genessia | 3rd ❋♛❋ [ game ]

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3rd ❋♛❋ [ game ] | video

Christmas time again, huh?

I wonder how many people I know are still here? It kind of seems fleeting. There were so many familiar faces of people here and now it seems rather lonely.

Not to say making new acquaintances is bad or anything, but I do miss the people that I used to speak to, or spend time with.

Does anyone feel like that sometimes?

Hehe, maybe I'll make something for everyone here for Christmas. I'm not the best cook, but I'm learning.

Duzie are you still around around.

I kind of want to see you right now.

[ There's a long silence before she breaks into a sincere smile. ] Anyway, sorry for being down in the dumps. This time of year makes me a little sad. Haha.

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[ Perhaps what he had said to her at that moment surprised her. It was rare that he would snap at her so seriously. It's not like she was intentionally trying to anger him. Ishtar stared at the screen silently as he slammed it shut.

Ishtar curled up in a ball. Maybe sh said too much and maybe she was taking advantage of him, but she couldn't help the way she felt right now. She felt miserable and alone. She's not used to being alone. She was spoiled by everyone she knew. They all coddled her and hugged her-- tucked her in when she needed it.

She should really stop thinking that this was going to be something like that for a while until he came. ]

I'm sorry...Duzie...

[ Ishtar bit back her tears. She shouldn't be hurting anyone like this. She knew better. She just had to toughen it up and run the course. Why was it so damn hard?! She thought it was going to be easy because she had done it so many times before but now... it seems stupid and futile. She was still the same useless person she was, unable to protect anyone, and unable to even do herself any good.

She did something she didn't do anymore. She was being selfish. Ishtar stared at him worried, concerned and perhaps guilty because she did something out of her usual self. ] They're not stupid. I mean it.

Edited 2015-01-28 02:11 (UTC)

[When Ishtar had spoken, Duzell took the initiative to cup her warm cheeks fully. A dark gaze in his eyes filled with confusion, yet very content. Can he simply avoid the question forever. He doesn't want things to change. Perhaps Duzell was spoiled that way. Duzell and Ishtar were the same in that respect.

He bent his body close to her. It was unnerving that she could hear the sobs which she was fiercely trying to calm. Was it really cowardly of him to avoid discussing things with Ishtar for so long? He was afraid to know the answer to that question.]

Stop apologizing for things which you aren't at fault for. It's useless.

[Then, he closed her eyes. If only he could lower his pride for just a bit and tell her, 'Please don't look at me'. But he was braver still and would never allow his pride to be shattered. There was always a wall he kept. A wall which Ishtar made her way through, time and time again.]

If so, then why is that question of consequence? Tell me.

[ Ishtar averted her eyes from him as he did that. She couldn't really face him right now. Not with a lot of negativity she was sputing. Ishtar only glanced at him briefly, before trying to make out why he was still staring at her in confusion. It was the spur of the moment comment, and Ishtar didn't really know why she said the things she did.

At least, her tears subsided for the time being. Her eyes were minorly red, but other than that nothing too surprising. He was really close, and it felt comfortable, and safe. She didn't really feel like that often anymore. It was always a sense of insecurity, and that something was always watching her back wherever she went. ][ She muttered, now in confusion. Ishtar felt his cool hand on her eyes and it blocked her from seeing what his expression was. She didn't know what he was doing but she reached up to grab his hand. ]

Duzell...what are you--

[ There's silence on her end. ]

...Because...I..well..

[ What was she trying obtain from it, she wondered? Her hand still rested on his, and she was still unable to see him. ]

[There was a wave of general relief that washed over him when he sensed she stopped from crying. He was cruel that way. He didn't want Ishtar to spend any of her emotions on him. He was not the person Ishtar was supposed to be with. Yet, he wanted her attention. He wanted her there beside him as he closed his eyes to sleep. He wanted long evenings of her talking endlessly as he sat there to listen to her musings. He wanted so many things, yet he's not even certain he has the right to demand them.

Duzell took in a long audible breath and remained silent as she did. When she spoke once more, he asked her hesitantly.]

You what?

What is it you want, Princess?

[ Even when he's saying that, he's been the only one that's been by her side for the longest since she had departed from their world. When she was here in these other worlds, he was always there for her, whether it was another version of him or not didn't seem to matter to her.

She still wanted to know his feelings. Like, honestly, how he felt about her and where they would go from here, because she didn't know anymore. She didn't know how strong her emotions for and it's not like she was going to see Darres anytime soon. She squeezed his cold wrist with her small hand as he questioned her. ]

I just want you by my side.

[ She mused, her expression hardly readable due to his hand being over her eyes still. ]

It's lonely, sometimes, when you're not around, like I feel like I'm missing something...

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3rd ❋♛❋ [ game ] | video

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