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[punsofmisery]

Hello.

I am interested in purchasing more furniture for my apartment. I am wanting different furniture that isn't as bright and happy as what I already have. I need something that looks sorrowful and miserable to compliment my own life... Being able to purchase black out curtains would also be a benefit to me.

There is too much light here. It makes me feel hopeful and I shouldn't be feeling that emotion.

Clothes don't seem to be an issue just the furniture at this point. I appreciate your help ahead of time.

- ☠Hades

Comments

[punsofmisery]

Why would I want repulsive furniture? I'm only wanting it to be colored by dyes...not by dies.

[youfool]

It ought to keep you lonelier, for one. No one would dare be tempted to visit you in a sty. A sort of domestic leprosy.

...did you just make a pun?

[punsofmisery]

Is leprosy included with the furniture? I don't want to have to deal with that again.









I
Yes
I did.

[youfool]

Ah, no, that was meant metaphorically. Still, I'm glad for your recovery in that. Were you handled by St. Louis, by chance?

[chuckles]

You ought to meet my friend Death. He's a natural at tragicomedy.

[punsofmisery]

Ah, no. I didn't suffer from it myself. I had
acquaintances
who suffered from it.

Death? Do you mean Thanatos?

[youfool]

My condolences.

Not quite; Thanatos had rather more flesh on him than whom I speak. Here, I'll send you a picture.

[punsofmisery]

Is Death trying to be more hip these days?

[youfool]

He does look like one who belongs in something more ornate, doesn't he? Personally I believe he's tired, and looking for a stay of his labors. Suppose that's why so few really die around here. Though I wouldn't call slippers during all hours fashionable by any means; wearing sleepwear when awake is very contrary.

[punsofmisery]

He should be ready if he were to ever get called
What do you mean? There's no death here?

[youfool]

Don't worry; when duty rears its ugly head, he'll respond, however nonchalantly. Until then, only fate could possibly unite you. Oh, you must be new. Simply put, any death can be undone with the proper sacrifice of skill or memory. The only lasting death is a spiritual one, not bodily.

[punsofmisery]

Oh.

But people are still able to die elsewhere, right?

[youfool]

Elsewhere, meaning outside this world? Yes, I believe so, though of course I can't say for sure.

[punsofmisery]

Good, as long as the flow continues elsewhere.

[youfool]

I can't quite understand that; why death should be 'good' nor why you should be pleased by it. As I recall you weren't too pleased when your lot put you in charge of the underworld. Taken more pleasure in your work since then?

Oh, and do you still have that helmet of invisibility? Could I see it? Or not see it?

[punsofmisery]

.............

I need to go, excuse me.

[youfool]

Oh, ah, all right! Let me know if you change your mind about that furniture, or if you'd like anything else since you seem like a fresh face here. Fare well! Or poorly, though that doesn't seem good to wish even if it does reign in your curse.