genessia | 1 Penguin | Voice/Action to those who don't know him.

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1 Penguin | Voice/Action to those who don't know him.

[Well the past two days have been eventful. He had spent the time to Fayren unable to be seen by most people he had been friends with in this city. He tried different things and still nothing. Why can't they seem to see him and worse remember him? He felt his fears creeping up on him during the couple of days and now he found himself sitting alone and helpless. He was alone. Alone. Sitting on a step, arms wrapped around his legs, the device in his hand. He wondered if there would even be a point of doing such a thing. But he switched it on, his usual cheery demeanour gone, so his voice didn't have that chipperness to it.]

Is anyone else affected by what is going on in Fayren? Can anyone I know even hear this... I doubt it. But... if they do. I'm sorry.

[That was all he could say really. Nothing more and nothing less. All he could do was watch the illusion of his friends and hear the words he never wanted to hear and even worse had forgotten about him. Just before he switches the feed off, he grips himself harder, trying to pretend he could hear there words as soon a slight sob escaped his lips and just before he switches off he speaks in a whisper.]

Please make it stop. [With that it goes quiet.]

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What? What's going on in Fayren?

Edited 2015-10-28 06:01 (UTC)

I guess just seeing what one doesn't want to see.

[He didn't feel like going into something long and complicated because right now, he just wanted to curl up and ignore the world now. But he was trying.]

Can you leave?

I don't see the point in leaving at this point. I might not have anything to go back to in the apartment.

Why, what is happening? What are you seeing?

I don't want to say.

[he simply believes what he sees to be his fear and possibly the truth which is what he deep down wondered.]

All I will say is what I see could be the truth.

[ Tough one. ]

But it might not be.

How exactly would you know?

You told me as much. You said it might be true.

That means it might not be, too.

You know to begin with I already thought that. But the more you keep hearing it the less you believe it.

Then it sounds like you're already aware of the trap. You just need to recognize it as one.

Come to Everglade and talk to me. It doesn't have to be about whatever it is your fixating on, it can just be something to do. I think distracting yourself will help.

It's probably not a trap though.

[Even if what they say are his own fears, he's heard it so many times his mind feels like it was facts instead. He isn't sure he could get over that.]

Fears are things we don't want to see or hear, but they are something that is there.

No, that's not true at all.

Fear is an emotion. It's there to train us to act a certain way; to try to keep us safe.

Happiness, embarrassment, anger; all the emotions you feel are reactions you have to your environment, to reward or punish you for certain behaviors. Emotions are wonderful things that let us experience the world in a unique way, but they are also dangerous because they are simple and powerful and easy to trick.

Your fear is real; it is palpable, it is powerful. The fixation of your fear? It might be real, it might not be.

But in this case, what utility is your fear actually giving you?

If you were to push past your fear and look at your problem, you'd find that either your fear is true or its false. The worse case in this scenario is that your fear is true. It would hurt, I'm sure. It would hurt very much.

But lets say you give into your fear and just assume that its true. What have you gained? Haven't you still accepted that your fear is true? Isn't the pain the same?

The only possibility for a positive outcome is to discard your fear and discover the real solution.

I guess I would gained some understanding and in knowing that to work on it. As I said I know what I fear could be a fact and thus would need to change in order to not have people hate me.

[Aqua switches to video the instant she hears the frantic whisper hoping that there is someway she can help.]

Hey, It's okay. I hear you. What'd going on? Are you okay?

[She's more than just a little worried.]

What's your name?

[That was a voice he was pretty sure he hadn't heard before. Maybe that was why they were paying attention to him... because they had no idea of who he was. As he was about to speak he wondered if they knew, would they no longer see him? or was it simply because his fear was about his friends and those he considered friends that they wouldn't be affected even if he mentioned who he was?

He knew he should take the risk never the less as his eyes still kept to the floor.]

I'm... Nagisa Hazuki and I'm fine. Just...hearing the truth hurts, I guess.

What truth?

[Aqua's voice sounds concerned. He looks so broken up and while she doesn't know him, she still doesn't want to see anyone like this.]

Just what people might really think of me.

[At least this is his fear anyway, that people do hate him for what he's like, hate him for so many reasons. It was something he never wanted to hear but now he wondered if his fear was truth.]

[Aqua smiles.]

You seem like a wonderful person to me.

[Her smile widens a little more, her blue eyes shining with confidence.]

I'm very good at reading people, Nagisa.

[He wasn't sure how she could tell since she had only seen him once and n this state. So maybe this was the best way, right?]

I guess like this I am.

[Aqua's smile falters.]

Not like this. Your friends care about you, even if they are very far away.

[All of her friends are far away from her but she believes in them.]

My friends are in Genessia actually. Well a few of them.

[A few others were still at home that he already missed and wished they were here.]

It's not that they don't care... they just don't like how I behave. I'm childish and make people do things they don't want... Or call them by stupid names. That's what they tell me anyway.

[Aqua listens for a moment before nodding her head with a smile.]

It sounds like they really care about you. You remind me of someone I know too. [He's so much like Ven.]

What are some of those nicknames? I'd love to hear them.

[He tilted his head slightly. Being mean and saying they don't like him makes them care. That was an odd for him to think about him.]

It's just there name with -chan, though I just shorten there name.

[That doesn't sound really annoying, as far as nicknames go. Aqua laughs softly.]

That sounds cute though I don't know how you'd shorten my name.

It depends on the name, some I don't shorten if there is a set number of letters.

[There were many exceptions of nicknames really Rei being one of them, but he figured he might not like being called chan.]

[Aqua smiles looking at the screen.]

Well my name is Aqua.

Then it would just be Aqua-chan.

[He doesn't quite understand why he's explaining this really since he was thinking of stopping it since it seemed to piss people off so much.]

So that wouldn't be annoying at least.

I like it.

[Aqua smiles brightly.]

I'm sure others like it too.

[She hopes that he can see it, that he doesn't submit to his fears.]

Not always.

[Or at least a couple of people he knows does not like it, but he grips the device slightly and curls up a little more than he had been doing before.]

I don't think I actually had anyone say they liked it. Except you.

[Aqua smiles, her expression a little wistful.]

Sometimes things are annoying but if they were to ever leave or stop, then you'd miss them. I had friends who I cared about very much and all those little things they used to do, those are the things I miss the most.

[Ven running up to her and asking her questions or sneaking away from training to watch the stars. Her and Terra's rivalry or even just her friends laughter. She misses every part of them.]

Even if they don't tell you they like it... I know it will be something they'd miss if you stopped.

[No mater how much the words make sense and would be something that would get him out of his funk, he could hear the voices once again, and the figures standing before him saying them. But since the device wasn't facing them they couldn't be seen. Instead it was simply of Nagisa covering his ears for a moment so that only his hair could be seen.]

Nagisa!

[Aqua nervously stresses his name, her bright blue gaze watching the screen with a worried expression.]

Nagisa where are you?

[She doesn’t want him to be alone, he doesn’t look like he’s doing well and even if it means facing her own fears she’d go.]

[He shook his head slightly before he couldn't hear the voices any more. With that in mind he finally moved his arms and could see the device again.]

Sorry...I didn't go anywhere.

I know but where are you now?

[She doesn't want him to be alone.]

I can head that way.

I'm nowhere.

[Well he didn't actually know if he ha to admit to anything.]

[That doesn't seem possible but Aqua knows when someone doesn't want her around.]

Well if you need me... I'm in Genessia.

[He'll know he'll probably apologize for all this later, but for now he just nods slightly and switches off the feed.]

Nagisa-kun? Where are you? I... I've been looking everywhere for you.

Edited 2015-11-18 12:05 (UTC)

I'm in Fayren somewhere. I thought you would know that.

Fayren..? Why would I have known that? You can't just leave on your own and then assume that we'll know where you'll be at all times.

[Maybe her voice came out as if she were lecturing him, but more than that, fear and worry was ringing out in her voice.]

[He closed his eyes for a moment, he simply heard it as a leture no matter how someone said it.]

Because that's where I work... Sorry, I thought I mentioned it to you. Sorry.

Oh... Sorry... I forgot where it was located... [And now she feels even worse.]

It's fine. It's my fault for not being clear.

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