Captain Cassian Andor (
captain_by_the_book) wrote in
genessia2018-03-10 12:40 am
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PSA from the Attleton office - text
[ Oh look Genessia, it's another one of these PSA's from the Attleton Guardian's office, sent over the network and read by Attleton's local radio and TV stations. ]
1. We are aware of the problem of ducks regularly causing traffic jams on Main Street. We are taking it seriously. Nevertheless, I have to ask Attleton's animal lovers to stop calling us with alarmist reports of "There are innocents about to be murdered by death machines right here on Main Street!"
2. Please stop filing charges against the wild Spearows that were stealing food in Attleton during the annual pokemon visit. We issued a bounty on them and the ones who weren't apprehended are long gone. No, we can't bring them back so Judge Judith can put them on trial on court TV.
3. If they wish, Deputies will be given the opportunity to attend classes in Criminal Justice at Attleton University as workload permits.
4. The Attleton Guardian's office is looking to fill a Deputy position.
- Volunteer position: unpaid
- Full-time (with allowances made in scheduling for a second paid job)
- Combat skills necessary, preferably capable fighter even without using magic or supernatural powers
- Experience in law enforcement, military or similar preferred
- Out-of-town candidates welcome but must be willing to move to Attleton
- Must be capable of following orders and working in a team, including work with pokemon
- Not afraid of ducks
1. We are aware of the problem of ducks regularly causing traffic jams on Main Street. We are taking it seriously. Nevertheless, I have to ask Attleton's animal lovers to stop calling us with alarmist reports of "There are innocents about to be murdered by death machines right here on Main Street!"
2. Please stop filing charges against the wild Spearows that were stealing food in Attleton during the annual pokemon visit. We issued a bounty on them and the ones who weren't apprehended are long gone. No, we can't bring them back so Judge Judith can put them on trial on court TV.
3. If they wish, Deputies will be given the opportunity to attend classes in Criminal Justice at Attleton University as workload permits.
4. The Attleton Guardian's office is looking to fill a Deputy position.
- Volunteer position: unpaid
- Full-time (with allowances made in scheduling for a second paid job)
- Combat skills necessary, preferably capable fighter even without using magic or supernatural powers
- Experience in law enforcement, military or similar preferred
- Out-of-town candidates welcome but must be willing to move to Attleton
- Must be capable of following orders and working in a team, including work with pokemon
- Not afraid of ducks
no subject
You mean, you'd pick someone else because they're better suited. I know.
[It doesn't mean he'll like it, or be happy about it, but he knows.]
no subject
Alright. Good. That's all I wanted to have cleared up.
no subject
Yeah, I know how stuff works. Sorta. Sometimes.
no subject
You'll hear from me soon, then... Well, actually, you'll see me for dinner when we continue our daily vegetable debate. But you know what I mean.
no subject
Hey, Cassian? I want to help. Okay?
[Yeah, that sounds dumb so he hangs up but, he figured he should say something.]