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to the fuck who robbed the bank and made me wait two weeks to get my paycheck

'wheres my fuckin cash
just wait till i find your ass
hope you like smoothies'

in other news i dont have any other news i just wanted to post an angry haiku on the network

hi bane

i found the cuisinart. ill leave it to your imagination which appliance that is see you in an hour bae

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wow where'd you get a picture of a giant vibrator with novelty teeth

thats pretty sick, send me the craft directions

I took the picture of him while I was trying to catch him back when he robbed the bank. Now, do you have any information on him or not? Anything regarding his whereabouts? His hiding place? His abilities?

hes got bombs a cyborg arm and hates dumpsters and teleporting and my internal organs so

like

thats half the people i know from home

if i knew where he was i wouldnt tell a cop because i need to repurpose his entire face as a toothbrush and soap holder and i think thats in the big law book of nonoes.

It sure is...

In that case, just step back and let us deal with him. We'll return everything that was stolen.

see you cant return my dignity

[Unfortunately, that much is true...]

...I'm afraid you're on your own in that regard. But we can rob you of even more dignity if "repurpose his face", as you put it.

lmao because you did a super job of that before

how long did it take to put that dumpster fire out

...And you said that was just a hypothetical question...

[Not that she believed it, but it didn't give her enough reason to go after him.]

I wonder if I should report you to David. If you follow through with your threats, or disguising your activities as "hypothetical situations," that would make you as dangerous as the criminals you're threatening.

bcuz being an asshole is illegal

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