genessia | Out of body experiences aren't all they're cracked up to be [Open Log] (backdated cuz I'm a loser)

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Out of body experiences aren't all they're cracked up to be [Open Log] (backdated cuz I'm a loser)

Who: Namur (in Ted's body) and ANYONE
What: Just what it says on the tin
When: August 4
Where: Noted in prompts
Why?: <-
Warnings: Potty mouth

Schlepping around Genessia in Ted's body isn't exactly the way Namur planned to spend his Friday morning, and what a shitty situation that is. Can't taste anything with his face so he keeps bumping into people. He can see a lot better so he keeps gawking at leaves on distant trees and bumping into people. Seriously, it's rude. They want to fight or something? Oh right, it's him bumping into them. So he smiles sheepishly and waves, trying his best to dart through the crowd which seems far less inclined to part ahead of him than usual. What a pain in the ass...

[Prompt 1]

It isn't Namur's first rodeo, though. First time borrowing someone else's body, true, but at least he isn't completely freaking out about all things human. Yes, he can feel the tiny, gross little hairs growing in his face but he knows that that's normal- and it's not like Ted would wind up with a five o' clock shadow anyway, so that's kind of nice. He feels ever more presently the sensation of cloth, as Ted's attire tends to be... well. Flowy. It tingles at all the sensitive little nerves and is enough to just about drive Namur nuts. So first stop? A wardrobe change. Good guts, it's about time someone got this smolt some clothes that don't make people want to weep in pain. Namur can be found enjoying the novelty of shopping from the racks instead of having to get something custom made, or just as he steps out of the shop, tugging a bit at the cuffs of the sleeves in a new t-shirt, looking rather pleased with himself.

[Prompt 2]

With the annoying aspect of having more sensitive skin taken care of, Namur thinks it might be nice to actually enjoy it for a change, and makes his way down to the docks in Fayren. Sure, there were probably places nearer he could have gone, but he wouldn't know where to look, and what he's looking for can almost always be found chasing rats dockside.

Yes, he's looking for cats.

Because they're soft and fluffy to touch and he knows what they like to eat. It's a hard thing to sit still, but he makes himself do it, a small filched fish propped up on one knee as he sits cross legged on a thick post. It's also a chance to see how much haki Ted's body is strong enough to do, so Namur sits with eyes closed, observing the life around him through other, more familiar means. There's a cat creeping closer, drawn by the promise of food but wary to be around a human. It'd be a shame if someone scared it away, wouldn't it?

[Prompt 3]

Another rare treat of the well shit now I'm human variety: all those foods humans love to eat actually do taste good. For once. Probably because he can't smell how dead and devoid of life everything is after its been chopped and boiled or burned and what have you. And Namur isn't about to let this opportunity go to waste. He can be found in a variety of establishments, devouring and appreciating food like he's never eaten it before. Maria always liked hot wings, so he's sure to find some of those; Ace and his brothers loved barbecue; Fionna had made cake pops that one time and been rather unhappy that he hadn't appreciated them, so he makes sure to find some now, even if it's a little too late to make it up to her; Airy had been all about the cookies and cupcakes, so those are for sure on the list; hot dogs too, since everyone seemed to go wild for them at the cafeteria; and hell, he'll even try a pie for Pinkie and a radish for Espio. All these rich, spicy and sweet foods he tries, and more. All of them. But he can't eat it all on his own, and food is much better with friends. Sure would be nice if someone decided to join him.

[Prompt 4]

It wouldn't be a proper night out on the town if Namur didn't hit the dance floor at least once. It's been awhile, honestly, since he's gone, and even though it's Ted's body, it seems to respond well enough, which surprises him a little. Others might be a little surprised to see "Ted" busting these moves as well. Or even being caught less than dead in a club. Maybe someone ought to punch him for being a hypocrite. Wouldn't that be fun?

[Prompt 5]

Wildcard- if there's something else you'd like to do to mess with Namur-in-Ted's-body, let's do it.

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There is one woman who doesn't appear to be lining up to punch him. She's been watching the entire display while she sips her drink at the bar, quietly appraising. She doesn't know what kind of dancing this is supposed to be, but it is smooth, and she knows that a man with rhythm on the dancefloor has plenty of rhythm in other places too. She straightens her back and adjusts her cleavage, waiting for him to notice her. Maybe he'll chance his style and allow her to join him on the dancefloor.

[She'll have to try harder than that to get his attention, unfortunately. He can't smell her in the room, and he promised Ted there would be no fornication, so he's not really looking around. He seems to have no problem adapting his style when another lady tries to dance with him, however, so it seems like a direct approach might be best.]

*Well, that's how it is, is it? Okay. Maybe she can give these women a run for their money. At least, that was the plan. Adjusting the skirt so that the slit wasn't showing too much thigh, for now, Faye stalks across the dancefloor towards him, hips swaying in time to the music*

[At the very least she could say hello. But Namur will beat her to the punch, because even though his sense of smell and taste are dimmed, his eyesight is improved and he happens to glance up in her direction during a pause between beats. He laughs to himself and spins, beginning to dance toward her. Does she even know Ted? If she does, it's going to be hilarious when "Ted" slides up close, grabs her around her waist, and pulls them both into a pseudo-Bachata that'd melt bricks, voice soft against her ear.]

Hello, Faye.

*No, Faye doesn't know Ted, so having her waist grabbed like that is more pleasant than confusing or amusing. She smirks as her own arms wrap around him while they dance, but she then she suddenly freezes, eyes narrowed*

How do you know my name?

*Could be a punter from the casino or something for all she knows, but still she is suspicious*

Seen y' postin' on the network...

[Ohhh shit there's a hell of a temptation. Show her a nice time, then laugh at the confusion when she meets Ted the first time. It'd be fun for the evening... probably kind of fun later...

Nah, he can't do that to Faye, though; leave her expecting a warm friend and getting Ted instead.

He laughs ruefully, gazing into Faye's suspicious eyes as he runs sensitive fingertips over her cheek, kind of wishing he was more of a bastard than he is.]

An' more'n that, actually. 'S me, Namur. Jus'... some weird shit happened an' now I'm takin' someone else's body for a cruise. Hopefully jus' 'til the end a the day, but sometimes these things can last a week or more. He's got mine, so if y' seen me 'round bein' a differnt kinda asshat, 's cuz Ted's got me. Sorry I spooked y'.

I see...

*That was reasonable enough - she wasn't the type of woman that posted cutesy nice things on the network, after all. Faye wonders at his laughter, but her smirk grows at the feeling of his finger on her cheek - she really doesn't mind that at all. But that promptly disappears as he continues to explain*

Namur? You're in on this whole body swap thing too, huh?

*Faye just slowly shakes her head, but she looks at this person's body with a renewed, if somewhat curious, interest*

And what kind of man is this...Ted? Will he be pleased to know that you are using him to flirt with hot women in clubs?

Edited 2017-09-04 18:10 (UTC)

Naw he'll be mortified an' it serves 'im right. Look at this guy! Almost pretty 'nuff t' be a damn girl an' he's still a shitty virgin!

[Namur shakes his head. Shameful. He'd paused for a moment to gesture at his current body, but now he slips both hands around Faye's waist, going back to dancing as they talk.]

Doubt he'd be surprised though. An' I ain't gonna deflower 'im or nothin' so if he's got a li'l perfume on his clothes in the mornin' he can deal with it.

[He shrugs.]

Huh.

*Faye glances him over again, appraising but also quite amused by all of this*

So he's a pure one, hmm? He sure isn't a virgin cause no one will give him one.

*Men and women both. She grins with his hands round her waist, hips still swaying as she reaches for something in her purse - a stick of red lipstick*

Maybe we should have some fun with him...

...... Actually that might be part a the problem. Dude can't keep his damn mouth shut an' he thinks hello whore's akin t' wishin' a person a pleasant good mornin'. Do 'im some good t' get laid I bet...

[Namur trails off slowly, partially because what is she getting after in that purse, and partially because stooping down that little bit has offered him a damn good view. He snorts and chuckles conspiratorially.]

A'ight, nothin' too glarin' obvious, I gotta meet 'im at midnight since he thinks this shit's only gonna last that long. But if yer thinkin' what I'm thinkin', 's gonna be funny as hell.

[Or like kicking a puppy. But it's worth a shot!]

*Feel free to look, Namur, there is plenty to see here. She continues to move in his hands while applying the red lipstick*

I think this will be pretty funny too.

*She smirks at him, then at once leans forward to kiss him hard on the neck, though deliberately with most of her lips against the collar of his shirt to leave a red mark*

[Namur breathes in sharply, arms tensing around Faye, pulling her closer.
Lord of the Sea this is bad. It's good but it's bad because it's good. Shit, he wants more of that, more on him and not the shirt. But for one thing he can't let her know about The Shirt and for another it isn't just Ted he's made promises to that apply to this particular situation.

Shit.

He should have been ready, he should have known better. He's in a bottom rotted human body, of course he's going to feel every little thing like a million times stronger. The heat of her breath, the little creases in her lips, the lipstick pulling just a bit as it transfers to his skin.

But he laughs because it's just a kiss. Not even on the lips! He hasn't broken his promise to Ted, and he's not going to.

But he did promise Thash...

Does that even matter here? It's not like the smolt's around, and it's not like this is his Faye...

He should probably say something either way.]

Mmm.

[Brilliant.]

*Faye grinned against his neck when he reacted in that way - it was quite a pleasing reaction. It was a pity that Namur had suggested that he had to be careful with Ted's body - it had been some time since she had any react quite like her.

But then she stood up straight again, lips still red but less bright than before. She pouted in a teasing way at his reponse, but soon shook her head and smirked*

There. That will keep him guessing in the morning.

Way t' be there for me, Faye.

[Namur's getting a headache from being around her, but he's learned to deal with it better by now. Who gives a shit if she doesn't remember? He counted her as a friend, and sometimes, it's just nice to hang out with someone who isn't trying to wheedle your brain or find an excuse to kill you. He leans his forehead against her temple, pulling her close again and holding her there in a drawn out-swaying to the beat-style hug.]

So how's shit goin' for y' here? The hell y' even doin' with yerself every day?

That's only the start. There can be a whole trail of kisses if you want there to be...

*Faye smirks at him, allowing him to imagine for himself where that lipstick trail might lead. She is happy to lean so closely with him, her arms casually around him*

Hmm. A bounty here or there. Working at the casino. Helping Gale with his next business idea... Not a whole lot.

*Her embrace stiffens slightly as she explains; it seems Genessia is making her restless*

[He outright laughs at that... but it sounds wrong, for him.]

Jus' wanna give the smolt a bit a shit, not launch 'im int' a murderous hissy fit! Heheh!

[Namur can feel her tensing up, and breathes deeply. He wishes he could taste her feelings, but he'll just have to go with what he's got. Thankfully, this Faye has so far been remarkably similar to the one he knew before, so Namur wages a guess, and hopes he's right.]

'S hard hangin' 'round the same place so long, eh? Know how that is. I's a pirate 'fore, don't know that I ever told y' that. Years 'go... worlds 'go. So I get it.

[He lifts her chin with a hooked finger, gently angling her head to look up at him.]

Don't let it kill yer spirit, aye?

Murderous hissy fit? Hmmph. How upsetting. That's not the reaction that I usually get...

*Still, she seems amused of a sort - it's not as though she is genuinely seducing him right now. Though...that is largely because she's been told not to*

A pirate?

*Faye chooses to focus on that for a moment, rather than worrying about herself. When he lifts her face so that her eyes meet his, she tries to keep her expression casual, smirking a little*

Don't worry..I'm sure I'll find a project or two to keep me entertained. Though the same goes for you, pirate.

Yeah, well. Y' ain't met Ted. Make sure y' got a dictionary handy if y' do, though, cuz ho-ly shit...

[Urrrrgh he shouldn't, but she's making that little smirk and it's sexy as hell. He can't help it, he wants to drop his head and get that smirk all over his lips while he still has them, maybe see if he can remember how real kissing works and give her a reason to grin.

Namur closes his eyes so he won't see it anymore, but he does drop his forehead gently against hers, his heart racing and body tense.]

Hey Faye? Mind if I ask y' a real personal question?

*His reaction intrigues her - there seems to be some kind of conflict going on there, though she can't be sure she knows what it is. The smirk is still there as he rests his forehead against hers, though he can't see it. She instead lifts a hand and places it at the back of his neck, tickling the skin there with the tips of her fingers* Mhm? And what might that be...?

[Goosebumps rise up and travel all over his body. Namur twitches a little as they go. That's also not a thing he's used to having his body doing. Lord of the Sea, no wonder humans go so batshit crazy sometimes. He takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly.]

If someone makes a promise t' y', then they get sent t' 'nother world like this only differnt, would y' 'xpect 'em t' keep it? Even if y' ain't there with 'em no more, an' y' might never be in the same universe ever 'gain?

*Faye isn't sure if that breath is because of her fingers or because of what he is about to say. Incase it is the fingers, she allows them to tease his neck a few moments more*

Hmm. That's quite the question. But I imagine it depends. If they had memory of me, I would definitely expect them to keep it. If they had no idea I ever even existed then...guess there's nothing can be done about that or any promises made.

*Now her other hand lies flat against his chest*

Why? What big secrets are you carrying around?

Right.

[Namur lifts his head and kisses her brow, feeling his heart beat quick beneath the weight of her hand.]

Got several worlds' worth a secrets, Faye. They gimme a headache sometimes. Was nice flirtin' with y', though. But I ain't totally in control a this damn body so I oughta cast off. See y' 'round, aye?

*Faye frowns at his sudden announcement of his departure. She takes her hands back, not hugely placated by that kiss on her forehead*

Are you serious? That's it? What - did I answer your question wrong?

Nope. Helped me 'member I oughta not be a knucklehead is all. Sorry I can't 'xplain more. It'd jus'... get too weird.

[Namur's expression, filtered through Ted's youthful face, really does look like something a kicked puppy would give.]

Sorry.

Right...

*Wow. Okay. She thought this had been going well and that he had like her attention, even if it wasn't his body. She steps away from him and tries to shrug it off, ignoring those eyes*

It's fine. Whatever. You need to do what you need to do.

[Oh, he did, he enjoyed every moment, more than she'll probably ever know. He grits his teeth, then nods, also stepping back.]

Later.

[Namur turns on his heels, almost too much since he's used to having more bulk to turn, and stalks away, rubbing his hand through his hair and growling at himself. What a bottom-feeding dumbass.]

Sure. Later.

*Whatever. Obviously he wasn't having a good time. She must have imagined that. Faye watches him turn, the finally pats her hair and smoothes her skirt before drifting off to the bar again. Alone*

Fortunately, Koishi wouldn't scare the cats away. Her presence did nothing for them, the little youkai's natural state often maintaining a careful indifference toward animals save her sister's pets or when she was actively hunting.

This also, unfortunately, meant the cats were not acknowledging her. So it would likely be quite a surprise when Namur discovered the little youkai staring blankly at him with head tilted and mouth slightly open as the mind of big-brother-fish-man snuggled a pile of kittens in a body that looked and smelled exactly like a certain fool's.

"Oh what in the Yama's nine hells am I looking at?"

Seemed like even when he didn't smell like dinner, the cats took to him like catnip. Their little tongues rasped against fragile human skin, tickling somehow in spite of their barbs when they licked the back of his hands. Namur gave them nice, firm scratches over their coats, likely dislodging no small number of fleas. He lay back and waved upside-down at Koishi, chuckling as a few of the cats took this as an act of aggression and jumped, fleeing with their tails puffed.

"Hey Koishi! How's it goin'? Uh. Some weird shit happened this morning. Don't ask, I ain't got a clue. Y' like cats?" He held one up in offering. It purred like a motor.

"But I did just ask though." She was pouting some, floating over. "I like cats. Sis has lots of them." She reached down to pet them, though they seemed fairly indifferent toward the little youkai.

"Why are you hanging out with cats though, mister? And why do you look like Mister Spades?"

"Y' call 'im Mister Spades?" Namur had a moment of distraction, and glances up at his left hand. Of course, it was Ted's hand, and free of tattoos, so there really wasn't any point in the gesture. He sat up and turned to talk to Koishi, folding the cat securely against his chest so it wouldn't freak out. "Anyway I'unno what happened. One second Ted's jus' layin' there sawin' logs t' wake the dead, so I reached down t' wake 'im up. Next second, I'm Ted. 'Cept I'm still me. Some messed up shit, ain't it? Heheheh!"

A shame indeed, but someone else had their own opinion to this matter and it was Blair. Another cat? In her turf? Nope. A low growl echoed from the other side, and it was Blair. Blair crept slowly towards the cat who thought it was about to get a free meal. Little by little, she crept closer, fangs out and nails dragging on the ground as she walked between Ted and the other cat. Between as in, on Ted's lap with one paw on the fish. Blair let out a hiss as a fair warning to the other cat, if the flickered tail wasn't enough.

Shoo kitty!

Edited 2017-08-13 01:39 (UTC)

Namur watched all this in silence, up until Blair plopped herself and her extended claws right into his lap. Then he laughed so that he wouldn't yell.

"Take it easy there, them parts is tender, Sweetheart. Guess y' did miss yer fish this mornin', didn'tcha? Well, here y' go. Now get them stabby li'l nails outta my crotch, aye?"

Were her ears deceiving? Blair retract her nails and looked up to the Ted person curiously. "Sorry Ted, Blair didn't know how tender you were." She patted Ted's lap with one paw gently as the other paw remained on her prize.

"You know, you don't sound like yourself. You feeling okay?" Blair asked as her ears perked up curiously.

"'S cuz I ain't. Ted, I mean," Namur said. If Blair's gonna run off the other cat, then she's gonna have to put up with the consequences. Namely, Namur knocking that little hat off her head so he can pet between her ears. "Weird shit happened this mornin', 's why I didn't go for my usual swim. 'M Namur. Crazy, huh?"

Blair blinked twice learning this development. Zwan wasn't going to be happy about that. In fact, after Namur flicked her hat off her head, the tip of her hat wiggled before a freaky fabric hand stretched out with a face. It didn't look too happy and couldn't do much since it was vulnerable. But it seemed Blair didn't mind because she was being petted. Blair nudged her head high and towards Namur's hand with a purr. "You don't say? You don't smell fishy, but it's pretty fishy."

"So what are you going to do while you're Ted?"

In Ted's body, the tender emotions don't get obscured by protruding shark teeth and a boorishly blunt face. He smiles wistfully as a soft breeze flits through golden hair, obliging Blair by scratching just a bit harder, ruffling her fur a little only to smooth it once more.

"Think I'mma jus' do this for a bit. Human skin's a hell of a lot more sensitive'n mine an' it feels..." Man he doesn't even have a word for it. The soft silky fur tickling against his skin magnified a hundredfold. It's weird not to be blushing, really, but Ted's just not as prone to it, so he chuckles sheepishly instead. "Hell if I know what t' call it. Feels happy. Then I figure I'll eat some things. Human food. All that burned up dead shit they love cuz when y' taste it with yer tongue 's like heaven. Gotta try some spicy wings an' some cake at the very least. Whaddy' think, any other suggestions?"

Meanwhile, her hat on the ground inched closer and closer to the two trying to return to it's owner. Don't mind the hat dragging itself.

Blair let out a content purr as she leaned her head closer to Namur's hand as he scratched. When it was a little too rough, Blair shaken her head and leaned on it again for more attention. Sometimes her claws slipped out of her paws enough to poke Namur's skin.

"Sounds like fun. Hmm..." Blair brushed one paw across Namru's lap, gently. Like a light bulb, Blair looked up lit up. "You have got to try pumpkin pie!"

Edited 2017-08-29 01:34 (UTC)

Normally, he wouldn't mind- okay maybe a little but all of him is rock hard from head to foot and everywhere in between. But this isn't him this is Ted, and his skin is much more squishy. Especially near the tender parts. So he fidgets every time there's a claw because girl!

"Yeah, a'ight! We'll get us some pumpkin pie! Now couldja please stop pokin' 'round the tender bits? Ain't kiddin', human skin don't take it very well." He shoos her just a touch with the back of his hand, moving her over toward his knee just enough to make it not so awkward. Then the petting resumes because he's not done with that, nope. He's scratching under her chin when he notices the hat inching its way back toward them, and snorts. "Looks like yer li'l hat got picked up by a shitty hermit crab, look at it go! Heheheheh!"

Blair can't help the nails, especially scratching her head like that. She giggled when Namur winced by her claws, poor guy and she really had to be careful about it. Blair retracted her paw, giggled sheepishly, "my bad. It sorta happens." But hey, she looked forward to some pumpkin pie, the cat's face lit up with the thought about it.

She stepped back enough to his knees, which she didn't mind. Namur was a squishy human after all. Blair laid close to his knees, lifted her chin up and let out more purrs. When Namur made a comment about her hat, she side glanced and saw her poor familiar hat trying to return. "It's Zwan actually," Blair said with a wink. "He doesn't like to be left alone."

"Zwan?" Namur stumbled over the name a little. "The hell kinda thing's a zwan? Ain't that like, a bigass bird or somethin'?"

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Out of body experiences aren't all they're cracked up to be [Open Log] (backdated cuz I'm a loser)

Prompt 4!

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so late and so sorry

<3

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Prompt 2

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Prompt 2!

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