genessia | text - PSA from Attleton Guardian's office

I guess, I don't really know. I haven't really had another commander ever anyway. Just the Superior.

[He tilts his head.]

I get hard tasks all the time, but sometimes I'm just not good at stuff.

[It's a weird hypothetical anyway considering Cassian isn't doing anything like that, but Demyx is pretty sure his performance wouldn't be better under anyone else.]

[ Cassian smiles a little to himself. ]

What I'm trying to say is... You would be a hard task, no doubt about it.

[ But he wouldn't shy away from it. ]

I wish we'd met in my own world.

[ And yet deep down he knows he probably wouldn't have given him a chance there, he'd been so caught up in his own daily grind and horrors that he hadn't been able to see the hardships others faced. He's still not all that good at it, though it's easier with Demyx, who reminds him oddly of Kay just around his reprogramming. ]

You need someone who knows your strengths and weaknesses and gives you tasks you'll be good at.

[He laughs a little bit and offers a little shrug.]

Probably. There's a lot of stuff I'm not that great at, like hand to hand combat. I'm not that strong, you know?

[Well compared to some of his companions, he didn't stand a chance.]

Yeah, maybe. Not being in my world is always nice.

[He thinks for a few minutes.] I'm good at sneaking around, and talking to people. When they need to talk to people, they send me, usually. Magic, I'm pretty good at that. Getting information. That kinda thing.

[ Cassian's face softens as he permits some affection to show in his eyes. ]

Well, that's a start, isn't it? [ The corners of his mouth twitch upwards again. ] That means if we had met in my world, you'd be working with me. In Rebel Intelligence.

[ Or he would be an Imperial, most likely, since that's the easier way to go about life. But Cassian doesn't want to think about that. Besides, Bodhi deserted and so did many others. ]

Getting information from people is an important skill, as is blending in. It takes long and hard training for many operatives.

Yeah, I guess so! [It's possible he could be better at other aspects, if he had any motivation at all to improve himself. He didn't really.]

Huh, cool, I don't know anything about your world though, I've never been there.

[He tilts his head a bit. Training?]

I guess, but I've always been pretty good at that. People never had a hard time talking to me, when I had to talk to them. [He's naturally inclined to be chatty and some people seem to find that comforting when speaking to someone, but that doesn't mean he can' be mean, he certainly can. It depends on what the situation calls for.]

You're good at conversation, yes. I have no doubt you're good at getting information from people, too.

[ He puts even Cassian at ease with his manner, so... ]

It's a skill, trust me. You either have it naturally or you have to work hard to acquire it. I had to work hard for it. I'm not naturally good at socializing, but a recruiter has to be able to win people over. Or, you know, encourage them. If there's need for that.

[ In some ways maybe their jobs are similar. ]

[He smiles and ducks his head, because that's kind of like praise and he likes hearing it.]

Yeah? I never thought about it like that, I mean I'm like this all the time. Normally, I mean.

[No one taught him anything, but they sure did put his skill to good use, the other Nobodies are a lot less socially adept.]

Oh, I can encourage people too, if I have to.

[But he doesn't want to get all scary towards Cassian.]

[ Cassian gives an approving nod. It's okay, he doesn't mind the scariness. All part of the job description, after all. ]

I'm sure you can, considering who you worked for I'm sure you had a lot more leeway with it than I ever had, too.

[ And Demyx having been a villain - not just a victim of manipulation, but someone who actively committed atrocious deeds - is something he doesn't wish to dwell on. It's so much easier to think of him as a victim of circumstances beyond his control. ]

But that's a skill, too. Pushing without pushing too far.

Uh, sort of? Maybe? I don't know, it depended on what I was hoping to get out of it, or they were anyway.

[Even though it's a fact he is a victim of circumstance, he still had to be active and participate to keep his life, and that means he has some unsavoury skills lurking beneath the surface, even if he doesn't seem terribly inclined to use those skills at the moment. He's not naturally inclined to those things, unlike his ability to be friendly, chatty and positive.]

I guess so, but it kinda depends. I wasn't very successful with Hades, but seriously, have you seen him? He's the God of the Underworld! His hair is fire! He wasn't scared of me.

[ Ummm...

Cassian blinks slowly and stares at his communicator as if it's turned in a jelly monster. ]

I feel like this conversation has just gotten derailed.

[ What the kriff even. ]

I don't understand a word of that and I'm not sure I want to.

Oh it's not important, just one of the missions I did...that I failed. Saix was pretty mad.

[It's not important Cassian.]

Oh.

[ Yes, yes, it is important to him now.

His voice goes lower, softer again. Trust me vibes.]

Were you punished for your failure?

[He shifts a little. It depends on what Cassian means.]

Not exactly. We're really busy and short handed but my orders changed. Bring Roxas back at any cost.

[He signed his death warrant.]

Did you do it?

[ He keeps his voice carefully neutral now, no judgement. He wants a honest answer, after all, not the one that Demyx might think he wants. ]

[He shakes his head.]

I haven't found him again yet. I was looking...

[Kind of. Unenthusiastically.]

I'm not much of a threat to Roxas. Zexion says it's my fault I'm in this mess.

Zexion and Xemnas and Saix, they all have a lot of opinions on you, don't they? But I don't see any of them being helpful. It's very easy to point a finger and blame others, especially when you set them a task they're bound to fail.

[ Cassian heaves an annoyed sigh. ]

You're better than that.

Well yeah of course I'm going to fail! It wasn't my job to be stronger than everyone else!

It should have been Axel's job but he's kinda running off places and I doubt they know where he is but then they wanted me to do it.

Not really better, I'm not stronger than Roxas. [Sora, he means Sora, but he's stubborn about naming people.]

They want me to fail.

Of course they want that.

[ Frustration laces his voice again. Failure and then death. And there's nothing Cassian can do about it, that's something in a different world. He still doesn't even know how being Heartless works, biologically. ]

But you're better than them. Not stronger. Better is different. You'll remember that difference, given a little more time.

Yeah, this time they want that.

[He knows, but he's cornered and thinking about this makes him feel and he doesn't like it. It's not good.]

Better is different? I don't know how I'm better. I'm better at playing sitar, but...

[The way they judge skill and worth is usually in mission success and combat.]

[ So does Rebel Intelligence, to some extent, but there's more to it. So much more. Now if only it were easier to find the right words... Once again, Cassian wishes it were one of his leaders here instead of him. They would know what to say. ]

We're stronger for our skills, but we're better people for the choices we make. You're starting to make better choices than your Superior ever will. That makes you better in my eyes.

[He can't help it, he's blushing.]

...Thanks Cassian, I'm trying. I'm going to try. That's all I can do, right?

It is. And you're doing fine. Just... keep doing what you do.

[ He gives him another small smile. It's hard not to find Demyx endearing, even for him. ]

I'll hear from you soon, alright. Maybe I'll see you at the Halloween party before Kay and I leave town for a little while.

Okay, thanks I will!

[He hums and sighs.]

Yeah, I'm going to that, Larxene's got me going as Poseidon.

[ That earns him just a blank look from the space man.

Cultural confusion incoming, Demyx. ]

Who or what is a Poseidon?

He's the God of the Sea!

[It's totally cool, and perfect for him.]

text - PSA from Attleton Guardian's office

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