Issue #2 :: May 3, 2014

[papergurrl]

[ Good morning citizens of Genessia, Nova City, Fayren, Attleton and Everglade! Today brings you the second issue of the Tradewinds Newsletter with a bit of a surprise. Not only do no windows get broken, but no noses get broken either. Instead, the newsletters are delivered to mailboxes, with a random lottery ticket with a four digit number and the recipient's name printed on it attached to each one. ]

Tradewinds Newsletter

Welcome Lucky Readers of the Tradewinds,

Thanks for sticking with us, with the second issue of the Tradewind's Newsletter. Due to an outrageous number of complaints in regards to our papergirl's manner of delivery, we would like to extend a formal, emphatic apology to the victims of her throwing arm. CC would like to apologize as well.

CC: WHATEVER. QQ MORE BABIES fj3i2987-ajih HEY JERK DON'T OPPRESS M-

Editor: We at the Tradewinds do not condone Cira's behavior. It's absolutely unacceptable and she will be reprimanded harshly. We have entered the victims of her 'attacks' in a random drawing for either a prize or prize money. If you wish to claim your prize, please come to the Tradewinds office, located next to the Tribune's New Office. Unclaimed prizes will be donated to a subscriber at random.

[ OOC: Previous Victims: Minako Aino, Sora, Jounouchi Katsuya, Stefano, Battler Ushiromiya, Natsu Dragneel
Random Lottery Winners: Lydia Deetz, Terra, Rikku, Satsuki Kiryuin, Mitsuru Kirijo, Yang Xiao Long, Legretta the Quick, Koenma

Winners and victims alike can comment to the lottery thread included in this post for your "prize" :D. ]

---

Crazy as Hell Productions

is proud to present

HELLFIRE

a dramatic operatic retelling of the forbidden love between a harlot and a priest.

Network Tickets $10 for adults and $4 for children (10 years and under), tickets are $20 for adults and $7 for children at the door
Showings available at the Opera House in Genessia at 4PM and 8PM from May 3rd to May 10th

---

This Week in Review
The Stapler (3D)
This was an indie film that I'm still, after watching it three times, not sure exactly how to describe it. It's clear the director wanted to tell a story that had a deep message, and it fell just short of that. It instead tells the story of a downtrodden man who's sole possession is his office stapler, and what happens when even that is taken from him.

The 3D effects are the worst part of the entire movie - the same effect is repeated over and over. The story itself is embarrassingly dull, but there is a certain charm to it that I find myself going back again and again. It is an experience that is something you have to see to believe..again.

See it... if you want to believe it... at the Holo Theatre in Nova City.

Rating: ★ ★ ☆ ☆ ☆

---

HELP WANTED

Help! I've been under the weather, and I'm a bit behind in my meat deliveries. I've been trying to make up for it, but there's just too much meat for one man to deliver, and everytime I set outside these dogs start chasing after me. I need someone to either make these deliveries or deal with those annoying strays!
Dalton, ~Attleton Meat Market

Help!
WELP I gotta thank all you kind adventurers that came to clean out the Biguana, but now it seems an even bigger beast has settled in its place. Some locals said they caught sight of a huge snake near that den. It hasn't gone near the town, probably ate up what Biguana were left, and as long as it doesn't bother the people I'm not gonna bother it. I need someone to scout out the den and see if that thing's still there and if it's safe.
Stuart Tanner, Everglade Tanners

Help! A sudden squall wrecked my ship and it sank not far from the beach in Fayren, and all of my supplies fell overboard. I need someone to help recover whatever they can from the wreckage. Non swimmers need not apply. I'll be at the Drunken Monkey in Fayren.
Captain Ignatious. B. Peanut, of the Swampy Mary.

Help! Mom's been busting my chops lately. So what if my room is a mess? I don't get visitors often! But whatever, to shut her up, I want someone to clean my room. $500 reward.
~Carter, Regency Apartments, Penthouse 4A

Help! A band of thieves have been hitting a few stores in Genessia City, but everytime someone goes after them they manage to slip away. Also they have access to .. unusual attacks, and several times those who go after them ... eventually don't want to. Someone out there has got to have the guts to take these menaces down!
~Julia Taylor, Taylor Jewelry

[ OOC PM this account if you take any of the jobs listed, and you'll get ooc details about it. ]

Comments

Lottery and Consolation Prizes

[papergurrl]

[ There is a bored looking girl with blonde hair chewing purple bubblegum sitting at the table, with a box full of random prizes. If you were VERY observant and not knocked flat on your a$$ during the first issue, you might recognize her as the paper girl. This is why there are two security guards standing by to make sure there's no trouble. At each person's approach, she SIGHS like it is the biggest problem of the WORLD to be here, and says: ]

Gimme the ticket k.

[ OOC: Pick a random number from between 1000 and 9999 for your prize! Do it. DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT. ]

[for_my_father]

[ This is strange. She doesn't remember signing up for a lottery, but she'll roll with it while minorly suspicious of it through and through. she picks up a slip labeled 5750. ]

[papergurrl]

[ CC SIGHS, taking the lottery ticket, and running the number down a list. ]

Mitsuru Kirijo. Here's your prize.

[ She reaches into a basket and takes out a carefully wrapped package, handing it over to the other woman.

In the package Mitsuru will find a medium-sized bronze (about 6" tall) statue of a falcon. ]

[for_my_father]

Pleasure of doing business with you.

[ Misturu takes the package as she sees what's inside it. A 6" tall figurine of a falcon. How interesting. ]

[weavemyownfate]

[Satsuki should know better.. She really should but the harsh truth is that she'd be a bigger fool not to come- It'd just be her luck that she ends up turning down something that would end up being useful.

She arrives not long after Mitsuru, and her brows furrow in response to manner in which she's addressed. What a brat!

Satsuki hands over ticket #1. Hot.]

[papergurrl]

[ And Satsuki gets a dry SIGH and a roll of her eyes for that furrowed brow. WHATEVER. However, she takes (snatches) the ticket out of Satsuki's hand and reads it over. ]

.. PSH, At least You're not named after a -car- like that last one. Here.

[ She snatches up a small purple velvet bag and shoves it at Satsuki's face. Inside Satsuki will find several useful items, such as: A pearl necklace, a piece of gum, a package of crisp and crunchy edibles, a bottle of oil, and a spoon. Yay! ]

[weavemyownfate]

[Satsuki opens the bag, looks inside.. Then her brow twitches. She feels that, somehow, she has been defeated utterly today. She doesn't even wear pearl necklaces. She closes her eyes. Mustn't.. Get. Angry.

Though she did recognize the redhead and she corrects, rather flatly,]

You are referring to a 'Mitsubishi', not 'Mitsuru'. [Though she immedietly wonders why she wasted her time.] Might I ask what the most valuable prize is in this.. Event?

[papergurrl]

[ CC waved a hand. ]

WhatEVER it's all the same thing with you people and your freaky-deaky names, kay?

[ Most valuable prize huh? ]

What's the point? You didn't win it, and they change the prizes every week since they started this stupid thing. Could be a gold sword, or a basket of kittens for all I know.

[weavemyownfate]

[CC she will SMACK LECTURE YOU.]

...

[SIGH.]

Very well.

[Satsuki turns and departs before an accident happens.]

[soldierofloveandbeauty]

[Minako felt like she did the last time she did something like this. Wishing for luck and hoping to get a decent prize if not the best one. With her ticket in her hand with the numbers 2047 on.

Once she reached the table she held it out.]

Here you go.

[papergurrl]

[ CC may or may not be hiding a smile (HA HA YOU GOT HIT IN THE FACE i mean hi) when Minako approached. Taking the ticket, she looked it over quickly and retrieved a red velvet bag from the case at her side, handing it over. ]

[ Inside the bag are three items: A heart shaped peppercorn-sized smooth irridescent dark pink crystal, a bottle of orange nail polish, and a jar of some white cream that smells terrible, but the print on the back reads that it : "aids certain skin problems and speeds up the healing process", ]

[soldierofloveandbeauty]

[She looked at the contents for a moment. Pretty good, except the white cream, but she'll get over the smell... hopefully.]

Thank, though does the jar really do what it says it does?

[papergurrl]

[ CC huffed a bubble about half the size of her face, then sucked it back in and popped it in her mouth. ]

Dunno. Never tried it. [ She replied, chewing dat gum. Noisily. ] Supposed to though. Try it. I mean, what's the worst that'd happen, you break out in a rash or something?

[ Ha ha ha, yea no, it works just fine. ]

[soldierofloveandbeauty]

[She'll try it later then once she is certain it won't do anything. Picking up the things she gives a warm smile.]

You never know, maybe. Don't want to get a rash on this skin. [She really wouldn't like that after all. With a little wink she turns around.]

Catch you later. [And off she goes.]

[solar_flare]

[Yang just came back from what's got to be the worst mission ever, her entire team knocked flat by some big jerk bird. Figuring she's already spent her bad luck for the day, maybe she'll get some good luck now! She hands over her ticket with a smile. Awwwww, little delinquent! You remind Yang of herself when she was a feisty tween. ♥]

[OOC: 3654 for her!]

[papergurrl]

[ HA HA you got beat up by a bird ..wait. CC takes the ticket, looking it over for a moment, then at Yang, then back at the ticket. ]

Is this -really- your name? Because I -totally- thought 'Yang' was a guy's name.

[ Nonetheless! She runs the ticket, and blinks in surprise. ]

Whoah, you almost got the grand prize. Almost.

[ She's ALMOST impressed. Almost. In any case CC Shrugs, picking up a round white basket with pink shredded paper. There are of course, a few small items in the basket: A tiny star-shaped crystal that is transparent bright pink in color, an empty glass bottle made of opaque orange glass, a promotional box set for an up and coming new television show called Alice Commando and the Foxbots, a plush purple octopus with a little hat and a ticket for a free cake at Kiki's Cake Shoppe. ]

[solar_flare]

I guess it depends on how weird your dad is! My full name means 'Little Sun Dragon.'

[She says it pretty cheerfully, because hell yes little sun dragon is an awesome name and she loves it. While the ticket runs, she waits with a hand on her hip, head cocked to the side, smiling. She doesn't really expect to win anything, but it's fun to try.]

[But she DID win something. YES! Look how happy she is!]

Almost is good enough for me! Wow, thanks!

[She happily accepts her basket and starts looking through the contents. The crystal is cute! Weiss might like it. She's not sure what to do with the bottle, but it's her favorite color. Maybe it'll come in handy later. The DVD's sound hilarious, and she's positive that Ruby would love the octopus. AND WHO DOESN'T LIKE FREE CAKE? Time to go shopping! She hugs her basket, beaming from ear to ear.]

Thanks~! ♥

[respect_points]

[It's a pleasant surprise to find out that Rikku has won something. So she's happily showing up, unaware that this is the infamous papergirl in question. Handing her ticket (4435) over, she gave a cheeky grin.]

What did I get?!

[papergurrl]

[ All part of the plan m'dear Rikku, hfufufufu. Er. Well there's no actual PLAN per se. ]

Diabetes. Can you tone down the cheeriness a bit, gawd. [ Ignore her, she's cranky to pretty much everyone. ... wow she feels like she just kicked a puppy. That's weird. She takes the ticket in any case, cross checking it, before she picks up a basket, handing it over. ]

Congraaatulations.

[ Inside the basket are several assorted items: A spoon, a bottle of lotion, a container of pudding, a plush bunny, a scallop shell and It's a sphere made of marble.* ]

[ OOC Said sphere is a magic item, I'll pm you extra details ]

[respect_points]

[Never. She can never tune the down the cheeriness, but she's ignoring that. Examining the basket, she's not exactly sure why she's getting random stuff, but the plush bunny was cute. She could use the lotion and the pudding looked good at least. The thing that caught her eye the most was the sphere. Grabbing it to examining it closer, she looked at it in awe.]

Wow! I can't wait to show Yunie this.

Re: Lottery and Consolation Prizes

[strange_unusual]

She couldn't remember the last time she had won something but maybe because this was an odd town ... place ... odder things were meant to happen!

So off she went to collect her prize, with the paper that had appeared by her head just that morning. Once she was able to not get lost and find where she was supposed to go, she did get a little excited. She walked up, a little nervous and handed the girl her ticket, numbered 7878. "Hi. Um. Are you sure I won?"

Re: Lottery and Consolation Prizes

[papergurrl]

"That depends," CC sighed as she took the ticket, "Is this really your ticket, or did you steal it?" She ... didn't seem like she cared one way or the other though, running it across a checklist. "Lydia Deetz? Here's your prize."

And she reached down for another package, hoisting it up to hand it over to the girl. "Enjoy it." She's even being a bit nicer to Lydia than the others - surprisingly. Inside the box there were numerous items: A plush bear missing an eye, a snowglobe, a pair of binoculars. a bottle of perfume, and a roll of duct tape.

[never_go_back]

OH EMM GEE.

MINAKO WE'RE GOING TO GO SEE HELLFIRE OPENING NIGHT!

[tomboytendo]

( I DON'T WANNA! ... I mean. Oh god XD )

[soldierofloveandbeauty]

Of course! There is nothing like a forbidden love story.