text + billboards of the front cover all over every city

[unhappy]

[ Within the book, it just contains ridiculous blog-style stories about how Cassian used to use pink milk to bake cookies on the veranda of his frozen planet home with his mother, then wake up because it was just a dream. His mother is dead, his life is shit. He must rebel. So he makes angry pink cookies.

Each recipe has a story of similar caliber, and most of the recipes are absolute shit. They are all next to weird pictures, some of him just barbecuing and smiling warmly at K2SO or some just making awful candid faces. The back cover photo is probably photoshopped but the rest seem weirdly.. real... (Thanks Neo.)

There are 20 different recipes including: a canned tuna christmas tree, how to make grilled cheese with a clothing iron, some kind of gelatinous salad monster, hot Dr. Pepper, and many other atrocities against food. ]

guys did you check out this hot new cookbook yet

Also vote Emerald for Guardian of Everglade you guys can ask about those things too.

Comments

[captain_by_the_book]

Who is David?

[unhappy]

My boyfriend, dummy.

:) He is literally the nicest, happiest, most positive person I've ever met. I told Kay about him, I thought he'd tell you.

[captain_by_the_book]

I thought you made him up.

[unhappy]

I could not make up David if I tried, Cassian.

[ help her ]

[captain_by_the_book]

He sounds terrifying. Are you sure he isn't a serial killer?

[unhappy]

He's a camp counselor.

I would be ok with it if he were a serial killer.

[ she would actually probably be into that if she found that out. It would make a lot more sense to her and they could go murder people together, it'd be sweet. ]

[captain_by_the_book]

Nobody is always nice and happy.

[ Except maybe creepy pod people. Are you dating a pod person, Emerald?! ]

[unhappy]

I assume at some point he'll snap and shoot up a restaurant for getting his chocolate milk order wrong.

locked

[captain_by_the_book]

Between you and me: I find the thought comforting.

Re: locked

[unhappy]

There was this kid from his world who tried to break him and couldn't no matter what he tried. We were planning to fake his death during a picnic just to see if we could make David break down.

I liked that kid.

[captain_by_the_book]

That's cruel. A psychologically interesting experiment, but cruel.

[unhappy]

Have you even met me

[captain_by_the_book]

I did say it's an interesting experiment.