PSA from the Attleton office - text

[captain_by_the_book]

[ Oh look Genessia, it's another one of these PSA's from the Attleton Guardian's office, sent over the network and read by Attleton's local radio and TV stations. ]

1. We are aware of the problem of ducks regularly causing traffic jams on Main Street. We are taking it seriously. Nevertheless, I have to ask Attleton's animal lovers to stop calling us with alarmist reports of "There are innocents about to be murdered by death machines right here on Main Street!"

2. Please stop filing charges against the wild Spearows that were stealing food in Attleton during the annual pokemon visit. We issued a bounty on them and the ones who weren't apprehended are long gone. No, we can't bring them back so Judge Judith can put them on trial on court TV.

3. If they wish, Deputies will be given the opportunity to attend classes in Criminal Justice at Attleton University as workload permits.

4. The Attleton Guardian's office is looking to fill a Deputy position.

- Volunteer position: unpaid
- Full-time (with allowances made in scheduling for a second paid job)
- Combat skills necessary, preferably capable fighter even without using magic or supernatural powers
- Experience in law enforcement, military or similar preferred
- Out-of-town candidates welcome but must be willing to move to Attleton
- Must be capable of following orders and working in a team, including work with pokemon
- Not afraid of ducks

Comments

ACTION 1/2

[fierybluebird]

[NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!]

[DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

[Congrats Cassian, Marco books it to Attleton and is now holding up traffic as a giant bluebird and/or hybrid as necessary, to save all the ducks.]

[All of them.]

[B.T.W.: Marco totally values duck > human life.]

[So.]

[That might be something you want to deal with.]

2/2 TEXT

[fierybluebird]

[One the rare occasion he's NOT using his wings to scare people off of hurting the ducks with murder machines...]

[Don't ever ask about the driving classes he failed (almost twice!!!) in academy. And the many many many totaled cars. Well, maybe do ask Grell. It's a hilarious story.]

Can I put a bounty on whoever put the bounty on spearow?

Re: ACTION 1/2

[phoenixcore]

[too bad it wasn't a snake. That he could deal with. ]

Hullo.

So Cassian has this test...

[melodiouspacifist]

[Since Cassian asked him very nicely to go see if he can deal with Marco, with the caveat that he's not allowed to flood Main street, he appears.

Demyx offers a cheerful wave.]

Hi, how are you?

[Because of course birds talk, don't they?]

action - late to the party, but hi

[priceofmagic]

[Having been asked by Cassian to check this situation out, one magical girl makes her way up the road. She has cute pink wings made of magic on her black boots, enabling her to jump over obstacles and stick her landings. Her black, gothic lolita outfit is reinforced with magic, but she is otherwise unarmed.

She stops in front of the giant blue bird, bowing in greeting: It's not like she holds any authority yet.]

Good day, sir. You must be Deputy Marco, of Everglade, correct? I'm Satou Kuroneko~. Can I ask what you're up to?

[phoenixcore]

Ducks? That's a qualification?

video

[captain_by_the_book]

[ He gets a straight-faced curt nod. It's been a strange week. ]

Currently, yes. But I'm mostly interested in people with fighting skills who respect the law and believe in upholding it.

Video

[melodiouspacifist]

You didn't tell me you needed help.

Re: Video

[captain_by_the_book]

Demyx!

[ He does look more than a little dumbfounded, Demyx offering to work more of his own volution? ]

Are you offering?

[Video]

[pipewrenchfights]

Wow! Hours of dangerous work with no pay or benefits?! Sign me up, that sounds awesome.

[Are they serious about the Pokémon? She thought the Skeletor thing was just a joke, but if Pokémon are actually a thing here, she might need to re-evaluate the stupidity of this situation.]

Re: [Video]

[captain_by_the_book]

Yes, exactly that. [ And a steely look to boot, he doesn't have any patience left for sass after this week. ] There are plenty of other, paid jobs. You'll find one.

video:

[immortalrose]

Goodness, I believe I would qualify.

[While he's too good to work as a mere volunteer, Augustine is humored at the idea of causing Andor more grief. Just the thought alone of exasperating that poor Guardian further amuses him. Although, he just likes bothering Cassian at this point.

He considers pestering Cassian to be the same as yanking a cat by the the tail. Just harmless mischief with no malice intended.]

I had duck for dinner last night. Therefore, I'm not afraid of them.

Re: video:

[captain_by_the_book]

[ Lovely. Cassian keeps himself from rolling his eyes, but only barely. ]

Thank you for informing me of that. You're welcome to send us a written application.

[Voice]

[singinghuntress]

With those qualifications, I definitely qualify for the job.

[The question is whether anyone would want her to be in law enforcement.]

The questions is whether or not I'm willing to volunteer and move.

Re: [Voice]

[captain_by_the_book]

[ No. More like, hell no. ]

If you make up your mind you're welcome to send a written application.

text;

[ivegotadream]

People are afraid of ducks? They are like sweet animals who can easily be befriended if you know how.

I would offer to help out, but I don't have experience, I just want to help make sure those who work for you don't get hurt be it by someone being mean or angry ducks who bite because someone stole there food.

private text

[captain_by_the_book]

Yes, some people are afraid of ducks. And others get very angry when they're sitting on the middle of the street and blocking traffic.

[ For all that he's been curt with everyone else so far, even Cassian can't be just as rude with Rapunzel. She's far too likeable to be anything but pleasant to her. He flicks the switch to make the conversation private. ]

I'm actually looking for someone who will do police work full time. It can get dangerous. Last December, one of my Deputies was killed in the line of duty. He literally had his limbs torn off by a criminal.

[ His voice is still kind, but... It would be crueler to get her into something not realizing how dangerous it is. ]

video

[priceofmagic]

You still looking for volunteers?

I'm still trying to sort out where I'm needed most, mind you, but I have law enforcement experience. Without my magic, I can use a gun. Though, magic is certainly preferable. I can keep it on the down-low if I've gotta.

Re: video

[captain_by_the_book]

I'm willing to consider a number of candidates before I make a decision, so, technically, yes. Although there have been several applicants already.

What exactly is your experience in law enforcement? Did you work for the regular police? You mentioned something of hunting down criminals but not in what function.

[Video]

[wardreamer]

...what's a duck?

Re: [Video]

[captain_by_the_book]

A small waterfowl which is an annoyance outside the water.

text;

[stairsbro]

thats it
duck tv show
its happening
were gonna call it duck court
with judge duckie

Re: text;

[captain_by_the_book]

Just don't do it in Attleton, please, I've had my fill of birds.

[Video]

[helghasten]

Mr,

My name is Col. Mael Radec at home.

[Cue various seriousness]

However, my experience is known. I have run a prositegious academy back on my home of Helghan and have experience as the top ranking solider in the Helghast force back home.

Here, I have attended none other than Winter's Royal Guard training classes."

[captain_by_the_book]

[ He nods, a little taken aback. ]

One of Winter's recruits, that's interesting. You're the first one of hers who have applied for an Attleton job. May I ask why you would like to work here, and didn't sign up with the Royal Guard in Fayren?