'Szelhamos' (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
sarcastass) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
genessia2017-08-27 12:27 am
sarcastass) wrote in genessia2017-08-27 12:27 am
Entry tags:
Video
[Oh look, someone is actually on the screen this time. Treasure it, he usually adores his voice function. Why bother with video when you can't see?
In any case, here he is, the phone clearly propped up, because he's obviously holding an entirely different phone in his hands. Midge is nowhere to be seen. Maybe he's behind the actually filming phone.]
There's been some discussion on the network about a new scourge sweeping our tightly knit, familial little community. Now, I don't mean to scare anyone-
[And he does, actually, look dreadfully sincere. His expression is almost sweetly concerned, though the effect is marred somewhat by the sunglasses. Can't really pull off wide eyed concern with no eyes.]
But I'm just going to have to be frank with you, please, those with weak constitutions may want to leave the room.
... I'm sorry, Genessia... But I have heard... that people are being mean on the internet.
[There's a sharp violin sting behind the camera filming. Ah, that's where Midge went.]
I know, I know. I can't believe it either. People, being mean! To other people! Anonymously!
It's certainly something I never fathomed would happen, we're all such lovely people here. Not to worry though. I am here to give a brief lesson on what to do if someone on the internet is mean to you.
[Yeah. There's another violin sting. Szel gestures to the phone in his hand, not exactly the one from the city, but close enough in design.]
Please, pay attention. This is all highly technical, complicated jargon I'm about to start using. It's language primarily used by us experts in the technological and social media arts.
Now. Midge, I need you to pretend you are a mean person on the internet.
[The violin sting sounds dutifully, before a soft, lisping, mincing and demure voice sweetly croons out from off screen, behind the phone.]
I do not care for your glasses, for I am a low brow and simple cretin.
[The demon smiles, gesturing to the phone in his hand]
That is our insult of the hour. Now, while I could very well sit here and yell at the mean person on the internet-
[VIOLIN STING]
For the next half hour, it is highly encouraged for all those without specialized training to do the following. If you would kindly pay attention, please take note of the button, here, at the bottom of the phone.
Now, I have found that if you press this button-
[Which he does, and the screen on the phone in his hand promptly goes black as the device shuts off]
It effortlessly silences any and all instances of mean people on the internet-
[VIOLIN STING]
wherein you are free to go outside and make yourself familiar with the grass.
I believe that should cover todays PSA of mean people on the internet.
[VIOLIN STING]
Thank you.
And stay safe.
In any case, here he is, the phone clearly propped up, because he's obviously holding an entirely different phone in his hands. Midge is nowhere to be seen. Maybe he's behind the actually filming phone.]
There's been some discussion on the network about a new scourge sweeping our tightly knit, familial little community. Now, I don't mean to scare anyone-
[And he does, actually, look dreadfully sincere. His expression is almost sweetly concerned, though the effect is marred somewhat by the sunglasses. Can't really pull off wide eyed concern with no eyes.]
But I'm just going to have to be frank with you, please, those with weak constitutions may want to leave the room.
... I'm sorry, Genessia... But I have heard... that people are being mean on the internet.
[There's a sharp violin sting behind the camera filming. Ah, that's where Midge went.]
I know, I know. I can't believe it either. People, being mean! To other people! Anonymously!
It's certainly something I never fathomed would happen, we're all such lovely people here. Not to worry though. I am here to give a brief lesson on what to do if someone on the internet is mean to you.
[Yeah. There's another violin sting. Szel gestures to the phone in his hand, not exactly the one from the city, but close enough in design.]
Please, pay attention. This is all highly technical, complicated jargon I'm about to start using. It's language primarily used by us experts in the technological and social media arts.
Now. Midge, I need you to pretend you are a mean person on the internet.
[The violin sting sounds dutifully, before a soft, lisping, mincing and demure voice sweetly croons out from off screen, behind the phone.]
I do not care for your glasses, for I am a low brow and simple cretin.
[The demon smiles, gesturing to the phone in his hand]
That is our insult of the hour. Now, while I could very well sit here and yell at the mean person on the internet-
[VIOLIN STING]
For the next half hour, it is highly encouraged for all those without specialized training to do the following. If you would kindly pay attention, please take note of the button, here, at the bottom of the phone.
Now, I have found that if you press this button-
[Which he does, and the screen on the phone in his hand promptly goes black as the device shuts off]
It effortlessly silences any and all instances of mean people on the internet-
[VIOLIN STING]
wherein you are free to go outside and make yourself familiar with the grass.
I believe that should cover todays PSA of mean people on the internet.
[VIOLIN STING]
Thank you.
And stay safe.
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