genessia | [video]

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[A scruffy faced older man looks flatly at the device, clearly annoyed.]

I swear to God if I just got kidnapped to some cryptid hell, I will burn the whole damn place down. It was a few drinks. A few. I best be laying face down in a ditch somewhere drowning on my own vomit.

That seems better than this.

This, whatever this is.

I’ve never seen technology like this. It’s like something out of a bad movie.

A bad B movie, as a matter of fact. [He frowns at the video, head tilting, then snorts.]

Someone point me to the nearest bar, otherwise to the nearest bus home, because Christ, this is not how I intended to spend my weekend.

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[Wow. Okay, he looks..... really familiar to her, but it's not Gabe.]

Hm, it seems to be pretty common for people who first get here to seek out a bar these days. I'd love to help you there, but I'm not much of a drinkers, so I'll let the others cover that one.

You'll be spending longer than a weekend here though.

[He looks grouchier than this other dude you speak of. Because he is grouchy as hell right now.]

Yeah, great. When you get kidnapped by unknown kidnappers or creatures of massive size that you can't see, you seek out the bar. Seems logical to me.

What's this about spending longer than a weekend though? I got shit to do back home.

I suppose. Sounds like you'd get along with one of my friends.

[She has a feeling he'll run into McCree quite a bit.]

Well, it's going to have to wait because there's no way of knowing when you can leave and how. If it counts for anything though, time stops back home while you're here, supposedly.

[She possibly has another war to deal with, man.]

[He looks at her so flatly. So unamused. Look here pretty Angel woman, you're not making the situation any better. No whiskey. No way home. Wtf.]

So what that girl in the information video said was true, huh? It's not some nifty movie set or anything like that?

[Pretty Angel woman never said anything about there being no whiskey around, just that she wasn't familiar with the bars around here.]

Unfortunately. Weiss -- the girl -- has been here for a long time. I've only been here for nearly a year maybe, but that's long enough as is.

[Not that she's rushing to get out. She has no way to leave right now and quite frankly, she could be saving lives here while she waits, so it's whatever. Give her a way out and she'll take it though.]

A year? Jesus, that's a while.

[What the hell is he suppose to do for that long? At least back home he has his funds in order.]

I'm too old for this shit. [Said more to himself, really.]

It's a weird thing to think about, for sure. Some people leave sooner than me and some have been here for longer than me. It's hard to say when people come and leave with certainty as far as a pattern goes.

E-Eh? That all sounds terrible, though..! And unhealthy, and unsafe..!

Being kidnapped tends to be unsafe. Especially if it's by a cryptid.

So don't make it worse by purposefully drowning in vomit..!

Calm down, kid. Swear, I'm not going to try and do it on purpose.

The option to vomit and drown is still open.

[There are plenty of bars and the money he'd been given upon waking was more than enough to achieve his desire goals.]

Home isn't an option but I can tell you where the bars are.

Good. Because it's still looking ideal.

[Oh, he's def finding himself a bar, and a hassle for more money if possible.]

If Home isn't in the plans, the cheapest bar is the next best place.

I'll shoot you a few options if you'd like.

I'm sure you can mooch a drink or two off of people too.

[She's in the habit of buying new people drinks and she assumes that others are as well.]

Oh I'm sure Christ is, per omnipresence, looking out for you even now. As for Bar's, you'll want Jack's, on Laurel and 20th. Very close by; you'll find the streets are ordered both alphabetically and numerically. It couldn't be more convenient.

I can also ping the location directly on your phone, if you'd rather.

[It's a karaoke bar don't listen.]

Right now I've got my doubts on the big guy looking in on me. You however, are. Jack's huh? Guess I'll have to check it out.

[AND THEN WALK OUT, THANKS]

"Mysterious ways", if you like the cliche. Well, let me know should you need aught else.

[What! It's fun!]

I got a feeling you'd get along well with a guy I know...

[Man, you are reading WAY too Church-y to him.]

Haha. "A guy", "feelings". Goodness, I hope Genessia hasn't knocked all definite articles out of you. Ah, speaking of which, may I have a name? Mine's Ted, if you prefer going second.

[It's a common impression. He wonders why.]

Unfortunately, the best a bus will do ya 'round here is just take you to other B movie cities. Nova and Everglade are competing for the "Best B Movie City" title.

[Which probably has a hand in why he thinks they're two of the more interesting cities. But also because Attleton sucks.]

For booze, swing by Hangar Queen, up on Fir and 22nd. First drink is always free for new patrons.

Nova and Everglade. Stay clear of those places. Great. I don't mind a B movie but I'd rather not deal with being in one myself.

Now, Hanger Queen and free drink? That's more my calling. Thanks.

Nova's not so bad once you get used to the weird shit like aliens. [Because the cyborg thinks that aliens are the weird ones.] But yeah, skip Everglade if ya don't want to get roped into what's essentially a human versus monster turf war.

Always happy to help. Any free drinks beyond the first one depends on smooth talking ability with the owner.

For now, I think I'll take a pass on all that. Though... monsters? What kind of monsters are we talkin' 'bout here?

[Mild interest. Shh, asking for a friend. Yeah.]

I'll keep that in mind.

We're talkin' the usual suspects like ghosts, werewolves, vampires, demons, pretty much everything on those lines. Lot of 'em are pretty nice so long as you don't try to shank 'em with wood stakes or whatever. Just watch out for the one vampire who keeps threatenin' to make it rain blood, he likes putting a show of his hissy fits on the network for everyone.

[Normally he wouldn't have bothered to make fun of Dracula, but he's still mad about the time one of Dracula's demon babies broke his church-club's window.]

Can't blame ya for passin' on it though. Only reason I'm used to it is because I've had two and a half years of this shit.

What exactly do you consider a cryptid?

[POSSIBLY: THIS GUY. Robert meet Robert.]

Hangar Queen is on Fir and 22nd Street. If you're still near the Bay, Jack's Bar is on Laurel and 20th, but I've heard they have karaoke. [That does not seem this dude's speed.]

[Oh, Hi Robert.]

Animals or creatures that are commonly not believed to exist but actually do. Bigfoot and shit. Not Mothman. that's a fucking joke.

Someone mentioned both those. I just found out Jack's bar is crap though. I don't have time for that Karaoke stuff right now. [Mary isn't here anyhow...]

Wow. I get being mad but really, you'd rather die than be here? This place isn't that bad.

Though feel free to try burning it down anyway if you're that upset.

[She wants to see what happens.]

[Wow, you're very pink and shit.... He just stares a moment.]

Ever heard of hyperbole, kid?

[Pink and shit are two very good words to describe Junko, yes.]

Obviously, but it'd be pretty mean of me to assume you were joking if you're actually expressing a genuine wish to die, right?

[She says, like she would never do that. After all, she'd at least want to know what way he's actually leaning before she dug in.]

It's always interesting to see what this world brings.

[Fai smiled slightly before giving a small wave.]

Also you must drink alot. Am I right?

And what does this world bring? Because so far, I'm not impressed.

[....he gave a flat wave back though. Daww. And yes, he's actually very impressed.]

That could be taken as a understatement. Got a problem with it?

Every so often something happens that either change the city itself, or us as people. I've had many years of experience with that lot. Both the good and bad.

[He shook his head slightly.]

Not at all. I'm one who can drink all night myself and I knew someone he would like a good drink as much as the next person. Never can have too many drinking buddies after all, right?

[ Cassian has only the vaguest pop culture osmosis idea what a B movie is but he can certainly sympathize with the annoyance. ]

Sorry. Your weekend plans have been ruined. Welcome to Genessia.

Drinking won't make it better but if you'd like to do it anyway I recommend Velvet Lust. They have good steaks, too.

Gee, thank's for the welcome. I kind of thing getting kidnapped to anywhere but home is a bit of a weekend ruining thing. Week ruiner too, really.

[a pause though, then a hum.] Steak would be good too. Velvet Lust, huh? Sounds like a gay bar. [Which is... fine actually]

It is. [ He doesn't even bat an eyelash at that. ]

It's a good place for new arrivals; Tannusen, the owner, has been in Genessia for years. He knows a lot about magic and... other assorted weirdness you'll have to deal with here.

Yeeeeeah, sorry to be the bearer of bad news here, but it ain't the drinks, it's kidnapping. Maybe not cryptid hell kidnapping, but close.

Luckily there's plenty of bars, so, you know, there's that. I can plug mine if you're okay with my wildly shameless entrepreneurial spirit.

Kidnapping is kidnapping. It's generally a mess. At least it's not cryptid hell, I guess.

Wildly shameless entrepreneurial spirit is worth a shot. Plug away, though I tell ya now. Offer a free shot of whiskey and you're already in a step to the right direction.

Eh, I'm not an expert, but this is probably the least messy mass kidnapping I've ever heard. Seems downright tidy, oddly enough.

Sure, I'm pretty sure I can swing that. I'm at the bar of Fortuna Palace, a casino in Nova City.

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