011 | my star has left me (to take the bitter pill)

[mortal_son]

[ AUDIO ] | [ Backdated to Monday afternoon ]

Uh, there -

[ There's some shuffling sound, like he's setting the phone up somewhere, still. ]

Right. So.

... I ain't good at this, either the talkin or the - well.

But just writin it seemed ... not enough, and. All of you are probably sick of seein my face, so.

[ There's a brief pause, before he goes on. He sounds very, very tired, but his voice is nonetheless serious, and firm. ]

I frightened the hell outta a lot of you.

I said a lot of stuff, some of it to some people I don't even know.

And, it's complicated, but I can say that - while it wasn't all me, it was a part of me. So, yeah, I ain't gonna pretend it isn't my fault.

I'm sorry.

[ He swallows. ]

I am sorry.

I'm not gonna. Just sit around feelin guilty, though. Not -

[ Coughs. ]

- Yeah. So.

Up to you if you take this seriously.

But let me know if I can make it up to you.

[ And then the audio is turned off. ]

Comments

[Video]

[leekspins]

Don't be sorry!

[She makes the response as a knee-jerk reaction, blurting out the words before silently kicking herself. He's exhausted, he needs to rest. But...but she doesn't want him to go to sleep feeling guilty either.]

I admit I don't know what happened, or why. But you weren't in control, I understood that much. So just...

[Her fingers clutch at her skirt, knotting the fabric as she maintains her smile.]

Just get some rest. I'm happy you're okay.

[She doesn't mention the part about him wanting to make it up to people, since she can't really believe he was including her in that blanket statement. Most likely it was for those who went inside the Midnight Channel to pull him out.]

[Audio| Private ]

[mortal_son]

[ After messing with the controls for a few minutes, Shinjiro sets up a private feed - and makes sure it's a private actually private.

Sighs ]

Don't think I don't owe you an apology, too.

... You waited outside the arch for me.

[ Sounds pretty gruff, quiet - ] ... Didn't mean t'make you worry.

[Audio| Private ]

[leekspins]

Oh, well...that was pretty much my own choice, ne?

[She rubs the back of her neck. Honestly, he doesn't need to say he's sorry. He doesn't know her. Why would he owe her anything?]

...How are you feeling? You didn't seem injured, so I didn't offer, but if you got hurt...

[He'd tell her, wouldn't he? Or maybe he wouldn't. It isn't as if she knows him all that well either!]

A-anyway, you'd do the same for me or anybody else if the positions were reversed. It's fine!

Video

[clevermind]

It's alright Shinjiro.

[A soft smile rests across her lips as she addresses the screen. She hasn't been able to see him since their last talk and she's been worried about him.]

I am happy to see that you are well.

[Belle pauses, chewing on her lower lip.]

Perhaps you'd be interesting in meeting soon? I'd like to see you if that's alright.

[ Audio | Private ]

[mortal_son]

... I'm sorry for worryin you.

[ Because she had been pretty worried, hadn't she? And, if he remembered right - not completely sure about that, but - it sounded like she was halfway to storming down to the subarchway herself.

Shurgs, unheard by the mic. ] Yeah. Uh.

... Don't think I'm up for it today, but.

[ He owed her that much. ] We can meet up.

[ Audio | Private ]

[clevermind]

It's fine. [Her voice gathers strength and ease as she continues.] It's what friends do.

[Being close to someone means that you're going to worry about them. It's just a way to show that you care about them. She might have traveled half way to the archway before returning home but she doesn't want to bother him with that knowledge. Everything Belle does, she does because she wants too.]

Later.

[She agrees in an affection tone.]

How are you feeling? You don't have to share what happened if you don't want too but... well, I'm happy that you're feeling better.

[Video]

[melodiouspacifist]

[Demyx leans forward a little, he's been worried about Shinjiro.]

Is everything okay now? Are you okay?

[Worried as he can be, at any rate.]

[ Audio | Private ]

[mortal_son]

[ He remembered how well Demyx had gotten on with his Shadow, and in a way, it didn't surprise him. Did the guy really offer to go to bat for him, with the Guardians? It was fuzzy, but he thought he remembered something like that. ]

Yeah.

... Things are gonna be better than they've been for a while, really.

[ That was hard to admit, but. He felt like he owed Demyx, for worrying him, and for his friend's support. ]

I'm just really damn exhausted.

[ Audio | Private ]

[melodiouspacifist]

[He really did, and did tell them to back off with no success.]

I'm glad it's going to end well, at least! I'm not sure what was going on, but I didn't want you to get hurt.

[He doesn't know why that's weird, because it seemed like Cassian thought it was too.]

The kind that doesn't get better with sleep right? I've been there.

[Video]

[koishi_komeiji]

A pair of glowing green eyes filled the screen before Koishi pulled back a little, blinking and tilting her head.

"Oh... OH! It's working!" And a smile. "Don't be upset, Mister. You're back now and that's what matters. So you don't have to apologize like that. No one got hurt."

She looked nothing like how she looked in the TV world.

"You should be more careful with yourself though. If you're always so hard on yourself then you'll never find a way to become a better person."

[ Audio | Private ]

[mortal_son]

Shinjiro toggled it onto audio feed, and private, out of habit. Then, he looked at the screen. For some reason, out of all of the conversations his Shadow had had - hers is one of the ones he remembered the clearest. It was pretty strange.

Even stranger, talking with her now, after all that had happened. He wondered who she really was, and why she could do what she'd did. Was it just being a youkai? Or was there something more?

He said, sounding a bit wry, "Yeah. Kinda figured that out, with the whole acceptin my Shadow bit, and gainin new resolve, or whatever."

But he didn't sound unkind about it. He definitely knew she was right, considering. "So. Let me introduce myself properly. I'm Shinjiro Aragaki."

audio;

[corruptedsave]

So... What you just said some mean things?

[Hey it's that kid that was asking about awful things and such a while ago, and yanno not being helpful at all.]

It's not like you killed anyone, so why apologize.

audio;

[mortal_son]

[ He only really knows them from the dog video - they were anonymous when they were asking about the worst things people had done, that they felt remorse for.

Sounding slightly confused: ] Cause I was a jerk to people who didn't deserve it, and I'm ownin up to it?

[Audio]

[savage_nymphxii]

Shinji. I want coffee. Are you up for coffee?

[Audio]

[mortal_son]

[ Reflexively: ] Don't call me Shinji.

And I could [ he almost says 'murder a cup of coffee', but thinks better of it -] use a cup of coffee, yeah.

[audio]

[youfool]

Oh, thank God! I was wondering what that doppelganger business was about. Glad to know it's all settled. Welcome back, Shinjiro.

[Glad he wasn't killing criminals, too.]

[audio]

[mortal_son]

... Thanks.

[ Yeah, he's not sure he's going to explain what happened exactly to Ted. ]

Sorry for alarmin you.

audio;

[eiga]

I completely missed whatever it is you're talking about, but... I hope you feel better soon.

[He doesn't sound so good. Although Akira sounds a bit worn out himself, too.]

audio;

[mortal_son]

[ He feels relief that Akira missed that - one less person he kind of respected, watching him self-destruct, was a good thing - but he asks, worried: ]

What happened to you?

[southpaw_senpai]

[Akihiko just walks into the apartment after the feed concludes. Without a word he grabs a water bottle from the fridge and makes his way to a chair in the living room, stepping behind Shinji as he did. As he walks past, Akihiko gently bonks his friend with a fist before flopping into his chair.]

[mortal_son]

[ Shinjiro rubs the back of his head, shooting a mock glare at Aki. He looked at his CPU, sighed, and then slowly got up. At least the bone-weary exhaustion was temporary.

When he slumps onto the couch beside Aki's chair, he's got a rueful expression on his face, and a bottle of water in his own hand. ]

So.

I think I've probably been fired.

video;

[growsveggies]

If I must admit. You didn't frighten me at all. That might not help, but at least for me, you didn't need to apologize.

[But that was probably just her.]

Though I guess I can at least admit it was certainly unexpected.

audio on his end;

[mortal_son]

[ A sigh ]

Good.

I was sure as hell surprised by it, too. [ Tone is wry and bemused. ]

[Audio]

[mikotwin]

Um... I'm not sure if you're the same person from a while ago...? I responded to several anonymous postings and so far my offer still stands. If you were one of those postings at least.

If you weren't... Please let me know!

[Audio | Private ]

[mortal_son]

[ It takes him a while to figure out what she's talking about.

Then - she's that healer. When he was responding to that kid trolling people, who was pretending to be a villain. ]

Uh. Thanks.

I'm fine, though. I just need some rest.