Video

[sarcastass]

[Something special must have happened, because look who it is!

It's Szel, finally fully accompanied on screen with Midge, the massive, three foot long cockroach lightning bug mix comfortably seated on his masters shoulders, golden red eyes the size of dinner plates locked unblinkingly on the screen.

Szel, for once, looks cheerful, all pep and energy for perhaps the first time anyone's ever goddamn seen publicly.]

What an interesting few weeks this has been!

Did we ever find Grell? I've been moderately keeping up with that, to an extent. My schedule has been very full lately, but I've done my best to stay on the up and up.

Someone tell me we found her.

I need to know who thought it would be a good plan to kidnap a Guardian. I need to know what stupid looks like, up close and in person.

I'm going to guess that, from the lack of outraged, self righteous screaming on the network, that her husband didn't actually burn anyone alive.

... Yet.

Burn anyone alive yet.

Yet.

Not that I'm making any demands here, not even a suggestion, consider this an open brainstorming session, slash poll.

Raise your hand if you think Marco should set someone on fire.

Comments

[Video]

[fierybluebird]

[RAISES HAND.]

Aye.

Re: [Video]

[sarcastass]

[Raises both hands]

Three votes for immolation.

Re: [Video]

[fierybluebird]

Where's Sparky, that'll get me to five easy!

Re: [Video]

[sarcastass]

[Midge raises one leg, lisping sweetly-]

Six, master.

Oh good, with Sparky, that makes six, we've got a strong lead in favor of death by burning.

I'll get the popcorn pans, I knew I was saving those for a reason.

Re: [Video]

[fierybluebird]

I mean... I was gonna put a bounty on them if they get out of jail.

But if I can figure out a nice entrepreneurial individual willing to burn them in jail...

[HE SAYS ON OPEN NETWORK.]

Re: [Video]

[sarcastass]

[I MEAN NO ONE'S GONNA PAY ATTENTION TO THIS DRAMA POST RIGHT]

I'd offer to help but interestingly enough, fire isn't my forte.

I am wondering how long it'll take for the local justice division to start raining on our parade in here though.

/Not here

[k2so]

[Kay officially gives up on you, Marco. Congrats.]

[Video]

[singinghuntress]

[Okay, this made her laugh and she might even be raising her hand.]

I think he could do much more than just burning them alive.

[Video] / [Filtered for 18+ because he doesn't need to scar children]

[fierybluebird]

Torture. Torture. Torture. Torture.

Re: [Video] / [Filtered for 18+ because he doesn't need to scar children]

[singinghuntress]

Always a favorite pass time~.

Re: [Video]

[sarcastass]

Seven!

Seven votes for a barbecue, I'll put you on the 'in favor of a fiery death' list.

Since this is a brainstorming session and a poll, we'll be taking recommendations to accompany death via burning alive. Would you like to add something?

Re: [Video]

[singinghuntress]

Well, since you asked, I've always found beheading or impalement to be just as horrifying.

[She has experience...on the receiving end.]

Re: [Video]

[fierybluebird]

That's so passe.

Everyone's all about sticking marines in quicksand and throw leeches on them these days.

[SO CASUAL.]

Re: [Video]

[singinghuntress]

Tch. Leeches? Really?

[Leeches are nothing compared to vampires.]

Get some honey and dump it on their heads. Let the bugs eat them alive, it last longer and produces more screams.

Re: [Video]

[fierybluebird]

Why not turn it into a contest, really?

Re: [Video]

[sarcastass]

Beheading would be an idea, but impalement tends to keep them around a little longer.

Just long enough to fully understand how differently things could have gone if they hadn't eaten all those lead paint chips as a child and kidnapped a guardian.

Re: [Video]

[singinghuntress]

I can vouch for impalement hurting like hell if done right.

[She waves it off.]

It's the bleeding out and constant pain that makes them think. But, that's also implying that it was lead chips they ate. They might have simply been lobotomized instead.

Much faster than lead poisoning to make them brainless enough to do something so stupid.

not here

[captain_by_the_book]

[Not quite willing to throw himself into another debate with a vulture stirring the pot Cassian will just be watching, taking note. Maybe some more people will let their respectable masks fall, encouraged by the group dynamics, and thus make all this nonsense useful to him.

He is, after all, about to go Deputy shopping. ]

[Video]

[om_nom_namur]

[Namur rolls his eyes, then raises two hands, both flipping the bird, because why not?]

Re: [Video]

[sarcastass]

[The reply is a theatrically blown kiss]

[Video]

[om_nom_namur]

Met some folk once that had this thing 'bout cuttin' someone stem t' stern- [He demonstrates by sliding his finger from his throat down to his gut] -then grabbin' hold a their throat, lungs, an' heart an' rippin' 'em all out at once. 'Parently thought it'd tell 'em the future or some shit. That kinda stuff makes me kinda crazy though. 'S better t' tie 'em up t' the bottom of a pier early in the mornin', then kick back with a nice bottle a rum an' watch the tide come in. 'S natural. Peaceful. Gives folk a chance t' really think shit over, y' know?

Re: [Video]

[sarcastass]

Oh people will try anything if they think they'll see the future. They downgraded that one to just sheep though, I suppose because human sacrifice is something of a taboo, even when you really need some fortune telling done right.

Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but I always thought keelhauling was the quintessential pirate execution method? Aside from marooning.

[Video]

[om_nom_namur]

Keelhaulin' works too. Kinda depends on what yer goin' for an' where yer at. Most folk'll drown when y' keelhaul 'em, so if yer lookin' t' make 'em hurt for awhile it ain't the best. Leavin' someone 'live, but with a damn terrifyin' story's harder, yanno?

[Video] / 18+ filter

[fierybluebird]

Too fatalistic. I'd rather have birds peck them slowly.

But I like the tide coming in to remind them of their impending doom.

And then rescue them just to give them hope and do even worse.

[Video] / 18+ filter

[om_nom_namur]

That, too. Depends on what they done t' deserve that shit. Most folk ain't worth the effort, honestly. Let the guppies fight, the whales has got shit t' do.