genessia | Wouldn't It Be Nice

Entry tags:

Wouldn't It Be Nice

Who: Wade and Bane
Where: Apartmentside, cuz they bros
When: Forward dated to the 4th
What: EVENT TIME ITS THE EVENT WHOOPIE HOORAY
Warnings: Mentions of terminal illness, physical pain, mental illness, angst, more angst, someone might cry a little

Sure as hell was Friday. Wade would say there was nothing he loved more than FRIDAY but considering the job he worked at, every day may as well be Friday. Getting paid to party wasn't that bad, after all.

But hey, FRIDAY. And to celebrate FRIDAY, Wade was... Well Wade was Wade.

Specifically, Wade was being Wade in the kitchen, having apparently been seized by a stroke of culinary genius.

Which meant, so it would seem, seeing how many pancakes he could stack on top of the other with a liberal amount of Nutella cementing each of them together.

Did he plan on eating it?

Hell yes he fucking did.

Also the kitchen may or may not be coated in Nutella, and it looks like Wade also managed to suss out where Bane had been hiding the various kitchen implements.

Not allowed to use them anymore his ass, Bane.

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Wade was in the kitchen. He could get up to a lot of trouble in the kitchen - and Cad Bane was used to that but it could get very annoying or very messy at times - quite often both. It's why things had to be hidden.

Even if Wade may take that more as a game.

It was hard to believe that Bane had put up with this behavior for so long but they had a sort of routine now and the bounty hunter - while not admitting it out loud - had grown somewhat attached to the other man. Enough that he did help him out if there was real trouble.

This, however, was not the case today. This was trouble caused by Wade himself and as Bane entered the kitchen he sneered in some distaste.

"I'm not cleaning this up."

"You always say that."

It was hard to miss the teasing tone in there, Wade peeking around from behind his stack of pancakes.

Hey, no mask today, they'd gotten to the point where the merc didn't feel like he needed it anymore around Bane.

"Come ooooon, don't you want like one? One pancake, Bane? Just one?"

Oh dear, that tone, as the bigger man cut a wedge off his magnificent pancake tower and waggled a forkful of it at Bane.

Bane certainly didn't care one way or the other about Wade's appearance and never had. He'd seen and dealt with far stranger and wasn't one to judge on looks. They weren't an indicator of talent and skill, which is what Bane focused merits on.

"I thought I'd told you before--"

He began speaking, attempting to snatch that fork away from his room-mate - but as he did so their hands touched and something happened, cutting off his words abruptly...

Something was very wrong.

"Meh meh meh Meeee-" Started Wade, as Bane reached out to snatch the fork away.

And then, all of a sudden...

Nothing. Nothing? Was it nothing?

Wade stilled, staring back at... well shit that was himself wasn't it?

He felt good. He felt amazing, actually. So many, many years of pain and all at once.

"Shit."

Meanwhile, Bane didn't even have time to register the visible changes. He suddenly was hit with a searing pain; a horrible burning sensation all over his body. He crumpled to the floor and gasped, bending over in agony. Had somebody attacked the house? Was it now on fire with a raging inferno all around them? That's what it somehow felt like. He couldn't mentally grasp anything right now, overwhelmed by the sudden pain. His eyes had squeezed shut, seeing spots.

Wade had, or felt like he had, all the time in the world to register it, everything, it was almost as if for once, time had slowed down. Screeched to a therapeutic halt.

And he would have taken that time, if he didn't just watch himself, or rather, Bane now, collapse onto the floor and curl in on himself.

Oh.

Yes.

"Cad, Cad, it's going to hurt worse down there." There were always a few things that took the edge off Wade's pain, and none of them involved laying crumpled on the floor.

Carefully, he moved to hook a hand under an arm, where clothing was, intent on not actually touching the damaged, sensitive skin.

That would make it worse.

"It's going to be hard, I'm gonna need you to stand up."

Something - someone - touched him. What happened? What was happening? His clarity was gone. His mind was buzzing and he hurt all over. He couldn't yet grasp what was going on. Wade's words filtered very slowly in but they were fuzzy - and... the voice sounded wrong. It sounded more like Bane was talking to himself. Except it was outside of his head. His fists clenched in frustration but that was a mistake and he shuddered more from the pain he wasn't used to feeling; teeth then clenched in a hiss of pain. He couldn't yet form words to speak or reply. He felt dizzy; his head was swimming.

"Bane."

Louder this time, knowing he'd have to speak up to break through.

"You have to stand up."

Not too loud, spoken slower, crisp and sharp.

"You need to get off the floor, we're going to the bathroom."

It was like some sort of weird echo. His voice. ....Have to stand up...

Bane gave a short nod as if in answer and allowed Wade to help him move.

Up Bane went, Wade ever, always careful not to touch the skin, slowly leading him towards the bathroom.

It was a trek the merc made every day without comment, or sometimes with a lot of comment, but never any indication of pain. Never a pause, always quick and with some sort of bounce in his step.

Hell once he'd even slammed the door so hard he'd nearly knocked it off it's hinges, skidded into the bathroom so fast he'd somersaulted into the tub.

Not now. Now was slow and methodical, easy and gentle, trying to ease Bane down onto the toilet before going to start the tub.

"The bath will help, trust me. Just keep listening to me talk, okay? It's gonna be fine. You'll be fine."

And he sounded so confident, when he said that. After all he'd know wouldn't he? Crisp and clean and precise, each word carefully enunciated so that it would break through the fog he knew was in there. Fog he'd learned after twenty years to clear out of the way enough to understand everything enough.

Fog that hopefully Bane would never have to get that used to.

The tub running, the scent of some kind of sweet smelling herb filling the air-

"Focus on listening to the water."

Bane tried to focus. His eyes were bleary as he opened them; the pain fogging all senses.

"What... what happened?"

His voice... It wasn't right. It wasn't his.

He winced and tried to see the other man. Hat, coat... Had Wade stolen his stuff...? Wait. Was he looking at himself? The thought made his head hurt more.

"What's going on?" The rasp wasn't his own but he still sounded hoarse right now.

"I don't know."

Essentially, but as far as the effects of whatever the hell happened-

"We've switched bodies."

Indeed, that was what looked like Bane at the tub, looked like Bane checking the water, looked like Bane going to the medicine cabinet to flick through a massive collection of bottles.

"I'm getting a bath ready, it'll help. Getting some pills out too, you're gonna need those. Tell me if anything changes, alright?"

He didn't mean painwise. Things, for Wade, could... change pretty quickly after all.

"Give it back," came the bleary response through the haze of pain.

Why would Wade do this? For a joke? Did Wade do this on purpose? Since his room-mate seemed so calm and had all the answers it felt like a logical assumption for the moment. He wasn't thinking too deeply about it yet. Like, it didn't make a lot of sense and while Wade could be very random and outlandish, deep down he did trust the man not to pull such a cruel trick out of nowhere, after all the time they'd spent together.

But logic and reasoning wasn't coming properly to him in his present state of shock.

"Don't know how or I would, Cad."

Because as nice as it was, to sit here with his brain clear and his body not on fire, Bane didn't deserve to live in hell.

At the very least, the body temperature water in the tub would take the man off pressure points, and begin to sooth angry, open sores. Pain pills in hand, he moved to gesture towards the tub again.

"C'mon, gotta take the clothes off and get in."

He'd not been wearing his suit when Bane first touched him after all. Just a shirt and boxers.

"I promise, this will help. It'll be a little easier to think when the pain dies down."

Not that much easier, but a little.

The words filtered through and he had his stubborn thoughts but fighting against anything right now seemed to be unwise. He felt weakened and lost and there was only that voice - his own voice, yet outside of himself - to guide him.

So he did as Wade said, letting the other man help him to get into the water.

The water, at the very least, would start to ease that pain. It would remove the pressure of standing and laying, and the room temperature water would still feel cool and soothing to hot and angry flesh.

Wade would settle down next to the tub again when he was sure Bane was comfortable, next offering up a handful of pills and some water.

"Don't bother asking if it's too much. It's not. Just take all of them and try to relax."

"You're... very calm," Bane said haltingly, trying to focus his gaze on his room-mate. A mirror. No. That was Wade. Somehow in his body while Bane... was in his? Of all the things to happen around here, this was certainly the most surreal.

"I know."

It should be more interesting to him, but... for once, he had the clarity to not sort out his own mental muck before he could take care of someone else.

He could easily cast aside his own personal issues in favor of making sure Bane, or rather, himself inhabited by Bane, didn't end up going mad permanently.

"I guess this is what you're like all the time, huh? ... Feels interesting."

Comfortable. Amazing. Free.

It couldn't last, and it shouldn't.

"Is anything starting to hurt less? Anything going on up here?"

He tapped his head, hesitant to ask if Bane was hearing anything other than himself. A suggestion was a bad thing to give right now, after all. Not with the way he knew his head was.

"It's... chaos," he managed to say through the whirlwind of thoughts. Yes, the pain did retreat a little, although it was still difficult to sharpen his own thoughts through this strange haze. He'd always been fairly healthy throughout his life. This was an unusual sensation.

"How do you think like this? Is this normal for you?" It was beginning to dawn on Bane what Wade must be putting up with physically and mentally. Maybe other behaviors would now make some sense.

"... Yeah. It is." He barely remembered what his mind was like before Weapon X. Before cancer.

Probably never as clear as Bane's mind, but at least perhaps, it'd been more quiet.

"I find ways. Doesn't always work. It's pretty normal most days."

Save for the rare ones when the merc became uncomfortably quiet, or straight up didn't leave his room.

Lucidity was never appreciated as well as it should have been either.

"Just tell me what's going on in there. Talking about it helps, even if you don't know all the words."

"I can't explain...," he grimaced and clenched a hand which he then put to his face. "It..."

The closest feeling he could grasp was how it had been when three powerful Jedi had attempted to mind trick him all at once. It was intrusive and burning and felt out of his control. He hated that feeling.

"It's not clear. It's like being attacked by something unseen. Within and without." Physically and mentally.

"Yeah... Yeah that's cancer. I guess you're not wrong."

Attacked inside, attacked outside. Inside by your own organs, your own cells, outside by the very air, the sun, the floor, your clothes-

"We'll find a way to put you back. I won't leave the apartment until I figure it out, alright?"

Because... well, Wade had years to adjust to this nightmare, many times inside the walls of a prison.

Bane had been hurled into a body that had been under siege for two decades.

He couldn't leave him here alone. Not like this, not with that brain or that body.

"How do you....? Is this why you...?" He couldn't seem to finish the sentences, gritting his teeth from all the sensations through his body. The soothing water only went so far as a balm.

"Did you... make somebody so mad they.... swapped us?" He thought that was a plausible idea. Wade could be antagonistic, even to him - and they usually got along. Who knows what kind of sorcery others could do around here and crossing the wrong people could be a grave mistake.

"Yeah." Just... to all of it. It wouldn't be wrong.

"No. Haven't talked to anyone much except randos at the club. No one's gotten upset."

Not this badly, at least.

"I don't know what's happened. I'm... I'm sorry, Bane."

There appeared to be less of the joking tone in Wade's words. He seemed sincere. More of the accusing thoughts and suspicion went away then. It wasn't his fault. It wasn't their fault. Something had just happened. Were they the only ones?

Right now there were more immediate needs than finding out if the rest of the city may be affected. They could only hope it would pass soon.

Bane didn't even think right now that maybe this was actually better for Wade - not having this to deal with. Cad Bane wasn't big on empathy.

"Then we'll have to... do what we can now. Help me up," he said, wanting to get out of the water, even if that may be a bad idea.

He'd rather him not think that, it might actually hinder switching it around. He'd rather not Bane find out the hard way what it was like to do heavy regeneration either, and that was... bound to happen at some point.

Even Bane wouldn't be able to resist the random urges that overtook him.

"Bane, you need to collect yourself first. If you get up now before the drugs kick in, even walking is going to be hard for you.

You've been me for twenty minutes, I've been me for forty five years. You're not going to be able to take it."

"Then what d'you suggest we do?" There was clear irritation in his slurred words but he didn't physically protest further, sitting back down grumpily. "I can't have you babysit me here."

"Wait for the drugs to kick in, then we'll think. Your mind will be a little clearer if you aren't hurting as much."

A little, might not be to any major degree but.

A little.

"It's not babysitting. Trust me. I don't want to leave you here like this, it-

It'll get worse."

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Wouldn't It Be Nice

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