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NEWSPAPER - SUNDAY EDITION (sorry the power went out last night so I couldn't get this up!)
[ Did you subscribe to The Genessia Tribune? Did you even remotely wish you had a newspaper or some other form of media to refer to for news, weather, and current events? Then you're in luck! There's a paperboy riding through the streets of Genessia flinging newspapers onto doorsteps or, if you're unlucky, through your window. Even remote locations in the other cities will still get a paper if one of the residents ever wanted one. The Paperboy is just that dedicated. ]
[ And if you're one of the following people, and you happen to subscribe to the newspaper, the Paperboy may or may not have flung the newspaper through that person's window, at the person, and/or broke something in the area: Maika, Blaze, Braga, Charlotte, Agron, Nasir, Neo, Darklaw, Mewtwo. ]
Singles Ads
Are you a lonely sadsack? Maybe placing an ad will change your luck! Send in a submission to see your ad in next week's paper! Names will not be shown, so be sure to include your contact number. Who knows? You might meet someone dreamy! Or a creepy stalker! Try your luck today!
Nova City in Trouble!
Something's happening in Nova City! Unfortunately, due to it, we weren't able to get any live information about it. We'll continue sending reporters in to gather information, but here's what we know so far:
The power and communications are all out in Nova City. Rioting is busy on the streets, and local authorities and repair people have tried to get into the power facilities to no avail! Help has been called for, but the power company's CEO says that without people who can defeat the physical security robots, break in past typical security, hack into the system and program the generator to power down, and find and remove whatever is causing the abnormalities in the system, they won't be able to fix it.
Nova Power is experiencing great scrutiny for these mishaps, but they are unable to comment on how this happened as no one can seem to get near the generators. The CEO stated that if it is something his resignation will improve upon, he will take full responsibility once they are able to discover just whose fault this is after further investigation. Stay tuned!
Mysterious Doorway - A Rabbit Hole to Walk Down!?
After the mysterious relocation of the Bay, upon its return a new doorway appeared toward the back. No one can seem to get into it, but it also seems unharmful. The architecture appears to be largely composed of old wood on the frame and it looks like some kind of rock cave and staircase on the way down.
Guardian Terms Are Coming Up- Election Watch 2015 Begins!
Our City Guardians have done a great job, wouldn't you agree? We certainly think so, but times change. We're looking forward to the new election cycle and seeing new candidates start cropping up. We'll be watching around the cities for news on who's interested and will announce to you as soon as we know ourselves! Keep an eye out, there's new leadership on the horizon.
Ted Talksing -- THE FINAL EDITION!
Dear Ted
I've heard rumors about the new area in Nova City. You know, the one with the glittering water and the big hole in the middle? They say that if you catch one of the stars, you'll relive a memory; like you were really there. I mean, I'm not saying I'm dumb enough to believe something like that, but hypothetically speaking, would that be a good way to spend a day off?
Sincerely
Skeptical slacker
Dear Ted
Boy, it seems like there's a new party every week! And I just have so many questions. How should I dress? What should I say? How can I mingle successfully? How do you play all those wonderful party games?
Signed,
Party Newbie
And with that, unfortunately our dear Ted has quit! Look forward to seeing what new column we'll have next. We wish Ted good luck in his future ventures and thank him for his advice column while he was with the Tribune.
Job Listings
Need a job? Check out a few jobs open right here in Genessia and its neighboring cities!
Bounties
Your Weather Forecast
[ OOC: Want to submit anything to the newspaper? Reply to this comment with the subject line as your title and include any information you want to be sure is in next Sunday's newspaper! This includes news, gossip, singles ads, business advertisements, job listings, bounties, and anything else you want in the newspaper.
FOR BOUNTIES: Reply to this comment with either a claim or a log (every 3 claims must include a log). Feel free to team up, or even fail to deliver the bounty. Please note that whoever goes after the bounty is in charge of writing the NPCs involved, but feel free to ask the mod for any tips if you like. First come first serve on claims unless you haven't turned in a log for every 3 bounties. ]
[ And if you're one of the following people, and you happen to subscribe to the newspaper, the Paperboy may or may not have flung the newspaper through that person's window, at the person, and/or broke something in the area: Maika, Blaze, Braga, Charlotte, Agron, Nasir, Neo, Darklaw, Mewtwo. ]
Singles Ads
Bum Luck
Me -- trying to sleep on the bus station bench, pleading with you to give me a cigarette; you --choking on my odor, tripping over your purse trying to get away; at the last moment, our eyes meeting. Yours were blue. Can I have a dollar?
NSFL (Not Safe for Life)
Hot Dog Looking For A Bun 20yo, MWM, good looking, looks better naked, 5'11, fit, brown/green, WLTM fast, fun, and furious, SF, 18+, who also looks great naked for kinky, erotic sex.
Too Honest
Insensitive 47-year-old lounge lizard (male), seeks woman with energy to suffer periods of self-indulgence. Offers in return good sangria and complete lack of interest in sport.
Are you a lonely sadsack? Maybe placing an ad will change your luck! Send in a submission to see your ad in next week's paper! Names will not be shown, so be sure to include your contact number. Who knows? You might meet someone dreamy! Or a creepy stalker! Try your luck today!
Nova City in Trouble!
Something's happening in Nova City! Unfortunately, due to it, we weren't able to get any live information about it. We'll continue sending reporters in to gather information, but here's what we know so far:
The power and communications are all out in Nova City. Rioting is busy on the streets, and local authorities and repair people have tried to get into the power facilities to no avail! Help has been called for, but the power company's CEO says that without people who can defeat the physical security robots, break in past typical security, hack into the system and program the generator to power down, and find and remove whatever is causing the abnormalities in the system, they won't be able to fix it.
Nova Power is experiencing great scrutiny for these mishaps, but they are unable to comment on how this happened as no one can seem to get near the generators. The CEO stated that if it is something his resignation will improve upon, he will take full responsibility once they are able to discover just whose fault this is after further investigation. Stay tuned!
Mysterious Doorway - A Rabbit Hole to Walk Down!?
After the mysterious relocation of the Bay, upon its return a new doorway appeared toward the back. No one can seem to get into it, but it also seems unharmful. The architecture appears to be largely composed of old wood on the frame and it looks like some kind of rock cave and staircase on the way down.
Guardian Terms Are Coming Up- Election Watch 2015 Begins!
Our City Guardians have done a great job, wouldn't you agree? We certainly think so, but times change. We're looking forward to the new election cycle and seeing new candidates start cropping up. We'll be watching around the cities for news on who's interested and will announce to you as soon as we know ourselves! Keep an eye out, there's new leadership on the horizon.
Ted Talk
Dear Ted
I've heard rumors about the new area in Nova City. You know, the one with the glittering water and the big hole in the middle? They say that if you catch one of the stars, you'll relive a memory; like you were really there. I mean, I'm not saying I'm dumb enough to believe something like that, but hypothetically speaking, would that be a good way to spend a day off?
Sincerely
Skeptical slacker
Dear slacker
Unless the memory contains the password necessary to access a nuclear silo, thus securing the world from destruction, I say "no".
I have nothing against memories, save for one thing: they're not true. In fact, of all mental phenomena, I believe they may be the second worst liars of the bunch. One step above hallucinations, one step below dreams.
For you see, a memory is a funny thing. We may liken it merely to a hazy glimpse of the past. And I greatly respect the past. Not as much as the present, but it's a close contender, because it once was real. It shines with the rays of actuality.
Memories are a hazy distortion of that light. They are colored throughout, their louder parts exaggerated, and their quieter parts eclipsed. How many arguments have been born merely because a recollection did not derive quite as spotlessly as it should have?
I do not deny that some memories are pleasant. It would be careless of me to not mention that some memories are painful. In neither case will they be fully real; a cartoon, at best, of what was.
So please, do not waste a day of rest wallowing in perverse pasts. If you are so hungry for memories, consider using that time instead to make new ones. That, at least, will give you the benefit of novelty. Our memories are merely bookmarks of things far away. For goodness sakes, keep them there.
Dear Ted
Boy, it seems like there's a new party every week! And I just have so many questions. How should I dress? What should I say? How can I mingle successfully? How do you play all those wonderful party games?
Signed,
Party Newbie
Dear Newbie
Regrettably our column isn't long enough to tackle all your queries, so in an act of pure caprice, I'll answer your question concerning games.
I happen to have a lot of experience in games, so you've come to the right man in inquiring their rules of play. Here are some of my favorites!
Pin the tail on the licentious reveler
First, procure a blindfold and a sharp object. Justice is blind, you see. Then, run those lewd men through! Be sure to make a lot of grunts and squeals as you play. It's a roleplaying exercise. Perhaps a few rhetorical questions, asking them how they would like to be slow-roasted over a pit. It's a surprisingly poetic game, causing your fellow party-goers to contemplate how the excesses of their festivities liken them to swine.
Mystery drink
Alcohol, as we all know, is the root of all evils, so party-goers who aren't committed to hell will prove as much with punch bowls instead. Like too many cooks and broth, however, everyone is free to add whatever they'd like to the concoction. OdorLESS, but flavorFULL is key. Deodorant, soy milk, the tears of a groom whose wife isn't quite what he'd hoped...anything goes! My personal favorite is antifreeze.
Navigator
This game takes some work. First, you'll need to be at a party taking place high up. I hear many such things take place on multiple-story roofs. Closer to the sky, the better! Then, find a woodsman to make an obstacle course lined with bear traps, snares, and the like. Then, the groups split into two-person teams, one with covered eyes, and the other with a sturdy throat. The latter will yell directions to his teammate, telling him how to get to the grand prize at the end of the maze: Five dollars! It's great fun, trying to discern which voice among the din of the crowd is your friend, and which are only so many banshee wails, leading you into a plunge off the abyss. For added fun, swap the monetary reward for a bin of used syringes. Boy won't their face be red!
Russian Roulette
Need I say more? Well that is what the Tribune is paying me for, ho ho ho! If you have a hard time rounding up participants, simply ask if death is really to be feared, given that they've used the gift of life in order to consume garbage and inundate their minds with the distractions of the world. Nothing gets one in a festive mood quite like the meaninglessness of their wasted time!
Naturally, always ask your host for permission when it comes to which games to play. Politeness and parties go hand-in-hand!
Insincerely,
Ted
And with that, unfortunately our dear Ted has quit! Look forward to seeing what new column we'll have next. We wish Ted good luck in his future ventures and thank him for his advice column while he was with the Tribune.
Job Listings
Need a job? Check out a few jobs open right here in Genessia and its neighboring cities!
Kame Game, Genessia: It's time to d-d-d-d-d-d-do some work! Kame Game is hiring an Assistant Manager and a Sales Assistant! Speak to Yugi Mutou to apply!
Planetarium, Nova City: Like the stars? The planets? Space in general? Sell merch for it! The Planetarium is hiring a gift shop clerk.
The Bunbunmaru: Newspaper alternative to the Genessia Tribune. We aren't too pleased, but we're impartial reporters so we're telling you that they are a culture writer and information gatherers! Talk to Aya Shameimaru to apply.
Schnee Company Welcoming and Travel Services, Genessia: New company seeking employees for the following positions: IT (***). All employees must be willing to work on a team. Pays may be raised over time pending future success. Contact Weiss Schnee for more information.
Pan's Grocery, Genessia: Positions open for Cashiers, Food Craft Specialists, and Baggers.
The Rabbit's Foot, Everglade: Two positions for fortune teller. Fortune telling methods must not be the same for both tellers. Pay is ***. Must be the real deal, no charlatans here!
Rocks, Genessia: Jewelry store looking for jewelry resizer, sales clerks, and in need of non-celebrity models- dark brown/black hair only. Speak to Bridget Frostheart to apply.
[ OOC: ATTENTION! Please note that due to large volume of hiring positions, the ones advertised in the newspaper will rotate from now on unless the player specifically requests the position to be included in the newspaper. Thank you!
Additionally, if a name is not listed, you do not need to contact anyone's player to apply for the job, simply comment the employment page. Any place of business with a name is owned by a character and you will need to plot your character's addition to the business with that character's player or have it in a thread. ]
Bounties
Genessia:
Frigus Fultus: Someone has been going around turning the refrigerators and freezers down to the point that various businesses have had their food ruined from extremely quick frostbite. It's unknown how the culprit or culprits are breaking into restaurants and ruining their supplies, but something needs to be done quick! The Genessian Restaurant Association is offering 2,500 red bills to the first person to catch this icy jerk!
Attleton
Party Rock: A mass group of ravers have been going around throwing "Flash Mob Parties" by breaking into various businesses after hours and throwing a rave. They don't even clean up after themselves. After complaints started coming in, the next party left behind a big sign that said "SORRY FOR PARTY ROCKING LOL" and had various smiley faces on it. Catch the party scene and call the cops on it to bust the partiers for 800 red bills.
Everglade
Fayren
The Toll of Wedding Bells: A forbidden marriage between a troll and the blacksmith's wife had been underway when the unthinkable happened. A mysterious masked criminal swooped in from the church ceiling and stole both rings as they sparkled with beautiful diamonds right from the ceremony. As the troll It'll open soon. chased the criminal out into the hallway of the church, a loud gunshot rang out. Upon investigation, authorities found that the gunshot came from the opposite direction of the masked criminal. Solve the murder and return the rings to the grieving fiance for 18,000 red bills.
Nova City
No bounty was submitted this week due to Nova City's current emergency!
Your Weather Forecast
Genessia City
*Monday, April 20 - Clear. High 54 F / Low 35 F
*Tuesday, April 21 - Cloudy. High 57 F / Low 32 F
*Wednesday, April 22 - Cloudy. High 50 F / Low 31 F
*Thursday, April 23- Cloudy. High 64 F / Low 41 F
*Friday, April 24 - Cloudy. High 51 F / Low 39 F
*Saturday, April 25 - Clear. High 49 F / Low 39 F
*Sunday, April 26 - Clear. High 55 F / Low 38 F
Attleton
*Monday, April 20- Sunny. High 65 F / Low 40 F
*Tuesday, April 21 - Cloudy. High 55 F / Low 46 F
*Wednesday, April 22 - Sunny. High 77 F / Low 59 F
*Thursday, April 23 - Cloudy. High 62 F / Low 54 F
*Friday, April 24 - Scattered Showers. High 53 F / Low 42 F
*Saturday, April 25 - Partly Cloudy. High 49 F / Low 40 F
*Sunday, April 26 - Sunny. High 60 F / Low 51 F
Everglade
*Monday, April 20 - Cloudy. High 33 F / Low 22 F
*Tuesday, April 21 - Cloudy. High 34 F / Low 21 F
*Wednesday, April 22 - Cloudy. High 39 F / Low 29 F
*Thursday, April 23 - Showers. High 40 F / Low 31 F
*Friday, April 24 - Rain. High 34 F / Low 29 F
*Saturday, April 25 - Fog. High 43 F / Low 34 F
*Sunday, April 26 - Heavy Fog. High 54 F / Low 40 F
Fayren
*Monday, April 20 - Sunny. High 60 F / Low 47 F
*Tuesday, April 21 - Sunny. High 67 F / Low 58 F
*Wednesday, April 22 - Sunny. High 72 F / Low 64 F
*Thursday, April 23 - Partly Cloudy. High 70 F / Low 59 F
*Friday, April 24 - Cloudy. High 76 F / Low 52 F
*Saturday, April 25 - Rainy. High 64 F / Low 44 F
*Sunday, April 26 - Rainy. 63 F / Low 50 F
Nova City
*Monday, April 20 - Sunny. High 69 F / Low 60 F
*Tuesday, April 21 - Partly Cloudy. High 65 F / Low 60 F
*Wednesday, April 22 - Sunny. High 73 F / Low 63 F
*Thursday, April 23 - Sunny. High 81 F / Low 69 F
*Friday, April 24 - Sunny, Dry. High 96 F / Low 88 F
*Saturday, April 25 - Sunny. High 74 F / Low 62 F
*Sunday, April 26 - Sprinkles. 74 F / Low 70 F
[ OOC: Want to submit anything to the newspaper? Reply to this comment with the subject line as your title and include any information you want to be sure is in next Sunday's newspaper! This includes news, gossip, singles ads, business advertisements, job listings, bounties, and anything else you want in the newspaper.
FOR BOUNTIES: Reply to this comment with either a claim or a log (every 3 claims must include a log). Feel free to team up, or even fail to deliver the bounty. Please note that whoever goes after the bounty is in charge of writing the NPCs involved, but feel free to ask the mod for any tips if you like. First come first serve on claims unless you haven't turned in a log for every 3 bounties. ]
Bounty Claims
Re: Bounty Claims
no subject
Submissions for the Next Paper!
BOUNTY - Genessia