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Excuse me.

I got a question.

[There... is a very oddly dressed man on screen. A full body spandex suit with a mask, which on anyone else would look stupid-

It still looks stupid.

But it looks stupid while showcasing the fact that this man is built like a brick shit house and is further more, armed to the teeth. Two katanas sheathed at his back, two guns in the holster, a bandolier filled with ammo, it appears there's a few daggers sheathed around his boots-]

Can I get this necklace in maybe like a vermilion or like maybe a dark sort of galaxy cut ruby?

I got fucking taste here, don't insult me with this garbage.

[And a text later]

Also where the fuck am I and who do I have to shank for a sandwich around here?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

You're talking like you're not an earth thing.

Yeah it's an earth thing. It was about ten years worth of earth things.

Sure. Sure lets go with that. Teammates. Amigos. Ultrabuddys.

No. A Remnant thing. But there are a lot of others from Earth, or some variation here.

Was it some kind of great war?

Sorry, you can't just form a team out of nowhere. You have to make a team name, a team attack, and appoint someone as leader.

Well that sounds just like earth.

... I actually would not be lying if I said kind of.

So I'm gonna say I'm the leader, the team attack is I win and the team name is Team Deadpool.

It does? I thought Earth was a normal planet without many fantasy or sci-fi elements.

A not so great war?

What no you can't just decide everything about your team just like that. It has to have a meaning behind it and make sense. You don't seem like the leader type. The team attack name is just something snarky you made up and doesn't have anything to do with our strengths as a team which I can't figure out because you're a jerk who won't fight me. And the name has to be both our names combined and sound like a color. DJJ is taken so...JD? [He pronounces it as "Jade".]

Oh there's an infinite amount of alternate realities of earth where it's totally fantasy or scifi or not or both or earth doesn't exist anymore or never existed so on so forth.

It was a fashion war, I can tell you that. Blue eyelashes. Don't look back.

I'm leader because I'm an old crusty fuck and I say so. Also Jade is a girls name, if we gotta be a girls name why can't we be Becky?

Doesn't that get confusing? Are you a time traveler?

...Blue eyelashes sound cool.

Because Becky isn't a color and Jade is a name based on a color and our names combined.

No. Just very aware.

I'm sorry you're wrong.

I want to be the Becky team though.

Aware of what?

Says the guy who probably doesn't know what waterproof mascara is.

Then find someone else who can combine their name to be Becky.

The fact we're just pawns in a massive fake universe.

[Wade. Wade please]

Excuse you, I can't swim without my non-run mascara on.

Why does it have to be a portmanteau though? Why can't it just be a random name for funsies?

Would we be able to tell if we were?

I don't think you can swim. At all.

Because that's against the rules! Go make your own team if you want team Becky so bad.

I mean I can tell.

Okay for your information it's really hard to swim in an undertow, I'm not fucking Aquaman.

I'm gonna find Becky and tell her you don't like her.

Are you being sarcastic? It's important for me to know because it changes what I might tell you.

It's not even a lot of water. Aquaman a friend of yours?

I can't stand Becky she used markers on my hair once.

So I look sarcastic?

[YOU HAVE YOUR MASK BACK ON YOUR FACE IS COVERED, YOU CHODE]

It goes above my waist, anyone can drown in that! No, Aquaman isn't a real person, he's fake like Sasquatch and North Dakota.

You're gonna make her cry, all she wanted was to give you a decent hairstyle.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

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