA!
[This post isn't just anonymous, it's also been put through a voice filter. Even if he wasn't a wanted criminal, this is way too embarrassing to let himself be recognized.]
Good morning, fellow citizens! In the spirit of the holiday, I've got a question for all of you.
Say you met that special someone. Say you made a really awful first impression-- did something embarrassing, accidentally insulted them, maybe threatened their life, that sort of thing. How would you go about making it up to them?
[That's the sort of problem everyone has, right? ]

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That's not mine. I don't use arrows. I have horrible aim.
video text;; private;
So, in a not-so-literal sense, she's speechless and just stares at him with white eyes.]
And what is this all of the sudden...!?
anon text;
Anon Text
How the hell do you crush on someone then casually threaten their life??? Like, I'm trying to figure out the kind of logical failure involved in this, and it's boggling my mind.
[Pidonus... Would probably be even harsher if she knew this was Roman. Just from her limited sample.]
Video- private
What's what all of a sudden?
[If he's really really lucky, he can convince her it wasn't him... If not, he's beyond screwed.]
Anon voice
Anon voice
[That makes everything better, right? ...Or not. See, this is why he hates everyone. Liking people makes life terribly complicated.]
Look, we just got off on the wrong foot. It happens. I'm being the bigger man here admitting I was wrong about them, so that's got to count for something, right?
[Pidonus, meet Roman Logic.]
Anon text
Well you obviously already know what not to do, that's a start.
Video- private
I demand an explanation for this sudden...this! [Tiny arms flailing about.]
Re: Anon voice
This is important, because this might indicate a particularly hopeless crush kind of situation.
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Wait, Gintoki said something didn't he? RIGHT. ARROW. Roman glances down at it, then back at him with a vaguely panicked look.]
Uh. [Come on, idiot, he isn't some lovesick schoolboy! Say something!] Must've been... housekeeping. [Really? Housekeeping? He could do better than that!]Looks like I need to have a talk with them.
[He should probably get on with asking about the reservations, but he's too busy staring. This is bizarre.]
Re: Video- private
Fine! This isn't exactly the way I wanted to tell you, but if you insist, fine! I think I'm in love with your stupid Manservant! But don't go getting any ideas, because I still love you too, ok!? Can't a guy love two people at once?!
[It's incredibly rare for him to say 'I love you' out loud, so maybe that will get him out of trouble? ...Maybe? Ok, probably not. Shit.]
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[Not that he's getting defensive or anything. No, that would be undignified.
Kind of like asking the whole city for relationship advice after getting put under a love spell.]no subject
[That's an immediate and strong response. The only old enemies he has here are a bunch of little girls and my god he does not want to even think about that.]
Noooo, nothing like that. I hadn't even met them before last week.
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Still, that's a pretty tough situation to be in. To say the least.
Video- private
You pick NOW to tell me your true feelings yet have the gall to set me on a pedestal with that...that ugly frizzy-- THAT THING?!
Fine, you can love him, too but only if I'M involved. That is our deal!
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[He was clearly gearing up for a good fight, but he cuts off mid-complaint. Did... did he hear that right?]
Wait. You mean you're ok with this?
[The words are steeped in suspicion. This is definitely a trap, he's just not sure how.]
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Ooooh, sweetheart, if you want to see a real trainwreck--
[Wait, no, he can't make casual threats without potentially revealing his identity. Ugh. Playing nice is such a drag.]
Sorry to disappoint, but if you think I'm letting this play out in public then you've got another think coming.
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[He never should've posted this, really. Nothing good comes of consulting these plebeians.]
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Would you like to find a private place to continue this?
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...That was sarcasm. If you wanted to meet up, you probably should've suggested it before that bit about sitting back and watching the train wreck.
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I just thought that you actually wanted to defend yourself. I was giving you the opportunity to do that.
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NO.
But there's no way I'm sharing you, either. So you suffer both or none at all.
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Though if they're heroically-minded and you're not, or visa-versa... Could be rough.
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You don't think there's any other way? I'm allergic to apologies. I break out in hives. I mean, I've got a nice dinner booked, and a bunch of fancy chocolates, and all the finer things that are supposed to be romantic. That's kind of like an apology, right?
[Never mind that it's all supposed to be for Neo. He'll deal with that later.]
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I knew there was a reason I liked you. I can work with that.
Keep your schedule open tonight. I've got a little surprise for the two of you.
[Assuming that Gintoki comes around, but he will. Roman is irresistible.]
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Why the hell are you staring at me? Is there something on my face?
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