text;

[unhappy]

just found this while looking at some online recipe books



is this really the man you all want to vote for as best cook???

Comments

[unhappy]

Idk what corellian buckwheat is but if it doesn't kill me I'll try it.

I'll tell Johnny and I'll be there at 8!

[ Her boss puts up with way too much from her. It's a miracle she hasn't been fired again. She's probably just going to leave him a post-it that says "Not coming in tonight bye" ]

[captain_by_the_book]

Don't be late, or the food might be gone.

[ He doesn't expect her to be there before 9, but it's worth a try to see if food can be used to lure her. ]

Everything I make is good. Don't believe Kay. Or certain slander on the network.

[unhappy]

Kay actually defended you and challenged me to a cooking competition so I told him to find judges. Those judges are going to suffer like you would not believe XP

[captain_by_the_book]

WHAT?!

We are not having a cooking competition! No judges. No nothing.

What are you planning?

[unhappy]

It was his idea! All I did was agree to it.

Garbage fire.

[ She knows he's going to take that as a joke. No one would ever take that seriously. It'll be great. ]

[captain_by_the_book]

Hilarious.

Whatever you do, don't torment the judges. And I'm not participating. That ridiculous award show is enough cooking competition for me.

[unhappy]

You have to compete or else I'm just cooking garbage for idiots who want to waste their time on something like that.

[captain_by_the_book]

I'm sure your food can't be that bad, but I'm not competing. Maybe they're wasting time in the hope for good food.

[unhappy]

It probably wouldn't be if I wanted to compete. I mostly just want to make people eat food out of a trash can because your robot decided to challenge me over an edit job I did on Genessia Paint and the worst freeze frame I could find from one of our conversations.

1/2

[captain_by_the_book]

He's not my robot.

2/2

[captain_by_the_book]

That is no excuse to give people terrible food. There is no excuse for that. Unless they are imperials. Or Ewoks. They would rather eat you anyway.

It is a terrible edit.

[Still not taking the garbage food literally. ]

[unhappy]

don't know what either of those are but I told him not to pick anyone either of us like much to avoid bias.

I have second hand embarrassment for how many people took it seriously

[captain_by_the_book]

Good on you, but I'm still not playing.

Did they? That is embarrassing. Maybe they're just playing along.

[unhappy]

OK then I will tell Kay that since you don't want to participate he can invite your friends and I'll feed them garbage fire food.

Some of them I could tell were, some of them I think are just idiots. You'd be surprised how many idiots there are in the world.

[captain_by_the_book]

I'm never surprised by the amount of idiots in the world.

You're being one if you think I'll let you poison my allies. [ Allies! He has no friends! He needs no friends. Sheesh, Em, tough spy is too tough for friends. ] I need them.

[unhappy]

You're being one for needing anyone.

[ They're cool now, she can say that. ]

[captain_by_the_book]

[ It's cool. Insults is how they show their love. ]

Allies. Everyone needs them in a firefight. Not many I trust. That'd be stupid.

[unhappy]

Am I your ally?? :) :) :)

[captain_by_the_book]

You could be.

Are you?

[ Yes. The answer is yes. ]

[unhappy]

I think I'm more of a project for you. You'll have to prove otherwise if you want me to think I'm more.

ahahah I love her so much

[captain_by_the_book]

You're both a project and an ally. These aren't mutually exclusive.

You'll have to prove yourself to me, too.

She's going to make his life hell

[unhappy]

Yeah I'm not doing that. You don't even have something I'm supposed to be allying with you against. You just want a word so you don't have to admit you like me for some reason.

[captain_by_the_book]

I can like people and kill them anyway. These two are unrelated.

[ Yay blunt honesty! ]

Just because we're not at war right now doesn't mean it's not important to know who you can rely on.

[unhappy]

Cassian
Calm down
No one's talking about killing anyone
Deep breaths
I can not murder people who aren't my allies too
You need help

[captain_by_the_book]

Sorry.

[ Did he come on too strongly?

OOPS. ]