Them Paper Boy Woes [Video | OTA]

[reachnotflexibility]

[Garrus does not look happy.

Which is surprising, considering all of his facial scarring has seemingly miraculously cleared up over night, almost as if a certain mask had attached to his face.]

Did anyone else have their paper thrown directly at them, or am I just that lucky?

[Seriously, he had just been walking home, minding his own business, then BAM! Paper to the face. Not cool.]

Comments

video;

[growsveggies]

The newspaper boy always has a rather... good aim it seems.

[She hears stories about things being broken but it seemed rare for people to actually be hit.]

Re: video;

[reachnotflexibility]

[As far as Garrus knows, he's the first to be a victim.]

I don't know if his aim is all that good; he breaks windows every day. What's impressive is that arm of his. The amount of force it would take to throw papers as high as he does? It's not possible in any being I know of. Maybe he's non-organic? I'd love to see the specs of that arm... I wonder if it uses some sort of hydraulic system to give him that power?

[Realizing that he's been talking to himself, Garrus sheepishly looks back up at Haru.]

Sorry, I, uh, got a little excited there.

video;

[growsveggies]

It's fine. I honestly don't know how he manages it.

[But it really was something to think about anyway.]

But it seems like it's something of interest to you anyway.

Re: video;

[reachnotflexibility]

[He rubs the back of his head.]

Yeah, I love figuring out how things work. And the force of his throw is an anomaly, so...

I wonder who would know?

[Video]

[generalgrievous]

I've had it thrown through my window.

[And here's one of your deputies, looking less cyborg and more alien but wearing a similar mask to his usual one - except this one is made out of bone and not metal.]

[Video]

[reachnotflexibility]

[As far as Garrus can tell, Grievous has just swapped out masks.]

I've had the window before too, but this time he didn't even aim at my place. Soon as he saw me he pegged me. Lost my coffee and everything.

[It's probably best that one one saw their guardian flailing and dropping his cup when he was hit. Not the image of a defender.]

I just can't figure out why he would do it in the first place. I've never done him any harm.

[Video]

[generalgrievous]

He can be very hostile. Perhaps he should be dealt with and punished for his actions.

[Video]

[reachnotflexibility]

No, I don't... I don't think we need to punish him for it. That seems a little harsh. I'm sure it was just a misunderstanding.

Video

[hamusukethewise]

It happened to me, soon after I arrived, that it did.

[ Hamusuke doesn't exactly have windows to break, since she lives in the forest. She couldn't fit in the Commons.]

Video

[reachnotflexibility]

[Now, you might think the giant hamster would cause some alarm, but when you're from a universe where elcor exist, a talking rodent isn't really that far out.]

Really? Someone needs to do something about this, then. This is a form of assault and it needs to be stopped.

Re: Video

[hamusukethewise]

No one has stopped him for property damage, that they have not.
His weaknesses have yet to be revealed.

Re: Video

[reachnotflexibility]

Has anyone tried just... talking to the guy?

[k2so]

I had happened in the past with the paperboy. At least no windows got broken this time? Our house is also suddently covered by bright lights and someone left a tree inside.

Garrus, what happened to your face?

[reachnotflexibility]

The Paper Boy put a tree in your house? That's... odd. That's not one of his normal services. Maybe Cassian ordered one?

[Garrus begins to pat his cheeks and wishes he had a mirror nearby.] What do you mean? What's wrong with my face?

[Nothing feels off and he had definitely seen the blue face markings when he was getting ready that morning. He has no idea what Kay could possibly be talking about.]

[k2so]

Not sure if it was him or someone else but there are weird decorations everywhere. I doubt it was Cassian because he's behaving like a jerkass now.

There's nothing wrogn with it, that's the thing. Did you get surgery for the scars?

[reachnotflexibility]

[Garrus' expression is deadpan.] Is that any different than normal? [Don't get him wrong, Cassian is a great guy, but Kay and Cass have been known to quarrel from time to time.]

[Garrus gives Kay an uncertain look as his hands drop from his face.] I've never gotten a scar in my life. Is your memory bank okay? Do you want me to take a look at it?

[ Video ]

[eternal_sailormoon]

It broke some of mine last time!

I don't know what I did?!

[ She's tearing up at the memory. Uh. ]

Re: [ Video ]

[reachnotflexibility]

[Oh shit he didn't mean to make anyone cry!]

I'm sure it was an accident! He breaks windows every time and they seem to be randomized. His aim just isn't all that great. P-please don't cry.

[Oh god he has no idea how to handle a crying woman what do]

[ Video ]

[eternal_sailormoon]

[ Usagi is made of dramatic emotions, Garrus, so sorry. For example, have a dramatic sniffle. ]

And he didn't even throw something directly at me!

Oh - I'm so sorry! I didn't even ask - are you okay?

video

[sarcastass]

... He threw the paper at you?

[Someone sounds, and looks, somewhat concerned]

... Well that was rude of him, why would he?

video

[reachnotflexibility]

[ Finally! ]

I have no idea! I've never even spoken to the guy. And let me tell you, the guy has some arm.

Re: video

[sarcastass]

That's terrible!

Doesn't he have a superior? Can't you talk to them and ask... that maybe he... not throw things at you anymore?

[look he has no idea how this shit works on earth, there's really nothing comparable here to what happens in heaven if you botch your job]

That can't be good for business, having your paper boy actually throw the paper at your subscribers...

video

[spacepeterpan]

Maybe he just thought you were really eager to read it.

[...is the Doctor squinting because he's thinking seriously about it, or because there's an unfamiliar sort of alien he's curious about?]

Re: video

[reachnotflexibility]

[He considers this, completely oblivious to the Doctor's fascination with himself.]

I mean, I guess it's possible? I do enjoy it every week, especially the puzzle section, but he could have shouted to get my attention or something so I would be prepared for the impact. Might have even been able to catch it.

[Regular Garrus could. This guy? He probably still would have been whacked in the face.]

Re: video

[spacepeterpan]

The puzzle section.

[It's such a rare pleasure for a member of a new, unfamiliar species to express interest in something so mundane, these days, the Doctor can't help but smile to himself.]

...well, yeah, it's a bit clever at times, I s'pose, isn't it. Anyway, I'm certain nothing's meant by it, well... "certain" is a strong word, but quite likely there's not. Anyway, could be worse, I know a planet where they write the news on bricks, infoblocks, they call them, although understandably, they're not usually thrown.