video

[sarcaskick]

[ The feed begins in a dark room - there's moonlight through a window somewhere offscreen, but not much else to illuminate the feed. There's not much to look at - a simple folding chair is all that's really in view for a little while, though there's the sound of shuffling footsteps in the background for a moment. Finally, a figure makes its way to the front of the camera. A giant, heart-shaped figure.

That's right. It's Huggy Heart.

He gives the camera a happy little wave before turning a bit, shifting back and forth as the person inside gets to work on taking the costume off. It's not a fast process - the stupid thing was pretty cumbersome - but eventually he manages to get the zipper in the back open, and with a bit more shifting around the costume falls to his feet.

Mercury stands there, hair a bit mussed and in a plain black t-shirt rather than his usual jacket. ]

Whew! That thing was not built for comfort.

[ He kicks the costume aside dismissively, falling back into the chair with his legs splayed out. ]

It was nice getting out and about for a while, though. That carnival was...

[ His smirk falls a bit. ]

Well, let's be honest. Pretty lame. Decent food, but not much else going for it. Didn't really wow me. Three out of ten at best. What I'm getting at here is that I'm bored.

[ He leans forward, elbows resting on his knees, narrowing his eyes at the camera as he lowers his voice. ]

Me and boredom are a baaaaad mix. Some of you might remember that! So consider this a heads-up that I'm going to be hitting the streets again. No more costumes, no more sneaking around. That lost its luster a while back. Just me and a few cities worth of friendly faces to mingle with. Can't wait to meet some of you face-to-face.

[ He leans back again, crossing one leg over the other - his pants and boots, at least, are the same as usual. His expression returns to his usual smirk, tone casual. ]

All that aside, anyone know any good jokes? Come on. Make me laugh.

Comments

[ Video ]

[enchantressofore]

[ So many questions, but (perhaps thankfully) she doesn't seem like she's even close to as enthused about it as she has been in the past. It's more morbid curiosity before bed than anything else, and... This guy just seems odd. ]

Why would you wear that thing in the first place if it is not comfortable?

[ For the moment she's ignoring the rest of what he's saying, frowning at him because... Well, there's a lot of questionable things about Mercury but she can get the one striking her as the most strange out of the way first. ]

[ Video ]

[sarcaskick]

Because it's so incredibly ugly that it's actually kind of hilarious.

[ ... Yes, that apparently is the only explanation he's going to offer. ]

[Video]

[redcinemareel]

[Honestly, she didn't expect this when the feed came on, but it was entertaining.]

It's a bit metaphorical, how you freed yourself from such a prison. [She tilts her head to the side, amused and curious.] I'm sure you'll be a heartbreaker out there~!

[Video]

[sarcaskick]

Heartbreaker...

[ There's a roll of his eyes, but a short laugh to go with it. ]

Well, I guess I'll take puns too. Beggars can't be choosers, right?

video;

[unhappy]

I've got one! What's the sound of one hand clapping?

[ Pause for effect. ] I don't know, ask Yang.

video;

[sarcaskick]

I can't believe it took you Xiao Long to tell me that one!

[ ... contrary to what he said earlier about puns, they're totally acceptable when made at someone else's brutal expense. ]

voice;

[whiteas]

Look in the mirror.

[ She's 100% sure she passed by that heart like at least 5 times and now she's really frustrated about him being there the whole time.. ]

video;

[sarcaskick]

[ He keeps the video feed running, mostly so she can see his smile widen. Some would call it a shit-eating grin. ]

Oooh, Ice Queen's got a mouth on her today!

[Video]

[southpaw_senpai]

[There was something about Mercury that got to Akihiko. The look in his eyes was... dangerous. He'd seen that look in many eyes on his training trip, so have a red-cape wearing dude, Merc.]

If you're bored, I'd be happy to entertain you.

[Video]

[sarcaskick]

What do you do? Card tricks? Musical theatre? Pole dancing?

[Video]

[aurabble]

[Are you fucking kidding right now. He thought you were just weird and socially awkward he feels so betrayed.]

We're not here to entertain you. Get over it.

[Video]

[sarcaskick]

[ Sorry, Jaune - when it comes to weird and socially awkward, you remain the king. ]

Oh, no! The scary man's telling me what to do! Someone, help me!

[Video]

[azaleafae]

Well, I'm curious...

[She's actually not, but some of her clan members who are listening in are.]

What do you find entertaining?

[Video]

[sarcaskick]

Interpretive dance.

[text] idk why i assumed huggy heart was a bear

[ineffaceable]

[ so seto was going to ignore this stupidity until he noticed that some individuals (from weiss' world, presumably, seeing as she's all threatening over it) actually seemed to be upset by this idiot. which is kind of confusing, considering he literally just wandered around in a heart suit. how threatening could he be?

then again, pegasus had the power to steal souls, and that idiot literally played with cartoons all day. so.

blah. ]

Do people want you dead that badly, that you're forced to wear a costume in public?

[video] a question for the ages

[sarcaskick]

[ He takes a second to read the question, humming briefly ]

Some people may have hinted as much, yeah.

Video

[ringed_fate]

People really will cosplay as anything here. [Always honest in his reactions.] You should have gone as a Dragoon or something with light armor. I'm not much good at jokes - I can do riddles though! [Oh Bakura....just stop talking to Mercury.]

Video

[sarcaskick]

... Yeah. Thanks for the tip, man. I'll remember that for next time.

[ Is it possible to ooze sarcasm? Like, literally from his pores? ]

Riddles... ehhhh, I'll give one a shot, I guess. Not really my style, but what the heck. Fire away.

Video

[fade_to_black]

The only way I'd make you laugh was if I thought you might suffocate and die in the process. [No love loss there, Merc. ]

Video

[sarcaskick]

Are you saying you want to leave me breathless?

[ He fans himself, fluttering his eyelashes. ]

How bold.

video;

[sizedoesntmatter]

You know if your hat bored there are always plenty of games one can play.

[Which is true, but probably the least helpful thing right now.]

video;

[sarcaskick]

Games are only as much fun as their stakes.

audio;

[cantbackout]

I wouldn't mind having a sparring opponent every now and then if you're that bored.

[If nothing else, it would help keep fit. Not that he's going to be a judge of anything this guy does.]

audio;

[sarcaskick]

[ 'eyyyy it's titan-guy! ]

I'm eternally that bored. It's the curse of my existence.

video;

[pathosis]

[ something about the carnival mascot being mildly threatening when he's bored? ]

A girl walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a double entendre, so he gave it to her.

video;

[sarcaskick]

[ He blinks. Frowns for a moment. Rolls his eyes in thought... ah! Okay, it took a second to pick the wording apart, but he gets it now. You get a laugh, stranger. ]

Not too shabby, pal.

video;

[get_dunked]

"... Hey.

Uh... Did ya hear 'bout the guy who got hit in the head with a soda can? He was lucky it was...a soft drink."

video;

[sarcaskick]

[ Talking skeleton.

...

Okay. He's over it. Moving on.

It's not the best joke of all time, but it does get a snort at least. ]

I've heard worse. Then again, I guess it literally wouldn't be any skin off your back if I said otherwise.

audio

[quietaura]

I think we might all be waiting for you to die of boredom.

Video;

[sarcaskick]

Better than dying of other things! Not that I'd know.