genessia | nine ticks; text

who the hell even nominated me for heroic??
its because im the only around here with a sweet cape right?
what are you guys even ON
whats your criteria for that

anyway so speaking of heroic shit
summer is coming for realsies and its my job as hella amazing media overlord to provide you with movies full of literally all the explosions and mind numbing violence
and maybe some actual good movies too idk well see how it goes
we need to pump out some sweet blockbusters everyone can watch the fuck out of
get hyped genessia

casting is open for these various masterpieces
let me know if anything on this list is something you wanna do
- wanna blow up some shit and let me film it in exchange for money
- want to be in a movie
- can act
- probably cant act but wanna try anyway
- know how to operate film equipment
- willing to pretend to do stupid shit for money
- willing to be a human crash test dummy / stuntman
- wanna collab for the greatest soundtrack in existence
- got crazy plot ideas youre willing to sell to me
- have a really hot bod / face
- can open this soda for me its giving me a hard time

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I certainly do now, though I would call that twisting my words just a bit.

I'm only repeating what you've been saying.

In misplaced context only.

[ Kids. ]

So, do you want me to erase your entire schedule to free you up or are you actually not interested in this in the slightest and being totally nice about it but you'll still come to the premiere and be supportive later?

While I am attempting to be nice, I wouldn't take the time to consider it if I wasn't intending on following through. [ Being in a his movie out of goodwill couldn't hurt public image, could it? Besides, he did sort of owe Dave even if this hardly began to cover the debt. ] Unless you were the one not interested and merely being polite?

Do you secretly wanna be a star? [ Wiggles eyebrows for a second then holds his hands up ] Um. No. I'm not being polite. I can't afford fucking politeness. Every actor up until this point has been some generic Genessian NPC person and me. I, like, need people to be in this.

I could already secretly be a star. You would have no way of knowing. [ Eyebrow wiggle, meet an equally ridiculous wink. ] I certainly can't say no when you make it sound so dire. Have you gained any other inquiries yet?

That's true. I would have no way of knowing since I'm not caught up on the porno industry. [ Smiiirk ] A couple but they're mainly focused on the exploding things part.

That... is not at all what I meant. [ He was taken aback for a second or two and honestly had to hold himself back from reacting too strongly. To be reprimanding was probably better. ] Isn't that more than a bit inappropriate for someone your age to be talking about?

[ ... ] What? I can't crack jokes about people fucking on film?

When you happen to be barely -- if even -- a teenager? No, Dave. You really don't.

[ Never mind that it was distasteful at any age. ]

Ohhhh my fucking god. [ facepalms ]

While we're being honest, the vulgarity to word ratio in your speech is also a bit concerning.

Can we go back to the part where you think I'm eight before we go preaching like a pretentious fucklord about my apparently shitty use of vocabulary?

I don't think you're eight. [ Good grief. ] I'm not belittling your age, I'm only attempting to make a point.

The point about maturity being based on age and how you're a prude?

I beg your pardon if finding jokes about starring in adult cinema to be distasteful is too old fashioned for you. I said nothing about your maturity.

Dude, it was totally implied.

Fine. Take it as you will, but offense was not my aim.

I'm seventeen.

...what? [ Give that a few moments to process. ] You're telling the truth, aren't you?

Why the asslicking shit would I make that up?

[ He put his hands up in an attempt to placate him. ] I sincerely apologize. Evidently I made a significant error and spoke out of turn. [ How was he seventeen? If this was some kind of time travel nonsense... ]

Apparently puberty failed me by skipping me entirely or something. It's getting a little irritating. You get it, right? You look young as hell and you're probably forty or something.

Yes, I imagine it would be quite frustrating. I'm sorry to have added to it. [ He squinted. "Young as hell?" ] Not quite. I'm thirty-two.

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