genessia | Video

[Oh look, someone is actually on the screen this time. Treasure it, he usually adores his voice function. Why bother with video when you can't see?

In any case, here he is, the phone clearly propped up, because he's obviously holding an entirely different phone in his hands. Midge is nowhere to be seen. Maybe he's behind the actually filming phone.]

There's been some discussion on the network about a new scourge sweeping our tightly knit, familial little community. Now, I don't mean to scare anyone-

[And he does, actually, look dreadfully sincere. His expression is almost sweetly concerned, though the effect is marred somewhat by the sunglasses. Can't really pull off wide eyed concern with no eyes.]

But I'm just going to have to be frank with you, please, those with weak constitutions may want to leave the room.

... I'm sorry, Genessia... But I have heard... that people are being mean on the internet.

[There's a sharp violin sting behind the camera filming. Ah, that's where Midge went.]

I know, I know. I can't believe it either. People, being mean! To other people! Anonymously!

It's certainly something I never fathomed would happen, we're all such lovely people here. Not to worry though. I am here to give a brief lesson on what to do if someone on the internet is mean to you.

[Yeah. There's another violin sting. Szel gestures to the phone in his hand, not exactly the one from the city, but close enough in design.]

Please, pay attention. This is all highly technical, complicated jargon I'm about to start using. It's language primarily used by us experts in the technological and social media arts.

Now. Midge, I need you to pretend you are a mean person on the internet.

[The violin sting sounds dutifully, before a soft, lisping, mincing and demure voice sweetly croons out from off screen, behind the phone.]

I do not care for your glasses, for I am a low brow and simple cretin.

[The demon smiles, gesturing to the phone in his hand]

That is our insult of the hour. Now, while I could very well sit here and yell at the mean person on the internet-

[VIOLIN STING]

For the next half hour, it is highly encouraged for all those without specialized training to do the following. If you would kindly pay attention, please take note of the button, here, at the bottom of the phone.

Now, I have found that if you press this button-

[Which he does, and the screen on the phone in his hand promptly goes black as the device shuts off]

It effortlessly silences any and all instances of mean people on the internet-

[VIOLIN STING]

wherein you are free to go outside and make yourself familiar with the grass.

I believe that should cover todays PSA of mean people on the internet.

[VIOLIN STING]

Thank you.

And stay safe.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[They have to resist replying to this and clapping and laughing. They have been trying to keep up this good kid persona, thus the anonymous replies to idiots on the network.

So they just... send a text anonymously in reply to this.]

I can't believe that me simply trying to help an idiot to stop being an idiot resulted in something so glorious. Makes me almost sad I'm anonymous.

[Midge, of course, caught the text. Whatever the bug saw, so did Szel, so the answer was prompt]

I have not been this engaged in this network since I got here. I'm so happy I have an excuse to interact now.

Well then, happy birthday to you Pops. Or whatever gift giving occasion you want to use, we can say this is my gift to you.

[Softly, clearly Szel speaking with the insect-]

Midge, pops?

You may appear to be older than the writer, master.

Ah-

Regardless, you've been exceedingly helpful. I'll always have you in my heart, anonymous.

Oooh, your heart but not your soul?

I guess I can settle for that.

Edited 2017-08-27 06:30 (UTC)

Well I don't have at least one of those, so it'll just have to do for now.

Ooooh, are you another soulless thing?

[Szel has just become more interesting.]

It's all very technical, it's simply easier to say I cannot, nor ever could possibly contain a soul.

That's interesting, pops.

I was not having troubles dealing with people online!

And even though the Doctor was mad about it, he was just mad in general.

Is this really necessary?

Let me think.

... I think I'm hilarious, Midge what do you think?

[At this point, he moves, and it's very clear there's a glass of some brilliant amber liquid in his hand.

Might explain a few things. The voice off camera sounds again]

Your humor is impeccable, Master. I think this was brilliant.

[With a smile that might be a touch too jagged to be comfortable, he directs his attention to the camera]

There, you see? Highly necessary.

And who said anything about this being about you? Midge, did I say any names?

Oh no master, this was completely devoid of anyone in mind, of course.

Of course! That's what I said!

[FACE PALMS.]

[HARD.]

Riiiiiiiiight. It's all just a coincidence. Of course.

Oh! See, she understands.

Terribly clever, master.

[Giggles in spite of herself.]

Don't think you're off the hook that easily!

You have one thing wrong. People are being mean on the network.

It's not the internet.

When you can render yourself entirely anonymous, and thus disconnect yourself from the other person you are speaking with and avoid all possible retribution for being difficult, you've successfully replicated everything that's wrong with communicating on the internet, so you've essentially replicated the social aspect of the internet.

To claim it is not the internet because it lacks certain features is simple minded, it's a network that connects a massive amount of people to each other, strangers and friends alike.

And is that not, technically, what the internet is?

It just has less pornography on it.

Yes, but we already have two types. The network that we can use and the one that is connected to the natives and us for other various means.

It's actually why I prefer the term network when using this device since otherwise, I get confused between the two. Besides if someone was smart enough to actually look into most anon cases they could very much limit it down and figure out who it is because the network is limited to those with necklaces whereas the other type would be harder because of the sheer numbers.

[Yes, he looks like a classic emo kid. No, he doesn't really care.

He does chuckle when the feed initializes, though.]

Isn't everyone mean on the internet?

[ur precious]

One would imagine that is, in fact, the definition of the internet.

A massive conglomeration of terrible people.

[He nods, and then looks immediately apologetic, though he's fairly certain the man can't see either of those things.]

Yeah, it's got something to do with the anonymity of it all, I think.

Are people seriously freaking out about this?

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