video;

[tenminutes]

As Battler Ushiromiya's currently pissed off girlfriend, I'd like to give all girls in this place permission to punch him in the face if he tries to hit on you provided you just let me know what he did. This includes but is not limited to him talking about or making a break for your breasts, thighs, or even just looking at you funny.

By looking at you funny, I mean he does this face.

[ And cue Yuri doing the absolute most horrible imitation of this face as is humanly possible. Really, it's not even close since she doesn't ever make faces like that. It mostly just looks funny. ]

So basically, feel free to smack him whenever you want since I think his concussion is probably gone. It will make everyone feel better, including me who has to put up with him posting his perversions all over the network to every person who looks somewhat feminine.

Comments

[tenminutes]

You'd be surprised how dumb someone can be.

[ She's leering at him for that. She's dealt with perverts before, and certainly odd looking people, so she's mostly just going to give him a look that says don't even try it. ]

[betel_geuse]

"Uh, actually no," Betelgeuse argued, laughing. "That is the one thing that never surprises me. People are STUPID!"

He just grinned at her look. He knew that look. Betelgeuse knew that look so well, he was practically married to it! People never seemed to realize that look was a temptation, in and of itself. Betelgeuse had to do whatever that look was discouraging! (And, given his nature, if involved a woman possibly getting naked, well, all the better!)

[tenminutes]

I can agree on that!

[ Yuri actually sounds pretty cheery about calling everyone stupid. But that's what she tends to roll with. Everyone is stupid and from her, it's not really an insult. The stupid people are the ones who take chances and follow their hearts instead of their heads. ]

I don't like the look of that grin though..

[betel_geuse]

"Whaaat? What grin? I'm just smiling at ya! What can possibly be bad about a smile, babes?" Betelgeuse whines a bit, trying to convey an image of wounded innocence. It'd probably work better if he kept his eyes above her neck.

[tenminutes]

[ Yuri notices that. Yep, okay, problem solved. She lifts the video-phone up so it only shows her face from her chin upward. ]

Here, you're like at least 20% more believable now.

[betel_geuse]

Betelgeuse gave her an "aw-shucks" type of grin.

"You're cruel, babes, really. What'd you want to do that for?"

[tenminutes]

Because at least when Battler does it he's got nice muscles wrapped up in a nice suit for me to look at so I can't judge him for it too badly. I can totally judge you for it.

[betel_geuse]

"Hey, now, don't be dissing my clothes!" Betelgeuse scolded, frowning. "As for muscles, well, I got it where it counts, babes. The bad thing about muscle bound dudes? They're almost always morons. Anyway, if I was any better looking, I'd melt brains!"

[tenminutes]

[ Yuri holds up a hand, looking strangely proud for the words that come out of her mouth in the following seconds. ]

I get along best with morons, idiots, and complete dumbasses.

[betel_geuse]

"Oh. Well, okay, I mean, if that's your type!" Betelgeuse said, looking a bit skeptical. "Have you actually tried dating a guy with a brain? I mean, we can be a lot of fun, when we don't have a lot of repression and hang-ups."

[tenminutes]

That statement was based off of friendships since I've only actually ever dated one person.

[ She spent her entire life and a good portion of her death pushing everyone away, followed by forming a battlefront instead of just calling people friends. It took Battler more than a year to get her to consider it. ]

Plus I've had enough repression and hang-ups for two lifetimes.

[betel_geuse]

"You and me both, babes," Betelgeuse assured her. "Never really understood why people like wrapping themselves up in a bunch of silly rules. But, seriously, how come a gorgeous babe like you hasn't dated more? I mean, sure, ya got lousy taste in guys, but even idiots should be able to see what a catch you are!"

[tenminutes]

I was busy being dead and declaring war against god while being dead on account of the repression and hang-ups.

[ She figures it's a legitimate excuse. ]

[betel_geuse]

"Being dead is no excuse, believe me, but I can see how declaring war on a god would be time consuming," Betelgeuse assured her, grinning. "Wait? You were killed by repression and hang-ups. Did you die of boredom?? BABES, THAT IS SO SAAAD!"

[tenminutes]

No, I was killed and stuck in an afterlife for people with serious regrets for an unknown number of years with very few fish in a very small sea while simultaneously not wanting to ever care about anyone ever again. It was a situation. I'm better now.

[ That's probably the vaguest way she can think of to put it, sure, but this guy seems fun and she can definitely say that entire thing completely flippantly. ]

[betel_geuse]

"Oh. Yeah, death can do that to a person. Kinda sucks. So, are you still dead? You don't look it."

[tenminutes]

No, I'm alive now. That's another complicated but more fresh story. I've only been alive for about a month now.

[betel_geuse]

"Reallly?" Betelgeuse purred. "How did you manage to do that, babes? Coming back to life is pretty rare."

[tenminutes]

Someone scooped the girl who this body was supposed to house out and put me in. Which goes back to being pissed off at my boyfriend and we end up at the start of this conversation again.

[betel_geuse]

"Oh. So, uh, what happened to the girl who was in that body, then? I mean, not that I care," Betelgeuse hastened to add, "but, y'know, there are fates worse than death. My job is to keep ghosts, well, souls from being exorcised."

[tenminutes]

I don't know. It's not like I was asked first, and before I could figure anything out we ended up here. Besides, it's technically the same soul. Like say you're Hachiko the dog then you die, get reincarnated as Michiko the person. So technically the soul's still here, but the incarnation who's supposed to be here isn't.

[ She looks like she's definitely concerned about this.. she's happy to be alive, but the cost of that isn't something she's willing to pay, since she considers memories to be who a person is a lot more than a blank slate of a soul. A soul is the base print, the memories are what make you into who you are. To Yuri, wiping them is just as bad as killing them. ]

[betel_geuse]

"Huh. Well, I wouldn't worry about it too much. Worse case scenario is she's a ghost now. Sure, death sucks, big time, but she still exists. Anyway, possession is nine tenths of the law, right?"

[tenminutes]

..I guess that makes sense. I might have to redefine what ghost means a little bit, but you said you're an expert in that sort of thing, right? Hilarious joke about possession aside.

[ Yuri's sense of humor is horrible, it really is. Even if she didn't even laugh at it, she found it funny. ]

[betel_geuse]

Betelgeuse grinned, glad to find someone who appreciated his humor. He knew he was funny, even it was hard sometimes to convince others.

"Six hundred plus years of being a ghost? Yeah, you could say I'm an expert. How do you usually define ghost?"

[tenminutes]

[ She's so going to make dead jokes at him later. She thought she'd never get to make them again, but she'll definitely make some at him if the opportunity rises. ]

I don't know. I defined a lot of things the standard way that people are told in movies until I actually died and got sent to an eternal afterlife high school for teenagers who are unable to move on located in the middle of the wilderness that just looped back into itself and leaned really heavily on computers somehow. I just figure if someone believes in it, they'll end up wherever fits their situation.