[ For the first few seconds of the feed, there's just a dog in chill sunglasses with hearts on his face staring at the screen. He licks his nose once, then suddenly a deep voice comes right out of that mouth in perfectly a understandable universal language. ]

Hey. Hey. Ya didn't hear it from me, but I heard there's this guy named Cupid and he went and lost his arrows. Every last one! [ The dog looks left to right. ] All he wanted was to show a bunch of dumb humans that he wasn't some baby like everyone keeps drawing him. Who would base love off a baby, huh? Huh? Really, that sounds like a shotgun wedding waiting to happen. Not very romantic if you've got a baby first. Not that there's anything wrong if you wanna do that. I'm a fan of puppy love. Love in all forms, if anyone tells you different tell 'em to kiss your ass!

[ Back on track-- ]

This dog needs your help. Hundreds of arrows all across the city and if you bring 'em to me, you'll get a real good treat. Seriously, free of charge. Thanks, you're great. Just don't touch the tips. And if ya do, and ya have a problem, don't say I didn't warn ya.

Cupid out!

[ Wait, he was trying to keep that he was Cupid quiet since screwing up wasn't on his agenda for his big introduction. There's a whimper, just like a normal dog, then... ] Ay Chihuahua, I just boned myself with that one. It's me, I'm Cupid, just bring me my arrows and there's some charms in it for the people who bring me the most.