1st Mistake | Video & Text

[majorfuckup]

[The angle looks like it's being adjusted several times. Not-so-quietly-mumbled groaning sounds can be heard before it focuses on a very displeased looking man in his later twenties.]

Ugh what kind of crap cellphone is this?! It doesn't even get reception or take good selfies! I can't even with any of this--!

[Apparently, he's so upset he ends it there. A few minutes later, maybe ten, he turns on the video again. He isn't whining yet, but he still looks distressed. Understandable, right?]

Look, I didn't mean to get all bitchy, it's just, this has been a really hard day for me, I woke up in a gross pod and I can't even wash away all the Do Not Want I had with that. And I-- I'm like trying to keep it together, but... [Here come the watering eyes. He bites his lip, oh god is he embarrassed.] I ruined my best pair of pants, and they're not even good pants, and then I saw that hologram and she had perfect shoes and perfect hair and I'm here with this fake monopoly money and ugly ass necklace. Where did you even get this thing from? [He holds up his pendant, utterly disgusted.] The dollar store? I don't even know why I'm trying! I'm probably just being watched by some creepy stalker or psycho-killer. Ew much? But if somehow anyone I know does see this...

Just don't get all rude and self-righteous and I-told-you-so-with me! It's like, really obnoxious and I don't need to listen to it! [He rolls his eyes dramatically, ending the video for now. A few minutes later:]

Chalking that up to a temporary loss of judgment from waking up from a waterlogged coffin. #Wakingupinanotherworld #Notokwiththis #Yourphonessuck #Missingmyfriends :(

Comments

video;

[livable]

Major?

[ There are certain times she has more sympathy for Clive and Ravi and Peyton than others. This is one of those times. ]

It sounds like you're in need of a spa and champagne day.

[ She knows what he really needs but honestly, she's got her own brain problems and they're saying spa and champagne and get yo nails did. ]

video;

[majorfuckup]

Liv!

[Oh. He really doesn't like how happy he sounded to see her. How was he going to live that one down? Super humiliating. But he is happy to see her, and this teenage brain is amplifying all the concern and every possible emotion x1000. He's partially convinced this is all some weird zombie vision and hallucination.]

That's like, the best idea you've had today.

video;

[livable]

Stay right where you are, I'm going to pick you up and we're going for it. Just give me like ten minutes to fake sick to my coworkers and I'll be there, and you can tell me all about it over cocktails.

[ She doesn't remember teenage girl brain so she's already sure that he remembers more than she does. ]

Text

[clevermind]

[Belle isn't particularly used to the odd devices but she's caught on fairly well given her short stay in the city. Someone really ought to wash his mouth out with soap though she can understand the stress of the situation.]

Are you feeling a bit better? There is little that I can assist with but be comforted in knowing that you are not alone.

Text

[majorfuckup]

[Oh thank god she can text.]

Yeah no that just makes it soooo much worse because now I'm just convinced it's a literal nightmare!

I can't even use MY phone! :( Which is like so much better smh.

Text

[clevermind]

I like to remind myself that it could always get worse.

What is stopping you from using your phone? I'm sure there is a way if you look for it.

(video)

[tevinteraltus]

(The rather dashing man on the video frowns, and there's more than a hint of sympathy on his face and glittering in his olive eyes.)

By all means, bitch. I nearly ruined my boots in that "Bay". Antivan leather isn't exactly growing on trees 'round here now is it?

(He chuckles.)

I don't know about "perfect", but Weiss does know how to accessorize, which I can appreciate.

(He places a hand over his heart and bows slightly at the shoulders in greeting.) Dorian of House Pavus. Pleased to meet you.

(video)

[majorfuckup]

But everyone's watching and it's just really embarrassing. But I think it's like, really understandable in this situation, you know? You are so supportive and I have no idea what that leather is. I must sound so stupid right now!

[He shrugs his shoulders, just so relieved someone actually understands.]

Do you know if her hair is like naturally that color? Oh--

Oh my god! [Claps his hands together.] You must be some sort of aristocrat with a name like that! I'm Major Lilywhite. Did I say that already?

(video)

[tevinteraltus]

It is, indeed, rather embarrassing. (He's certainly not going to argue with it.)

...no. Antiva is very far from here.

(What a strange question?)

I'm fairly certain her hair is naturally that color, yes... (And then he laughs.) Yes something like that, but no, you did not. It's a pleasure, Major.

[Video]

[k2so]

What's a selfie?

And yes, the bay is terrible. So full of sand...got in all my joints when I arrived here too.

[Video]

[majorfuckup]

Are you an actual robot? [The shock of seeing a droid that looks like something from a science fiction film is enough to distract him from the Worst Week Ever.]

Stop by the bay and I'll show you what a selfie is. As long as you're not like, one of those creepy and evil ones.

[k2so]

I'm a KX Series droid, the name's K-2SO. What's your name?

[So yeah, a robot with advanced intelligence.]

I have no interest in hurting you or anybody else, no. And I don't have anything urgent to do now so I suppose I can go there.

[Video]

[armofgod]

Good priorities, but the real question is has anyone answered you?

[Video]

[majorfuckup]

Only if you call acting like ass and having horrible comedic timing an answer. [Is he judging some people? He's definitely judging some people.]

[Video]

[armofgod]

Well, I pride myself on at least one of those, so congrats to me. Think you're gonna make it here?

text;

[stairsbro]

lmao
do not call that a temporary loss of judgement
your video was comedy fucking gold dude
#yourhairseemedprettyperfecttoo
#justsaying
#nohomo



#maybealittlehomo

text;

[majorfuckup]

OMG STOP MAKING FUN OF ME!!!

It's not funny we're probably trapped here! I don't exist for your entertainment ok and I just think it's really insensitive of you to say that while my whole world is falling apart.

#butnicehashtags
#atleastnoteveryoneherelivesunderarock

[captain_by_the_book]

[ ...

That is some introduction video. ]

If a kidnapping leaves you in such a state as to get upset that other people have nicer shoes than you, you are doing alright.

[ Cassian Andor, not so quietly judging you. Shoes. Pfft. Now if that had been jacket envy he would approve. ]

[majorfuckup]

Can you not???

I'm trying really really hard rn to keep it together okay? SORRY if pointing out someone's flawless taste in footwear is too much for you to handle.

Ok I'm like sorry if that was bitchy of me. This is just so much to take in and shoes are probably the most normal thing about it.

[Video]

[myfayevalentine]

*What the heck even is this guy? Why is he so whiny? Urgh, he's annoying, but she could have some fun with this. So she smiles at him, amused*

You know what you should do? With the scraps of money you've been given? You should gamble it.

[Video]

[majorfuckup]

Uh, no. Gambling is for people who look like ass and smell like cheap cigarettes to pretend they have a life.

[Sorry Faye, Major is on preppy bubblegum and Demi Lovato brain, not party girl brain.]

text

[reachnotflexibility]

Garrus has no idea what just happened, from the strange behavior to the pound signs (what was up with that even?), and he's probably going to regret this, but damn if he isn't amused by this newcomer.

Are you really more concerned about Schnee's shoes than being kidnapped?

[ ...And for good measure to make sure he speaks in a way this guy understands ]

#getyourprioritiesstraight

[ Did he do that right? ]

text

[majorfuckup]

Like who says I can't be concerned about both? Seeing good shoes when mine are soaked forever is enough to make me want to vomit.

#Notmyfaultyouhavezerotasteinshoes #Judgmentalmuch? #Stopbeingsosalty

Text | I am so sorry

[vulcanyounot]

I am unfamiliar with the usage of the octothorpe in that way and therefore unable to understand your message fully.

Text | Don't be

[majorfuckup]

I'm not sure if you're saying that because you're probably from somewhere else or deliberately trying to be a jerk but FYI no one knows what an octothorpe is.