[video]

[hawkeblock]

[ waking up in a strange place with no recollection of how he got there? must be tuesday.

he's already heard the long speech from the hologram, read up on how to use this weird-ass phone, and successfully wandered around the city for a solid two hours before making an appearance on the network. ]

Hello, my name is Hawke. I'm going to spare you all the lost and confused newbie bit and cut right to the chase:

I need a drink. Or ten. If anyone can direct me to the nearest tavern, I would appreciate it. [ there's too much shit happening at home, too much shit happening here, and he does not want to deal with this right now. he'll figure his shit out later when he's good and drunk. ] The seedier the better, and if anyone wants to join me - you're more than welcome to. Less pathetic if I'm not drinking alone.

[ he looks ready to end it there, then quickly adds: ]

Also, if any of my fellow Kirkwallers (Kirkwallians? Kirkwallites?) are here as well, try and get a hold of me on this thing. ... And try not to break anything.

[ HAWKE OUT. ]

Comments

[Video]

[inquisitor_lavellan]

[Alley regards the video feed with open suspicion. The Hawke she had met -- who Varric spoke of -- who she'd accidentally dragged into the fade -- had been female. Marian. Definitely less... beard.]

...Interesting.

[Video]

[shy_mage]

Th-They make really good wild berry drinks h-here.

[He was thirsty, right?]

[video]

[youfool]

[Seedy? Must be some flavor of bad guy. Oh, he'll show him seedy.]

Hello Hawke. You'll find exactly what you're looking for on Laurel and 20th.

[It's Jack's Bar and Karaoke Club. If he could see the look on his face...]

[hawkeblock]

[ can't a guy just enjoy the familiar smell of stale piss and vomit without being a bad guy? ]

Maybe I should have specified that I have no idea where I am, and haven't been looking at street names. [ assuming those are street names.] What does this place look like? Maybe I'll get lucky.

[hawkeblock]

I was thinking more hard liquor and dark ale, but maybe I'll go really crazy and try some wild berry, too.

[ fuck it what does he got to lose??? ]

You're going to have to be more specific than 'here,' though. Because I'm fairly certain the flower shop I'm standing outside of doesn't sell drinks.

[hawkeblock]

[ uhhh. hawke stares back, growing increasingly more uncomfortable the longer this staring goes on. when she finally speaks, hawke isn't even sure what to say.

which is amazing, because hawke doesn't know how to shut up normally. ]

I'm going to regret asking, I just know it, but... what's 'interesting'?

[Video]

[shy_mage]

O-Oh... Th-They have some ciders, too. It's called the 'The Marsh Woodsman'... I-It's an inn, in Fayren.

Th-There's a tavern called the... the "The Drunken Monkey", too. B-But... I haven't been there. It... It seems like it gets a l-little noisy.

[inquisitor_lavellan]

[The Inquisitor often has that effect; she thinks nothing of it.]

The idea that there may be more than one version of our world. Of all worlds, potentially. That's... interesting.

[And a little alarming.]

Where I am from, the Hawke I met and who Varric knew and wrote about, was female.

[youfool]

[...it's a long shot]

"Oh, ah, here." [He'd take the time to be Hawke's first tutor, and tutorialize the hell out of his phone. Or at least the map function. Fortunately, the city is a simplistic square with all the streets having equal lengths, arranged alphabetically and numerically. What could be easier! And if that doesn't work, he'll just ping where it is on his phone directly. Ain't technology grand?]

"You really can't miss it."

[hawkeblock]

I was right, I do regret asking.

[ the concept of there being worlds outside of his own is mind-boggling enough. but he can at least vaguely begin to believe it - the universe is a big place. or something. but this lady is already moving into territory that hawke has since decided he is far too sober to tread. ]

This is a joke, right? You mentioned Varric, so I'm going to assume he put you up to this. Funny.

[hawkeblock]

As Taverns tend to be. [ noise might be good right now. maybe he won't be able to hear himself think about all the weird shit happening right now. ]

And where's the Drunken Monkey? I may very well visit both today.

[hawkeblock]

[ hawke's already studied the thing and he gets the basic idea of it. so the process of finding the map and the corresponding dot indicating the bar isn't too painful. ]

Thanks. Glad someone around here is inclined to assist a man in getting sloshed out of his mind without any questions.

[inquisitor_lavellan]

[Alley considers for a moment, then snorts softly. Okay, then.]

Yes, you should have seen the cover art for the book.

[Her tone is so dry, and her expression gives nothing away. Even her own Inquisition has a hard time telling when she's being serious or not, sometimes.]

The Orlesian ball gown was a nice touch; who knew it would work with that beard?

[hawkeblock]

[ hawke's going to assume she's joking if only for his own benefit right now. ]

Don't you know beards go with everything? Especially fancy Orlesian dresses. Oh, but did it match my eyes? That's the most important part.

[inquisitor_lavellan]

Of course. Varric wouldn't have it any other way.

[hawkeblock]

He is a master of his craft.

How do you know him anyway?

[inquisitor_lavellan]

That depends. Do you want a serious answer, or something else ridiculous?

[hawkeblock]

[ HAHA. god he doesn't want to answer that. ]

Surprise me. [ HE WON'T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE ANYWAY. ]

Video????

[undemonic]

[they've been here only like, minutes, or hours maybe and they're ALREADY not allowed to run amok?

And here I thought we'd have the chance to really make a lasting first impression. [he says this with a shrug.]

Any luck on finding somewhere for a drink, Hawke? [it sounds like a good idea to him.]

[hawkeblock]

Don't worry, I've already made an impression from the sound of things. People even know my name. [ APPARENTLY. ]

I have a couple of options. The Marsh Woodsman, The Drunken Monkey, and this one someone marked on my map but didn't give a name for. Probably questionable, I recommend it.

[inquisitor_lavellan]

[There's more of that patented Inquisitor stare as Alley considers which path to go down.]

...I paint his covers, of course. You're welcome for the dress, I made it extra Orlesian.

[There's not much point in being serious with someone who obviously isn't ready for it yet. Let him at least find those bars, first. Alleyana Lavellan is nothing if not a thoughtful force of death and destruction.]

[undemonic]

With names like that, I think I would be more comfortable taking the risk with the questionable choice. Seems safest.

[or most interesting. Honestly. What's next? The Purple Octopus?]

[hawkeblock]

[ anders they regularly drink at THE HANGED MAN do you even have any room to judge here? ]

Fair enough. Where are you now?

[hawkeblock]

[ he expected worse. he assumes he should possibly expect worse in the future, considering what she said earlier about the whole... lady hawke thing. but hawke takes the opening and rolls with it. ]

Much appreciated - I'm sure it looks lovely. You'll have to show me sometime. [ or don't. ] Is... Varric here as well?

[undemonic]

[Listen. That is because the budget for DA2 was garbage and there likely aren't any other choices.

... but fair enough.]

Not wading around in some wet cave for one. [who thought that was a good idea?]