[Video]

[k2so]

[The sound starts before anything can be seen clearly in the video, the screen partially blocked by the fingers holding the device. There's yelling. Lots of it in fact, and very creative insults.]

Let me go you rust bucket! I’m gonna shove your pistons up your fuel port when I get free! Frigging rusting Imp clanker!

I told you, you smell.

[Kay’s voice is that of a parent who had this argument too many times to count before and has reached the point of giving fucks in negative digits. There's more yelling, some frantic noise and then the sound of water splashing followed by an angry shriek.

The screen shifts until Kay comes to view. He's covered head to toe in different colorful graffiti. Anarchist slogans, symbols, crude caricatures, complaints against the Republic and Empire, and bright stains are scattered all over his black frame.

He's in the bathroom of his shared house with Cassian, who had been turned a kid after eating one of these strange eggs. Next to him, inside the bathtub and still fully clothed, teenage Cassian is still yelling at him and even throwing the occasional shampoo bottle at his head. The droid pays him no mind.]

Does anybody know how to wash off spraypaint from durasteel?

Comments

[captain_by_the_book]

I'm not!

[ And there comes another bottle, well-aimed and with extra strength since he's running out of ammunition.

Oh, Cassian knows he's just being bratty by now, not to mention acting half his age, but... Well, he's upset. And the droid keeps being nice. He must snap and show his true intentions sooner or later! ]

You can't tell me what to do!

[k2so]

[It hits Kay right in the middle of the forehead and then is falls to the floor, bouncing twice before stopping. Kay lets otu and annoyed growl.]

Fine. You asked for it. [He sounds menacing for half a second and then:] BESPIIIIIIIIIIIN! MIRIIIIII!

[Have fun dealing with a pokemon that loves to keep things clean and with another that throws water everywhere, Cassian. They come running into the bathroom after five seconds or so.]

[captain_by_the_book]

[ Now it's happening! The droid is attacking!

...and Cassian is sopping wet and stuck in the tub. Maybe he didn't think this through???

Before he can puff himself up again, the bird with the cotton wings comes swooping into the room, followed by the blue amphibian come running. Suddenly he finds himself with the bird pokemon on his head while the blue one - Miri, that was her name, Miri - leaps into the tub and starts enthusiastically splashing water everywhere, but mostly into Cassian's face. ]

Hey... hmpf! [ Aaand there's a cotton wing scrubbing his face. ]

HMPF!!! [ Cue helpless arm waving. ]

Help me!

[k2so]

Nah. [Comes the amused droid's reply as he watches the pokemon work. Eventually, he does reaches towards Cassian to grab the hem of his shirt and try to pull it off of him.]

You have clean clothes to wear. I can't tell what colors are these ones any more, they need to be washed.

[Kay both the clothes of his size, the least the kid can do is wear them. There's a soft looking pyjama near the bathtub for him to use once he gets out.]

[captain_by_the_book]

[ He's back to cursing up a blue stream, at least half of them R-rated, but ultimately he's resigned to letting the pokemon manhandle him. He doesn't even fight too much when Kay tugs at his shirt, even helps a little to take it off. ]

Fine, I'll change. But you're not throwing my clothes away! I want them back!

[ But the sleep clothes look very nice and soft, he wouldn't mind changing into them now. He crosses his arms over his chest. ]

I'll change, but you have to take the pokemon when you leave. They're going to peek.

[k2so]

[Small miracles. Kay lets out a small, pleased hum when Cassian helps him get the wet shirt off of him]

I said I'll wash them not throw them away. And fine, I trust that you can finish by yourself but try not to break anything.

[Kay grabs Cassian's boots next but he lets the kid to deal with the pants on his own. He can clean those later.]

As you have already heard, Hera is coming over to help while I go out to get cleaned off. I'll get some take out on my way back. You need to be nice to her, she's expecting a baby so don't throw things at her.

[captain_by_the_book]

[ Cassian nods solemnly, or as solemnly as you can be while a Swablu is cleaning you behind your ears. ]

I won't. I'm not going to risk hurting her baby.

[ Not promising to be nice, he can't do that, but he figures he can promise not to risk her getting hurt. After all, he's throwing a childish tantrum out of sheer spite, he isn't actually that childish. ]

...even if I think it's dumb and I don't need a babysitter.

[k2so]

Good, thank you. She's still not showing but it's there. We need to take care of her.

[Good enough for Kay, he knows he can't ask much of Cassian in this state. He gives Miri and Bespin a soft whistle and they pay attention to him.] Let's let him finish on his own, girls. I have some berries for you two.

[captain_by_the_book]

[ Despite all his grumbling, Cassian feels some regret when the pokemon leave him alone.

He's going to actually be good and finish cleaning up (and then stay a little longer in the bathroom both to hide, and to poke around.)

By the time he leaves his bathroom refuge, he will be dressed in the soft flannel pajamas and at least not have the looks of a wild child anymore. (He will have acquired some razor blades, as well hidden as he can - never turn down free weapons.) ]

[k2so]

[Despise what he had said to Cassian, Kay is very tempted to throw the ugly clothes away. But a promise is a promise and he puts the shirt and jacket into the washing machine before going to feed the pokemon. Miri had already cleaned Cassian's boots so that's one less thing to worry about.

The door rings just as he's finished handing out berries -to everyone, so the other Pokemon didn't complain- and he welcomes in Hera. Kay doesn't want to stress her over so he promises to be back home as soon as he can. Going back to Nova is the last thing he wants to do but they have the cleaning supplies he needs. Once there, he finds a droid shop that helps him scrub the paint off os him in less than an hour.

He picks up take-out food on his way back home, noodles, pizza, ice-cream...they're not the healthiest of foods but he doesn't want to have to fight more with Cassian today. He's relieved to find the house still in one place and thanks Hera for the help before leaving the food in the kitchen. There's hope that the good smell alone might attract unruly children.]

[captain_by_the_book]

[ Once it's just the two of them and the herd of pets again, the delicious smells do indeed lure Cassian into the kitchen eventually.

There's Bahryn on his shoulder, a faithful companion now as she was to his older self, apparently, and he's cradling Fest in his arms. Unlike his older self, this Cassian happens to adore the cat, absolutely convinced that she is cute, and blithely ignorant to her viciousness. ]

You did bring pizza. I didn't think you would.

[k2so]

[Kay already has a mini legion of pets asking for his attention...and berries. Mostly the berries. He also got fresh lettuce for their turtle and when Cassian shows up, Kay has it in his hands. He almost drops it when he sees how relaxed Fest looks in the kids arms.]

Now, that's a miracle...Uh. Yes of course I brought food. I promise I would, no? Just don't eat it all in one go, you might get sick.

[captain_by_the_book]

I'm not a little kid, you don't have to tell me that. I'll take a little of everything and put the rest in the fridge.

[ He shifts Fest to one arm so he can poke around the takeout bags, finally placing the ice cream and noodles on top of the pizza box so he can carry them all to the living room - quite the balancing act since he's still got the pachirisu and cat clinging to him. ]

I was good for Hera, you know. I behaved myself.

[k2so]

No you are not little...just short. [Kay reaches out and ruffles Cassian's hair before he runs away with the backs. Gotta take advantage of the fact Cassian can't throw anything at him if all his hands are occupied.]

Glad to hear. Then you can have ice cream as dessert. Have you met the Vanillite yet? Hoth can make it snow.

[captain_by_the_book]

Snow? Really?!

[ His eyes are wide in wonder. He curls up on the couch, Fest on his lap and Bahryn cuddled against his chest, and reaches for a slice of pizza. Totally not sneakily feeding the pokemon little pieces of toppings. ]

Think we could have the garden covered in snow? That would be neat. It's too warm here, you don't even need a proper jacket.

[k2so]

[Fest's ears go up and she paws at Cassian's arm. Yoooo, kid, be nice and share the pizza. She likes it too.]

Yes, really. And the garden sounds fine, just be careful not to annoy the fairies. By warm you mean, the temperature is above zero.

[captain_by_the_book]

[ He plucks a piece of tuna from his pizza slice and feeds it to Fest, giggling when she licks his fingers. And then he goes right back to using these cat-licked fingers to hold his slice of pizza. ]

What are fairies? Are these more pets of yours? You really have way too many, you know, you have a serious problem.

[k2so]

[That's the most unsanitary thing he's seen Cassian do in a long time and it would show on Kay's face if he were capable of facial expressions. Fest, meanwhile, looks content and pleased, purring and rubbing her head under Cassian's chin. ]

No....well, ye we have a lot of pets but to be honest, most of them are yours. Fairies aren't pokemon, they're magic creatures, like spirits. We helped them int he past and now they fix our garden and leave us fish in the front door.

[That sounded better in his head.]

[captain_by_the_book]

I'm not judging but I'm judging because you guys are weird.

[ Says the kid who once again feeds another piece of tuna to the cat - who relishes in licking sauce from his fingers - and then plucks an olive from the pizza with these fingers. ]

Tell me more about old me?

[k2so]

Jokes on you kid, you grow up to join the weird folks in this house.

[Ugh...as long as no one gets sick from that, Kay supposes is acceptable. Bt he's not kissing Cassian once he's back to normal until he takes a bath and brushes his teeth.]

You cook terribly, it's a tragedy, but you do try. You look very good in suits even if you never wear them, you're very fond of your leather jackets and your parkas. You also have great aim with a blaster rifle is very se---very impressive.

[captain_by_the_book]

[ How dare you, Kay, his own lover betraying him so ruthlessly...

The boy Cassian, clueless as he is, just bops his head and hums in acknowledgment. ]

That's too bad about the cooking, guess we're stuck eating pizza all the time, huh? [ Not that he thinks that is a bad thing, necessarily. ] And chilaquiles. If they make chilaquiles here, I tried to buy them in Nova City and nobody knew what it is. [ He's still pouting a little bit about that, really. How rude! ]

But I'm really good with a blaster now already! I'm the best marksman in my cell!

[k2so]

[He's only joking mostly, you know that! Deep down you do.]

Yes. Also sushi and noodles. Maybe here in Attleton someone will know how to make those. If not, you can give me a list of the ingredients and I'll get them. Then we can try to cook them.

[Hopefully without burning anything down.]

[captain_by_the_book]

Hmm, okay, we could try that.

[ Even if he's a little disappointed that Kay didn't ask for a blaster demonstration instead. He's really good with one, for real! ]

Or we could cook something for your pokemon. Do they have a favorite food?

[k2so]

[Yeahhhhh....Kay doesn't need to see you shoot at things inside the house. Sorry mini Cass.]

Most love berried but in reality they would eat almost anything. I saw the Duosion eat a pillow once. He coughed it up 2 hours later.

[captain_by_the_book]

Uh... let's not feed them pillows. Even I know that's a bad idea.

[ He gives the pokemon on the couch a thoughtful look. ]

Maybe we should just stick to the berries.