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Does anybody know how to stop your roommate from fighting your cat for the bed?
Alternatively, does anybody know how to convince a cat not to claw out your roommate's eyes?
Alternatively, does anybody know how to convince a cat not to claw out your roommate's eyes?

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[Not helping your case: K-2So edition.]
Did I ever thank you for the reprogramming?
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There's nothing wrong with the reprogramming!
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No, there isn't. I quite like it but others might not share the sentiment.
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I'm not too terribly concerned with other people's opinion of it. They've got a whole lot of ideas what droids should or shouldn't do.
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Ok, maybe there was a bit of gloating.]
Neither I am and you are right.
We will be ok then.
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[Maybe that's a bit optimistic, but... They always manage, somehow.]
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[Except THAT ONE TIME none of them wants to talk about. Kay is happy now.]
And we will keep it that way.
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We'll even manage this cat problem of yours... somehow.
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I'm sure that once we get her those toys to scratch people suggested she will stop trying to claw at your legs.
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[And here comes a pointed look.]
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[What pointed look? Kay sees nothing.]