two ticks: text

[stairsbro]

like three days ago was my buddys birthday according to the calendar here
and usually something significant goes down
like the world gets destroyed or the sis hooks up with a vampire etc etc
but nothing life changingly important happened
at least not anything even vaguely related to my shit
some shit went down prior to the month starting but im not counting that
not to downplay how royally messed up tv kidnappers are
but i mean like as an april thing
im probably missing out on the significant goings on
of any universe that fucking nerd is in
by being here instead
idk what the point of this was
fucking opening pointless memos like karkat now to ramble at myself
guy would have a field day
fuck
anyway
movies
thinking of making some since danny pointed out the pickings are limited
i think i can pump out a masterpiece while im doing diddly fucking squat here
but i have no money for a camera or film or like shit you actually need to do this
or anything at all because i spent all my bills
so does anyone wanna hire me
what you got i bet i could do it with my sick resume
swiss army knife dave thats me
and id rather go the contributing to society route than literally steal everyones money
make out like a bandit
ya blink and suddenly im the richest mother fucker in this eerie place
porrims gonna have to give me the nice room
with the pimped out bathroom thats got the toilet separate from the sink by a door
god damn thats fancy
but hire me so i can also actually pay her for my loitering
shes gonna come to her senses any day now
and realize what a shit investment letting me have a room was

also everyones talking about that hot weiss chick cept the paper that doesnt hit you in the face
instead of addressing the real issue here
which is that someone decided it was a good idea to unleash that unholy porcelain pedobait army upon the place straight from the animes
if your job offer is located near or in fayren im gonna take a pass and say hell fucking no to your wacked out lolita puppet show over there
what the actual fuck

Comments

Text

[greenmagick]

If you like flowers I can give you a job.

[stairsbro]

that is not the first offer i was expecting
like
at all
flowers
sure i like flowers
i havent given a lot of thought to them
and never put one in my living space
but my friend would garden
oh no wait she grew veggies
i know OF flowers
theyre pretty and smell nice right
right ??
i can do flowers
i cant believe you read this and thought
yeah that guy sounds delicate enough for flowers
idk how to feel about that but ok

what would i be doing with flowers

[greenmagick]

Selling them.
When I read this it just sounded like you needed work. It isn't a difficult job and I could use the help. Unless you don't want too.
It sounds like you're good at talking to people.

[stairsbro]

i guess
no its cool
ill sell your flowers
sell the flowers like they dont just pop out of the ground
check out this god damn gardenia
look at this beauty
sniff it
no dude seriously sniff it
it smells like spring and sunshine

[greenmagick]

I also have an opening as a gardener too but I think you'd have more fun at the front of the store.

text;

[thelastdruid]

The theater might have some stuff I can borrow if you're interested.

Can we not talk about the doll army?

Listen, thanks for the assist, by the way.

text;

[stairsbro]

yeah??
sign me up as interested in borrowing

man nathan why would you even bring it up again to ask
let us never speak of this

yeah yw
what good is being a knight if you cant provide quality backup or whatever

text;

[thelastdruid]

I'm not promising anything, but I'll see what I can do.

Bring up what?

I'd be dead right now if you hadn't been there.

text;

[stairsbro]

you can do it
its in the name of art and our growing bond of broship dude

what are you even talking about

oh
probably not

text;

[thelastdruid]

Okay, okay. I'll see what I can do.

You said not to bring that up. Bring up what exactly? Get it?

I'm just being honest, "dude".

[youfool]

Oh, I wouldn't worry about any forthcoming evictions from Porrim. Coming to her senses is something of a rarity.

[Teasing]

[stairsbro]

thats a dickish statement dude

[youfool]

[Another who took light mockery as grievous insult. Ted figured he needed a way to disarm the Sensitive Sally's. Nothing came to mind just then, so he'd do the usual genuflecting.]

It's meant with a lighter heart, though I apologize for any offense.

[stairsbro]

apology rejected
you cant take that back with a simple jk dude
my ass is good and firmly chapped over this disrespectin
you done fucked up this first impression
whathcu going to do about it

[youfool]

[Good, at least, that he reckoned this as the first impression, and not when he vomited on him. That was embarrassing.]

"Good question; I hear those are hard to fix. What do you recommend?"

[redcarnation]

if your movies are going to be as incoherent as this post was, our cinemas are doomed

[stairsbro]

lady you dont even know how doomed youre gonna be if i dont make my movies
you think this is incoherent just you wait
ive seen the future
its all cinematically down hill from here
cgi spectacles with zero fucking plot
my shits gonna make you think

[redcarnation]

you're only going to make me think if you manage to keep me awake through the whole movie though ♥

[stairsbro]

dont need it to keep you awake
you already paid the ticket price if its there to put you asleep
oh shit
thinking wasnt about the movie
what i was making you made you think about were your life choices

[redcarnation]

isuke is not so poor that she would get hung up on a measily ticket price

people won't pay a ticket price twice though, so you'll have to find something smarter next time

text;

[callmeimouto]

Hey. You should hang out with me later today. You sound a little lonely, talking about all that other.... stuff, that usually goes on.

I don't have special powers or anything, so I hope I'm not too boring.

text;

[stairsbro]

what
whered you get that crazy ass idea
im not any bit of lonely
i dont miss people
fuck those guys leaving me alone in another world
like literally fuck them
ok maybe not literally
no no wait not maybe
definitely not literally cause one is my sister
anyway
youre not boring
we can hang i guess
if YOURE lonely and wanna be not boring with me

text;

[callmeimouto]

As if I'm lonely!! Shut up already!

You wanna get some ice cream?

text;

[stairsbro]

ok
where do you wanna meet up

text;

[callmeimouto]

Where are you? I can find you.