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5th Aura | Text
[Anonymous text.]
Weapons experts.
Kind of without a weapon right now and not even sure if I should get it out of the stupid rock.
[His poor family heirloom. Even if it's probably safer in there than in his hands.]
I'm looking to build my own. It's a tradition where I'm from. I'm also wondering what made you choose yours? If it works for you, there must be a reason.
[Maybe not one of the more hopeful reasons he would have believed in the past. He's done with that. But one that makes sense.]
Stay on topic.
[Private text to Weiss, not anonymous.]
My answer is yes.
Weapons experts.
Kind of without a weapon right now and not even sure if I should get it out of the stupid rock.
[His poor family heirloom. Even if it's probably safer in there than in his hands.]
I'm looking to build my own. It's a tradition where I'm from. I'm also wondering what made you choose yours? If it works for you, there must be a reason.
[Maybe not one of the more hopeful reasons he would have believed in the past. He's done with that. But one that makes sense.]
Stay on topic.
[Private text to Weiss, not anonymous.]
My answer is yes.
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I thought there were different worlds, not universes.
No. You mean like using your fists as a weapon instead of relying on one.
Maybe. I've never tried before.
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do i really gotta go into this one
ok paradoxes are contradictions
like
wise fool
fucking technically impossible right
but in terms of time
its when something happens that cant possibly happen
because then shit that already happened cant happen
like if i get a scar on like my hand or something right
but then go back in time to prevent myself from getting it
i made a paradox
because it i dont have the fucking scar i never would go back to prevent myself from getting it
and my existence is now moot
my timeline ceases to exist
i fucking die
are you following this
and theres different worlds in different universes
its this whole thing comprised of multiple alternate realities
and theyre all destroying themselves to make way for better ones
its this whole thing
could be worth a shot ???
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Maybe. There's that gym that teaches martial arts or whatever.
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youre probably not going to be causing a lot of paradoxes
since you dont time travel
presumably ???
hey why not
better than sword fighting imo
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How long have you been at it?
Yeah. I guess it is. Less likely to stab yourself.
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dude come on
yep
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Did you lose track of time or something?
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no
listen anon
i aint gotta tell you shit
and nobody needs to know the real answer to that fucking question
i dont even want to know the answer to that fucking question
but i do
thats for me to know and everyone else to stay blissfully fucking unaware of
i made three days last four fucking months one time
and that wasnt even in the current timeline
if were talking the full accumulation of collective paradoxical bullshit then youre going to shit yourself
so
in conclusion
a while
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Sounds exhausting. Like you're looking forward to something, then some paradoxes happen and by the time you fixed everything you don't care anymore.
Are all time users and travelers cryptic jerks who think they can control everything.
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but it does in fact suck major
exhausting as fuck
i told you i dont control everything wtf
but yeah sure
were all assholes
im a cryptic jerk
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I know you don't. I said try to.
But you said you're just a guy so you're not as pretentious about thinking you can get away with everything like the other time bender I know.
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ok
but i can just walk into a paradox
you have to force it to happen because your current timeline went to shit
what the fuck other time bender do you know
i bet the other dude probably is a prick
if hes fucking with time like its a god damn pogo stick
just hop right on and jump motherfucker
nbd
but no dude you dont realize that aint a pogo stick
youre riding a god damn jackhammer and now the sidewalk is in fucking pieces
and everyone around is covering their ears because the noise is making ears bleed
the god damn babies are awake and crying so the dogs are barking
noise everywhere
but this asshole is deaf so he doesnt even know the shit hes causing
leave it to the professionals asshole
you need a permit to use that jackhammer
he better not be doing that here
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We're kind of stuck here.
I don't know the extent of his abilities.
Like I said, he's very cryptic. More cryptic than you. I wouldn't be surprised if that's what he was doing.
He was our headmaster. Out of the job now.
Would you be able to tell if he was?
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but if you fuck up so bad that i have to go back and shove you in a better direction
its totally your fault
technically
huh
kind of ???
i mean i would feel it
things ticking out of order
but not know where it was coming from
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So just
You kind of navigate hoping to bump into whatever it is?
I wouldn't worry too much. There's not so much less for him to control here as it would be stupid to.
He's a cryptic and manipulative, like, those...I don't know, the people who play chess and think they can control everything kind, but he's not stupid.
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just the fucking babysitter
keeping babies from sticking forks in outlets
and hitting the reset button when they die a horrible electrical death
future me usually points me in the right direction
but p much
it would be stupid too
so hes a big raging bag of dicks
but smart enough to know not to literally fuck everything over for no reason
good to know
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Does future you keep existing despite the paradox?
Yeah, but if he has a reason, it could go downhill again.
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no
paradoxes fix themselves
he always dies
what did he do to make it go downhill the first time
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Oh.
He thought keeping secrets was a good idea. Which could work for the short term. But not what he was planning.
I don't even know what he was planning.
He probably had a lot more hidden than just that basement.
But it's kind of our fault too for not stopping to ask ourselves do the good guys really sit on some giant tower and sip coffee and throw people into forests and not have some other agenda?
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as far as puns go
good job
that was fucking cringe worthy to me
and likely hilarious to the pun brigade
but jesus christ
yeah
you shouldve been on their case at the sight of the giant tower
thats specifically for witches magic castles bad guys or bad guys in magic witch castles
or people seriously overcompensating for their micro dicks
like the guys that made the washington monument
which is possibly for bad guys with tiny dicks
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It seemed pretty cool at first.
Pretty impressive.
But now it's just suspicious.
Okay I think we both know I have absolutely no context for that.
But am I right in assuming it's a giant statue that resembles a dick?
It's kind of awkward and uncomfortable to think of my headmaster like that.
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a big massive tall ass dick
suggestively seated across a statue where a mans sitting with his legs open
its gay as hell if you think about it
anyway
look
i mean you should be able to poke fun at an asshole
youre not supposed to think too deeply about whats in his pants
youre supposed to go
hahaha hes a fucking prick in all definitions of the word
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Do you think that was intentional?
Oh. I guess I can do that.
Yeah, I can. What a dick.
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a little weak but youre on your way
to a masterful insult
fuck that guy
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(no subject)