three ticks: video

[stairsbro]

[ Dave said he was going to do it. And here it is.

YOU ARE NOW WATCHING A MOVIE. It's exactly 1 hour 35 minutes long. This is a romantic lifetime movie - only the characters are all sharks (the actors are wearing cheap shark costumes) They are not in water nor is it ever referenced that they're sharks outside of a few puns. They're just sharks. The dialog can be considered really funny and it's clear this is a satirical work. The dialog can also be considered cringe worthy depending on one's sense of humor or if taken too seriously. The acting spans from being great to awful. The main female lead is intentionally played like she's reading her script off cue-cards and at one point actually pulls out the script from behind her fin and corrects a line she said wrong. The male lead could be an Oscar-worthy performance had the material not been completely ridiculous. The side-characters contain the stereotypical BFF, the leads' boss/a hammerhead shark, the parents, a grumpy neighbor, three competing love interests, a rival they keep saying is a love interest, Doctor Dorsal - who shares the grim news, a baby shark (played by a stuff animal), and a few others.

It takes a bit to notice but every shark is played by Dave using different silly voices. One scene has every character on camera at the same time somehow. Plus a few extras in the background (also all Dave in a shark costume.) Movie magic?

The last 26 minutes are all animated, likely because he couldn't figure out how to have that MASSIVE EXPLOSION in the big death sequence without actually blowing something up AND/OR didn't want to kiss himself when it came time for the leads to do that. It's really poorly animated/drawn in his unique style. The movie ends of course with "Fin." The ending is left open-ended for interpretation.

Love it or hate it, at least the original soundtrack was amazing. ]

Comments

Video;

[imaginationswoes]

[Airy sits and watches the whole thing from beginning to end. In fact, she doesn't even know what she had been doing prior to the movie's start. When she replies to Dave she's munching on popcorn; she had missed five minutes in the middle to make the popcorn but the movie had needed snacks.

There is a bright grin on her face and her eyes were teary from laughing so hard.]

That was amazing. Did you write all of that?

[That's cool.]

Video;

[stairsbro]

Wrote, directed, stared-in, edited, animated, illustrated, catered, costumed, and orchestrated. Yep. Camera borrowed from Nathan.

Video;

[imaginationswoes]

Oh? Is that what you used the camera for?

[She remembers hearing something about that.]

That's pretty cool. Are you going to do that as a job or just for fun?

Video;

[stairsbro]

For funsies. I was fucking bored and ended up with some extra me around after taking a snooze at the docks and, like, you gotta utilize your Daves when you got them. But, yeah, I'm using this to gauge interest.

Video;

[imaginationswoes]

What the gauge reading?

[Airy smiles at him. She wants to write but she's only gotten a few silly stories together so far.]

video;

[livable]

[ What the hell did she just watch. ]

Why?

[ That was her main question tbh. ]

video;

[stairsbro]

Irony.

video;

[livable]

I'm guessing you're not going to explain that.

video;

[stairsbro]

It's funny, doc.

[ringed_fate]

[He's not sure he wants to insult whatever artist's interpretation of....whatever this is. After all, it is someone's creative expression and they are allowed it, he supposes.]

I....well....that was different. [He kind of laughed at some of it. But he wasn't sure if it was supposed to be funny.]

[stairsbro]

Mmhm. I'm going to put this review on the back of the DVD box, okay?

[ he really will if he bothers to box this at any point ]

[ringed_fate]

....y-you don't have to.

[He blinks, feeling awkward. He's not sure this guy is serious or not.]

[stairsbro]

I think I do, man.

[accidental video]

[offwithhishat]

[ Jefferson didn't know why he'd watched every second of that. He really didn't.

He stared at the screen for quite a while after it was over, trying to figure out how to even process everything he'd witnessed.

Abruptly, he began laughing. It started as a few chuckled but quickly erupted into full on hysterics. He put the phone down and put his hands to his face, muffled laughter still coming from behind. The hell else could he do besides laugh? ]

[video]

[stairsbro]

[ The laughing starts and he's all "Hell yeah. Mission accomplished." And then it just ...keeps going. ]

Yo, chuckles. Are you breathing?

[video]

[offwithhishat]

[ He pulled his hands from his face and scrambled to pick up the device again. How had he even hit the video button? ]

I'm -- wow, I'm sorry. I didn't even know this thing was on. I just --

[ He choked back another laugh. ]

That was brilliant.

[video]

[stairsbro]

[ maybe he's funnier than he thought???? that's good, right? ego boost. ]

Thanks, man. I've got more of this crap. Airy wants sequels or whatever. Other films? Who knows. Point is. I am now a one-man machine of media. I'm going to dominate it all. It's happening. Has happened in an alternate reality that one time where Betty Crocker ruled the planet or some shit. I wasn't there. I mean, I was, but like... not me-me. You know what I'm saying? You don't know what I'm saying. Never mind. Thank you.

video;

[callmeimouto]

[kirino doesn't know whether to laugh, cry, or just glare at everything dave was doing. it was incredibly embarrassing to watch, but it was also hilarious because it was dave that was doing it. in the end, she just ended up laughing- and laughing pretty hard.

once she had calmed down she was wiping her eyes, she really couldn't believe he did all this.]

Wh-what was that?! I couldn't.... aahh you were all the roles! Hahaha are you serious?! [yeah, she had a great time watching it.]

I want more of whatever that was!

video;

[stairsbro]

[ he's proud of himself for getting any kind of reaction like that. ]

As serious as a shark attack. [ says the guy STILL wearing that shark costume, it seems. there's a fake mustache on this character. ]

Well, damn. If you want more then I have to oblige, huh?

video;

[callmeimouto]

Why do you still have the costume on?!

[yeah no, she's just laughing again.] Well yeah- I haven't laughed like that in a really long time!

video;

[stairsbro]

What costume?

Good. Bring on the fucking gigglefits.

video;

[redcarnation]

[ She lets out a demonstrative little yawn as she turns on the video feed and then smiles. ]

Now I didn't even wind up paying anything ♥

video;

[stairsbro]

Holy shit. Did you spite watch my movie?

video;

[redcarnation]

'Watch'. Isuke had it running in the background while doing her nails.

[ A perfectly manicured hand is briefly waved across the screen. ]

video;

[stairsbro]

You watched my movie.